tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1498337907920629282024-02-19T00:37:09.716-06:00Brave: Taking on the Life You Were Meant to LiveAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03774267389873705088noreply@blogger.comBlogger356125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-149833790792062928.post-47802014867156720672016-01-11T08:00:00.000-06:002016-01-11T08:00:16.027-06:00Pulling Weeds: Being Thankful for Real Community <div style="border: none; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in; orphans: 1; padding: 0in;">
<span style="color: #22313f;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Guest
blogging today in the month of “Finding Thanksgiving” is Sarah
May.</span></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #22313f;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Sarah
writes about seeing happiness in the most unlikely of situations and
how we can bring that happiness to grieving people.</span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sarah is a 20-something trying to navigate the world with a little help from Jesus and little bit of sarcasm. For more from Sarah visit<span style="color: #22313f;"><span style="font-size: small;"> <a href="http://www.mycompletemayhem.net/">http://www.mycompletemayhem.net</a></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #22313f;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><i>I Hope They're Weeds</i></span></span></span></h3>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj8NJ28dliR_wHNDUfVUWUTu6HZoxWFdKHFJPuHcJ2qeLUd323Q8ZMImtz-PoHLJtcJdoB0Sp7Vbpg9HuroZA3tDXjfyrnEEHzM4E2LQ3LCX1AUFLcn9avT3k7zhNOOkdowcrl-sDqtV0c/s1600/IMG_4489.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj8NJ28dliR_wHNDUfVUWUTu6HZoxWFdKHFJPuHcJ2qeLUd323Q8ZMImtz-PoHLJtcJdoB0Sp7Vbpg9HuroZA3tDXjfyrnEEHzM4E2LQ3LCX1AUFLcn9avT3k7zhNOOkdowcrl-sDqtV0c/s320/IMG_4489.jpg" width="240" /></a><span style="color: #22313f;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Killing
weeds is never fun. It may be cathartic if you’ve had a rough day,
but no one jumps at the chance to weed the garden. It’s just not
pleasant. I recently found myself cleaning the yard and killing weeds
with my trusty bottle of Round Up and like most mindless task, I
found myself thinking about life while I sprayed roundup on what I
hope were weeds.</span></span></span></div>
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<h3 style="border: none; font-weight: normal; line-height: 18.72px; margin-bottom: 0in; orphans: 1; padding: 0in;">
<span style="color: #22313f;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><i>Cancer's New Normal</i></span></span></span></h3>
<div style="border: none; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in; orphans: 1; padding: 0in;">
<span style="color: #22313f;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">You
see, the weeds in my yard are two and half years old. I know this
because that’s how long it’s been since our yard received some
serious love. The weeds were symbolic of our lives going through
cancer and then grief. When you enter the world of life with cancer,
your new normal does not involve yard work, or home repairs. It
involves clinics, hospital stays, trying to not fall behind at work,
and chick-fil-a more than once a week. </span></span></span>
</div>
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<br /></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjctkR_2hJQOzJnD89_FLTRRt7QfPIpUSqxCLCbicYSiRIfvs0Zd0tmhdttFRqCSyh11Kv-JFrDDePpV2zLCofts7-rOxmZunyFIZIlsaGYehXuMjv2uLi0eAeuUs2pwGj00ToJx5MF4AM/s1600/P1050593.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjctkR_2hJQOzJnD89_FLTRRt7QfPIpUSqxCLCbicYSiRIfvs0Zd0tmhdttFRqCSyh11Kv-JFrDDePpV2zLCofts7-rOxmZunyFIZIlsaGYehXuMjv2uLi0eAeuUs2pwGj00ToJx5MF4AM/s320/P1050593.JPG" width="238" /></a><span style="color: #22313f;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">After
a year and half of our new life with cancer, we lost our new normal
life and entered the world of grief. Grief exhaustion from the past
year and half collided, and the energy to do anything outside of the
normal means of living was just to overwhelming. For every weed, a
new emotion.</span></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #22313f;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">When
we first entered the world of cancer, people were quick to help
without us asking. Food was delivered; a group showed up to finish
some home projects and clean the yard. We were and are thankful for
this. It helped make the transition easier. Then the rain fell and
the garden grew. Yard work was never anywhere near the top of the to
do list.</span></span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<h3 style="border: none; line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in; orphans: 1; padding: 0in;">
<span style="color: #22313f;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-weight: normal;"><i>Smiling in Grief</i></span></span></span></span></h3>
<div style="border: none; line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in; orphans: 1; padding: 0in;">
<span style="color: #22313f;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="font-weight: normal;">Grief
is terribly isolating. However, if you go the other side of the
world, you will find a group of women who smile the biggest smiles
you have ever seen. These women are either widows or they were left by their
husbands. Due to the culture and the legal marriage age of 15, they have
limited skills to earn a living and mouths to feed. These women have
banded together and are supported by the community. They learn job
skills as they go through life together. Not because it’s fun or
church organized. They have to. To put food on the table and educate
their children in hopes of a better future one day. </span></span></span></span></span>
</div>
<div style="border: none; line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in; orphans: 1; padding: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div style="border: none; line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in; orphans: 1; padding: 0in;">
<span style="color: #22313f;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="font-weight: normal;">If
you are ever blessed to meet a group of these women, I hope they rip
your heart out in the best of ways. I have met these women, and they
are full of more life and love for the Lord than anyone I have ever
met. In meeting them all, I wanted to do was cry with an overwhelming
emotion I cannot explain, but I couldn’t cry because a short 4'5" woman with missing teeth grabbed me by the arm singing with the
biggest smile on her face. Soon after, I found myself in the
dancing circle singing and dancing. </span></span></span></span></span>
</div>
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<br /></div>
<div style="border: none; line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in; orphans: 1; padding: 0in;">
<span style="color: #22313f;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="font-weight: normal;">I
couldn’t cry; they were just too happy and I didn’t want to rob
them of this joy. These women in this community, who had nothing,
were so very happy. This is where happiness is in its purist form.
Living life and supporting one another because it’s what they must
do to live. It wasn’t about a monthly to do at the church or a
biannual event. It wasn’t a way to feel like they had served the
Lord and filled up their Jesus tank.</span></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #22313f;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><i>Good Deeds vs Good Neighbors</i></span></span></span></h3>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQLDPT-FJlWb7hW_FxG5puRMaDI76vQ0c_tmtO0MRCE5KIZiG0jLj7teBUnGs5Q3A-XccTR5Wkl-TEmQmWpL0k1OGTn3j1XsXCOzA0zOv-Dbdk68WvSr260y1dW_kDG-rSnbTmL4XVfII/s1600/IMG_7614.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQLDPT-FJlWb7hW_FxG5puRMaDI76vQ0c_tmtO0MRCE5KIZiG0jLj7teBUnGs5Q3A-XccTR5Wkl-TEmQmWpL0k1OGTn3j1XsXCOzA0zOv-Dbdk68WvSr260y1dW_kDG-rSnbTmL4XVfII/s320/IMG_7614.jpg" width="213" /></a><span style="color: #22313f;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">My
family has been on the receiving end of these church groups and good
deed quota filling events. But here I am, killing those same weeds.
While my yard has been cleaned up and repairs fixed, those weeds grew
back, because cancer and grief aren’t a one-time thing. They are a
lifetime thing. While everyone is quick to help once or twice, few
are willing to walk this path; for those few who have we are so very
thankful.<br /><br />While my dad was sick and in the months following
his passing a neighbor would push his lawn mower down the street to
our house and cut our grass. He wouldn’t ask or say “Call if you
need anything.” He just did. Friends that call and say “I’m a
minute from your house and coming to visit”--Those are God’s
people. The small group of people whom I would call my parents' true
friends, who showed up to clean and organize our garage without
motive or invite. And this tiny group, even though my Dad no longer
gets to join them on their Friday night Mexican dinners, still always
invites my mom.<br /><br />I am often asked “Hey, how’s your mom?”.
I have decided I will no longer answer this question. I am not my
mom, and I cannot tell you how she is doing. If you want to know,
call her, message her, stop by the house and find out for yourself. </span></span></span>
</div>
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<br /></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhtZd83xIly4glqZ6fAxz2exFzq9muWshri4d8fSiivezq8NWsZZCOrV-Qb47aqZgwtQnIzbriI19EH32WN-aRtRbWTkXLLUP_IgxNJs45ViiXpnyaRZrjQcl33eYyPxl07MKcg4b1HHMI/s1600/blogpic.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhtZd83xIly4glqZ6fAxz2exFzq9muWshri4d8fSiivezq8NWsZZCOrV-Qb47aqZgwtQnIzbriI19EH32WN-aRtRbWTkXLLUP_IgxNJs45ViiXpnyaRZrjQcl33eYyPxl07MKcg4b1HHMI/s320/blogpic.jpg" width="236" /></a><span style="color: #22313f;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">I
once had a fortune cookie tell me “Joy shared is doubled, sorrow
shared is halved.” This cannot be more true.</span></span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="color: #22313f;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">This
phase of life has taught me to help other without asking and to
listen when a friend needs to talk. I can’t fix the world, or
anything any one else is going through. But I can listen.</span></span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<br />
<div style="border: none; line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in; orphans: 1; padding: 0in;">
<span style="color: #22313f;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">In
short, if you find yourself wanting to share God’s love with
someone in need, please do, but be prepared to pull up the
weeds when they regrow.</span></span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03774267389873705088noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-149833790792062928.post-12661349460949173462015-12-28T08:00:00.000-06:002015-12-28T08:00:00.750-06:00Baby Christ Grew Up--Do Christians?<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgcUBiH_l6RslGPcbMJD-kpYpS-fIHB0SEeP80UxTRjjhyInj22_J7SWSYyfoNmEqR8FB-6OmIPKweUE6u9kO2azRV-l9n5Nux8CX7P0vURtcJrdIkmzLIBjn_YyMTNrCPafZP_nr7s6Bc/s1600/IMG_0046.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="302" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgcUBiH_l6RslGPcbMJD-kpYpS-fIHB0SEeP80UxTRjjhyInj22_J7SWSYyfoNmEqR8FB-6OmIPKweUE6u9kO2azRV-l9n5Nux8CX7P0vURtcJrdIkmzLIBjn_YyMTNrCPafZP_nr7s6Bc/s400/IMG_0046.JPG" width="400" /></a><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Jesus is born.
Christmas is over. Some people are already posting pictures of their
treeless living rooms and spotless kitchens, devoid of any
remembrance of Christmas. Some people will not post a picture of
their living rom for another three months because they know the
garlands are still up and they do not want to deal with haters.
Whatever works.</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I'm not quite
ready to give Christmas up yet. But I do wonder about the aftermath. Not mine, but His. I do imagine what happened after the stable was empty and the
shepherds and magi had all gone home. What then?</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">The Bible
gives us a few hints. Jesus was sought after—in order to kill him.
Already, before he could walk, someone wanted him dead. His family
ran to another country to be safe. That's certainly a familiar story
to anyone who pays attention to the news this year. </span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjQ0uaTwcf4adbGAMnzghqVyjJhiwkedfZzXFRlY-s90SV3o6Bg0GFxiEcZM0MXOJC1lfsFVUe1ywv3bWDSd_bpzSPNF3EE5lWiTs1E2s-Lqnhho51sfznp7BG8ur1LD11woMnQIE_JpMc/s1600/IMG_2236.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjQ0uaTwcf4adbGAMnzghqVyjJhiwkedfZzXFRlY-s90SV3o6Bg0GFxiEcZM0MXOJC1lfsFVUe1ywv3bWDSd_bpzSPNF3EE5lWiTs1E2s-Lqnhho51sfznp7BG8ur1LD11woMnQIE_JpMc/s320/IMG_2236.JPG" width="239" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The glass bubble didn't last long.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Jesus' first
five years were not the idyllic preschool romps through the
countryside we imagine. They were filled with fear and danger. Within
months, the world (and the devil) knew there was a new power in the
world intent on turning our feeble ideas of power upside down and
endangering our notions of what we deserve. Anyone intent on that
becomes endangered himself.</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">Often, we ask
ourselves the question, “What next after Christmas?” We remember
the slightly depressed felling we got as children, looking around at
all the loot a week later, and wondering, “Is that it?” As
adults, we do the same. We look around at all the carnage of wrapping
paper, boxes that need to be refilled with decorations, and the
reality check of our credit card bill, and we wonder, “Is that it?”
</span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">It is, if we
never look beyond the baby in the manger. It's time now to look at
what happens next. It gives us an excellent clue as to what should
happen next for us. </span></span><br />
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Is this it? No—there is a whole lot more. But
it involves danger and fear and confronting power that does not enjoy
being confronted. It could get messy. Even messier than childbirth in
a stable.</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhF7lqBxWePntgrYGcNWQdyYF_N2HwUZRYiE9ba21ynMPm02uS2DgfFeFf_z_VYEccT-6ggNz8amdmDQZ28R8kS2IX60E5UNUhl757LpptQIH7HsmxciQaccNfEiRdRfzUmSEKgm0AY-WI/s1600/IMG_4154.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhF7lqBxWePntgrYGcNWQdyYF_N2HwUZRYiE9ba21ynMPm02uS2DgfFeFf_z_VYEccT-6ggNz8amdmDQZ28R8kS2IX60E5UNUhl757LpptQIH7HsmxciQaccNfEiRdRfzUmSEKgm0AY-WI/s320/IMG_4154.JPG" width="240" /></a></div>
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">This is not
comfortable to think about the week after Christmas. We prefer to
keep the cuddly baby. Who wouldn't?</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">But when we pack him away, don't we want to know if it mattered at all? Doesn't something nudge us to wonder if there's a point beyond shiny paper and jingling bells? And even if we're Christians who do believe there is, is there anything in our lives that demonstrates we know the grown </span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; text-align: center;">up Jesus? That we've looked deeply at the aftermath for that baby and we've signed on to what it means? </span><br />
<br />
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">So let's move
into it in the coming year. What happens next? What does Christmas
move into? Does what happens to baby Jesus have anything to say about
what should happen to us? Let's discover that together in 2016. I'd
love to hear your discoveries.</span></span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03774267389873705088noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-149833790792062928.post-10255087271657737802015-12-21T08:00:00.000-06:002015-12-21T08:00:00.062-06:00Th First Christmas Parade<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgrWIfKUW-jwJrpdnknVUQOUAHgCcioQKWs0RCI5YNXLDevSYUwEdXFjAXnT-z_J_ldsrvQwkAfNrpgEBWWHvtaRBT5c2bt5BwNTKDL5_Yp6fBEULoTEZ_rrIxUsqaPoi-BD3iQv11BfH0/s1600/IMG_0595.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgrWIfKUW-jwJrpdnknVUQOUAHgCcioQKWs0RCI5YNXLDevSYUwEdXFjAXnT-z_J_ldsrvQwkAfNrpgEBWWHvtaRBT5c2bt5BwNTKDL5_Yp6fBEULoTEZ_rrIxUsqaPoi-BD3iQv11BfH0/s640/IMG_0595.JPG" width="478" /></a></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">If I had the funds and the electrical
ingenuity, mine would be one of those houses that can be seen from
outer space at Christmastime. I love the lights the most. The bigger
and crazier the display, the more I want to drive by it. Light
displays are my guilty Christmas pleasure.</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">But maybe it shouldn't be so guilty.
God doesn't seem to find unsparing celebration problematic at all,
when the celebration is about Him.</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEicNb7yxdWa_UCVsCLBi6iQ9w4kTHRJpi64sKKOyMopKKBn48wd-fkQFPp7-wFGF2ngRdBh2vNuWJ431I3WA1W-yBjEsL58IV4ucPPHNl5grV09Gh-_QN23Ya4GNp047a41f1jRRVIMxSw/s1600/IMG_4173.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEicNb7yxdWa_UCVsCLBi6iQ9w4kTHRJpi64sKKOyMopKKBn48wd-fkQFPp7-wFGF2ngRdBh2vNuWJ431I3WA1W-yBjEsL58IV4ucPPHNl5grV09Gh-_QN23Ya4GNp047a41f1jRRVIMxSw/s400/IMG_4173.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">In 2 Samuel, David celebrates the
return of the ark of the covenant. He celebrates jubilantly, making
sacrifices and dancing in the streets before God's ark. It's a
vibrant parade, and David is the grand marshall. His wife doesn't
appreciate the dance, and the Bible says she despises him in her
heart for his undignified display. It's a drama-filled story, but
what does it have to do with Christmas? (<a href="https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=2+Samuel+6.12-19&version=NLT">Here</a> is the story, if you would like to read it.)</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The ark represented God's presence with
His people. It held His covenant to be their God and guide them. When
Exodus says a mercy seat covers the ark, it literally means
“atonement seat.” Here, God met his people to broker
reconciliation. For the Israelites, being without the ark meant being
without an approachable God. Now, they felt they were bringing God's
presence back. David had reason to celebrate.</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Christmas celebrates the place where
God met with His people to reconcile finally, completely, with full
atonement. </span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><i><b>In His birth, Jesus provided a new and eternal mercy
seat—Himself. Instead of an ark, a stable cradled a new covenant.</b></i></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />We have good reason to celebrate,
and to celebrate wildly. David's rapturous dance before the Ark
poured from his adoration of God. It sprung out of his gratitude that
God allowed his presence to be with His people.
</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Certainly our Christmas celebrations
should be equally full of crazy, abundant gratitude. Our celebrations
should “Make your faithfulness known through all generations” and
“declare that your love stands firm forever” (Psalm 891-2).
Letting something be known, making a declaration, dancing in the
streets—these are all unabashed actions. It's OK—it's good—to
make a big deal out of the fact that Jesus declared his presence
among people with a cry in a manger.
</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">There is no room in the season for a
Michal who shakes her head at the joy and mutters, “Why so much?”</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">So how do we know when the big deal is
about us and when is it about Jesus? We know the same way David did.
When we are decorating trees or baking cookies out of the gratitude
in our hearts that God is with us—we are celebrating like David.
When we do it because we're supposed to or we want to impress
someone, we're just having a holiday.
</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><i>When we're staring at the twinkling
lights and reminding God (and ourselves) that we want to be all in in
this new covenant, we're celebrating like David. </i></span>When we're thinking
instead about all the blacked-out spaces on our calendar, we're
enduring a season.
</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhnHMaj11cytaaZblynUj5BifSVNAiGZik06yaZd4fwvLEh6cE3pHVyFIRmHvMhg20nES5PJBjI3EVyGvBfyK1bH401iwc1zaKs4xK9lPgwkyOwG9M6MeEzs4qwxFUC2qYBhF1PiFRf_58/s1600/IMG_0566.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhnHMaj11cytaaZblynUj5BifSVNAiGZik06yaZd4fwvLEh6cE3pHVyFIRmHvMhg20nES5PJBjI3EVyGvBfyK1bH401iwc1zaKs4xK9lPgwkyOwG9M6MeEzs4qwxFUC2qYBhF1PiFRf_58/s400/IMG_0566.JPG" width="298" /></a><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">When we're giving gladly to those we
love, and to strangers who need it most, we're celebrating like
David. When we spend money we don't have on people who don't need it,
we're following customs rather than Jesus.</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">And when we're judging other peoples'
celebrations— we're being Michal. We're pretending to enjoy the
holiday, but we're not celebrating Emmanuel. God with us.</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Bright lights aren't the point of
Christmas; they're a nice byproduct. When I can watch their colors
arc across the darkness of a December night, I think of the Light of
the World who arced across our darkness to bring His presence and
mercy. I may even dance a little.</span></div>
<br />
<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03774267389873705088noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-149833790792062928.post-63384433459351294802015-12-07T08:00:00.000-06:002015-12-07T08:00:05.185-06:00Tech-free Christmas?<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;">
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center; text-decoration: none;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhEhzOE39lttTiDAsZatpCOXew1xspTe10TOQbKsj3U8jMF9_ZK-BUE_79TBVVt0VqxmX9tE4MNySrIy4Iytu5iiugYarfoWIspoYrUSmezwNtMsR_Z6T3JzMsj_uwnd2GKq6K4yOwebpc/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-09-23+at+8.24.59+AM.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="426" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhEhzOE39lttTiDAsZatpCOXew1xspTe10TOQbKsj3U8jMF9_ZK-BUE_79TBVVt0VqxmX9tE4MNySrIy4Iytu5iiugYarfoWIspoYrUSmezwNtMsR_Z6T3JzMsj_uwnd2GKq6K4yOwebpc/s640/Screen+Shot+2014-09-23+at+8.24.59+AM.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
<div style="text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">In a
<strike>terrifying</strike> fascinating study recently, researchers asked people aged
18-77 to spend fifteen minutes alone. Completely alone. No cell
phones, trivia crack, media, or sensory input of any kind. Over half
the participants chose to give themselves electric shocks as a
distraction, shocks they had previously said they would pay to avoid,
rather than spend this period of time completely without outside
input. </span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Fifteen minutes. I wish I had read this in the Onion, but I
did not.</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">This is
incomprehensible to an introvert like me. </span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">The average
teen spends as much time in front of a screen as he would at a full
time job. </span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">So by now
perhaps you're thinking what I'm about to say--December is an ideal
time to release your family from this technological tyranny. This
Christmas, how about a technology black out? Or at least, a grey out.
Close enough.</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgkAi4Zyh5xmd6f3-YXiaOtbz9m6MXx9OAuO4vcdkhPvJzl8X27eNBVqd2aBxbK9DbkX-LwvEP35ENmm9s_sg0fIvJdMhH8lgCgOsIb75grAtGJsK1PeGhgqprl8w4d1JVVMXBV6pCp_b4/s1600/IMG_0037.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgkAi4Zyh5xmd6f3-YXiaOtbz9m6MXx9OAuO4vcdkhPvJzl8X27eNBVqd2aBxbK9DbkX-LwvEP35ENmm9s_sg0fIvJdMhH8lgCgOsIb75grAtGJsK1PeGhgqprl8w4d1JVVMXBV6pCp_b4/s400/IMG_0037.JPG" width="300" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Something so wrong but so right about this.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">Don't
worry--no way no how I am going to tell you not to shop online.
That's just crazy talk. I could not survive Christmas without
shopping online. It is the best invention ever in the history of
history. This is a sanity-saver, so go ahead and take it. In
moderation. </span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">But maybe
December is a month for taking an electronic break, if not a fast.
During our <i>7</i> experiment this summer, we were supposed to eliminate
seven forms of media from our lives for a month. I chose facebook,
online puzzles and trivia games, non-work-related articles,
pinterest, snapchat, and movies. While I missed those things, I found
it restful. I found it peaceful. I found I got a lot more work done.
And, I have carried some of those habits into the following months. </span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Christmastime
is the ideal time to revisit slowing down electronically. Tweeting,
buzzing, and whirring are not sounds you want to hear while roasting
chestnuts by the open fire, anyway. It's a time we want to talk about peace on earth, so why not talk about peace inside our own heads, peace from
the incessant feeling that we need to be available, accessible,
responding at all times to every input? </span></span></div>
<div style="text-decoration: none;">
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-align: center;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></span></div>
<blockquote class="tr_bq" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="background-color: #d9ead3; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i><b><span style="font-size: large;">It's a time we want to talk about peace on earth, so why not talk about peace inside our own heads? <a href="http://twitter.com/home/?status=%20It%27s%20a%20time%20we%20want%20to%20talk%20about%20peace%20on%20earth,%20so%20why%20not%20talk%20about%20peace%20inside%20our%20own%20heads?%20via@JillMarieRichar%C2%A0" target="_blank"> [tweet this].</a></span></b></i></span></blockquote>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
</div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Peace that we could use to connect more closely with our people and our God. That's a peace on earth we all
could use.</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">So what can we
do to take back our digital lives during December? And, can these
habits carry through? </span></span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Here are some
options if you, too, think this sounds appealing.</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<h3 style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Create some
limits. </span></span></h3>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Did you know most Silicon Valley parents strictly limit their
kids' time on technology? That Steve Jobs was a low tech parent? They
know better than anyone the talent tech has for sucking us in and
draining us dry. They use safeguards. Why shouldn't we? </span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Create some
zones that are going to be tech free for the month of December.
Mealtimes. An hour before bedtime. Homework time. An hour after
school. The car. (Hey, we've had our best discussion in the car. This
does not happen when Angry Birds and videos are playing in the
backseat.) Whatever works for your family. Agree that the phones,
tablets, etc go down for that time. On penalty of death by battery
drain. Parents—<i><b>this applies to you</b></i>. Tech addiction is not confined
to the young.</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<h3 style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-size: large;">Declare a
Fast.</span> </span></span></h3>
<div style="font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">Determine some media that is going to be put down for the
entire month. Trust me—you will feel freer. You will find time
where you didn't know it existed. Choose some of the ones I mentioned
above or choose something that works better for yourself. Choose
something that's going to be <i>felt</i>. (Ex: I don't watch TV, so giving
that up would not have been a challenge.) Let family members choose
what will make them the most free. </span></span></div>
<div style="font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">Make a competition out of it, if
that's the way you roll. Anyone caught cheating has to put a dollar
in the jar. At the end of the month, donate the money or let the
“winner” for the month choose a fun thing to spend it on. </span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Just don't
choose to eliminate Christmas movies. Because Charlie Brown
Christmas.</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<h3 style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi-3Ztu6xhqfM2Giv2Sf_buJyZsILm5CJfeQW0GNHXQ3JYPX34-2IXnxgetzYF2j9TTgZC9RQuxqzR-cWmM_vJAGy-ETfgmgzmwltsddd0VJHj8uDLRX-pXPe5RQsRwbgZ4tsKndCw2wug/s1600/IMG_2461.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi-3Ztu6xhqfM2Giv2Sf_buJyZsILm5CJfeQW0GNHXQ3JYPX34-2IXnxgetzYF2j9TTgZC9RQuxqzR-cWmM_vJAGy-ETfgmgzmwltsddd0VJHj8uDLRX-pXPe5RQsRwbgZ4tsKndCw2wug/s320/IMG_2461.JPG" width="239" /></a><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Plan
alternatives. </span></h3>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">Keep a list of things you can do instead of going on
Facebook or Youtube. Snowball fight. Library trip. Reading.
Volunteering. Have a real discussion, bake Christmas
cookies, address cards. Have board games, puzzles, or art supplies
set up in a central location. If there are choices that are ready to
go, the mindless electronic siren call won't be as alluring. </span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<h3 style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black; font-size: large;">Make a new
habit. </span></span></h3>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">Create a go-to choice for those times you feel yourself moving
toward that Facebook tab. Pray for the person you wanted to check on
instead. Think of a kind act to do for someone. Text someone
something encouraging. Do something to be the hands and feet of Jesus
during his holiday season. (Don't go eat a Christmas cookie. Bad new
habit. Trust me on this one.) </span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<br />
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">And have a
wonderfully quiet December.</span></span><br />
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03774267389873705088noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-149833790792062928.post-3208287478683325622015-11-30T08:00:00.000-06:002015-11-30T08:00:06.537-06:00Spending Ourselves<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhXBpRA3qnj53xeZSfNzFMQxFs_Ixh05wyRmY0658v7zOWIMyHaFZuD80lSuOZv4t9GIWAxnkPrzMIwp8GxRbRIlpoKhmQpTTSR4qBaDuR_1WIAjmTh1q95Rdc6z-mr3k9lSTare_oEwRo/s1600/IMG_0060.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhXBpRA3qnj53xeZSfNzFMQxFs_Ixh05wyRmY0658v7zOWIMyHaFZuD80lSuOZv4t9GIWAxnkPrzMIwp8GxRbRIlpoKhmQpTTSR4qBaDuR_1WIAjmTh1q95Rdc6z-mr3k9lSTare_oEwRo/s400/IMG_0060.JPG" width="265" /></a><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">A few
Christmases ago, we we ate coconut, spaghetti, and pineapple for
Christmas dinner. It was a mission trip to Costa Rica, so that should
also explain the Christmas morning kayak trip through mangroves. (And
the Christmas Eve trip to the turtle sanctuary.) We left Christmas
gifts at home under the tree, with three cats wondering if
perhaps they should do the job of unwrapping. </span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">We also
decided to do Christmas differently when we got home. In light of the
fact that we were going to work with Nicaraguan immigrants who didn't
have the means to buy uniforms so their kids could go to school, we
wondered how we would feel about coming home and opening a room full
of gifts we didn't need. Wisely, we figured we would not
feel so great about that. So we planned an alternative.</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">For that year,
we agreed that all presents had to be made, not bought. I made photo
albums for everyone. Bought groupons for classes to take together.
Even finished those T-shirt quilts I'd been saving T-shirts for for
approximately twenty years. (OK, I did not technically finish them.
Some of them may have actually been a wrapped up box of fabric
squares that were going to be a quilt someday when they grew up. But
at least I got started.) </span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">You know what?
Our kids loved them. They spent more time poring over those photo
albums than they had ever spent fascinated by a new device or game.
They appreciated the time and love that went into those gifts. Every
year since then I've thought, maybe we should do that again. And
maybe we will.</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">One of the
biggest ways we can slow down our holidays is to slow down
financially. Slow down by rethinking what needs to be bought and who
needs to be impressed. I know, making gifts can take time. Feeling we have to make Pinterest-level gifts for everyone on our
list does not induce feelings of peace but rather heart palpitations.
</span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">But we don't
have to. “Not bought” does not equal intricately hand crafted
marvels. It means creativity on another level entirely. </span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Here are
a few easy ideas to get that creativity flowing.</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<h3 style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black; font-size: large;">Cut the list. </span></span></h3>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjZNsF2uzBy70k0GS0U7nafe9X9BKJ6L6hriqcarPzvv1dqKEHlNNTsVq-BY_pKaSBuWYFm0t5J5UZ6PBFeNhxZ122uP8DuIMGDM-PNbjLC_VKaqKD2OB17kDda8DSVDaxXZVFr8D4wE58/s1600/IMG_4240.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjZNsF2uzBy70k0GS0U7nafe9X9BKJ6L6hriqcarPzvv1dqKEHlNNTsVq-BY_pKaSBuWYFm0t5J5UZ6PBFeNhxZ122uP8DuIMGDM-PNbjLC_VKaqKD2OB17kDda8DSVDaxXZVFr8D4wE58/s320/IMG_4240.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">I'm not kidding on this. Who told you you had to give gifts to your
mail carrier, the person three cubicles down at work, your
great-niece, and your best friend's dog? There are no rules here
unless you make them. A sincere note of appreciation is enough.
(Although the dog will probably eat a note, so maybe not.) </span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">A card
mentioning something you've noticed about that person. A list of
reasons you'r glad you know her. A Bible verse that makes you think
of him. </span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Really,
affirming words, if they're sincere, last longer than any gift.
(Except fruitcake and bad knick-knacks. Those lasts forever.) </span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Exchange names among family
members rather than trying to buy for everyone. Agree to make a
charitable donation instead of give gifts. Minimize your list and
take it from there.</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<h3 style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Mass produce. </span></span></h3>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Can fifteen people on your list all receive the same loaf of homemade
bread and a jar of jam? Yes, they can. Done. Stop stressing over
making each one different. No one will remember. Believe me on this. (And if you still have fifteen non-family members on your list, see tip #1.)</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<h3 style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-size: large;">Go with you
gifts.</span> </span></span></h3>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEienI4S-02yHK9gN_m2E-NbI5HLRDXWSNIFxIFCOwkJmtl7abxSGpuTRW4iMQVHZPc65WPU4-5XasXjJ0WVUlQdzQH1Ojm4s5TvfMuJPuJYxtg9pO_hmG_Zw5nni9HynRSMCrexZFhJ3T0/s1600/IMG_4257.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEienI4S-02yHK9gN_m2E-NbI5HLRDXWSNIFxIFCOwkJmtl7abxSGpuTRW4iMQVHZPc65WPU4-5XasXjJ0WVUlQdzQH1Ojm4s5TvfMuJPuJYxtg9pO_hmG_Zw5nni9HynRSMCrexZFhJ3T0/s400/IMG_4257.JPG" width="300" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">A handmade gift I greatly appreciated :) </td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">I can scrapbook. Maybe the thought would give you a migraine.
Maybe, though, you'd be a whiz at uploading those same photos to
Walgreens and making a quick photo album. Totally counts as homemade.
Go for it. Go with whatever God-given abilities and passions were
assigned to you. What do you love to do or create? How can that translate into giving? God gave us passions and gifts so we could bless others. Yours included, whatever they are.</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<h3 style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black; font-size: large;">Gift someone
with time. </span></span></h3>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">A lunch together. A class together. A road trip together.
Anything that ends with together. T-I-M-E spells love in our culture.
Gift it lavishly. It will be the most treasured thing under the tree.
</span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">So take this
as a challenge. A Don't-Step-Foot-in-a-Store challenge. Slow down
financially this year by making gifts, creating memories,
appreciating tangibly, and gifting with time. Forget Black Friday.
Seriously, Black Friday is like an abusive relationship anyway. You
know it's bad for you, but you keep going back. Break it off now. </span>
</span></div>
<div style="text-decoration: none;">
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<blockquote class="tr_bq" style="text-align: center;">
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="background-color: #f4cccc;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><i>Black Friday is an abusive relationship anyway.</i></b></span> <b style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i>Break it off now.</i></b></span></span></blockquote>
</blockquote>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
</div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">If you find
you ned to do something else with all the money you save, there are
some good options listed below.* </span></span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Buy something someone else desperately needs given
in the name of someone who doesn't really need anything. Because
nothing says “I love you,” like “I bought a goat in your name.”
I'm serious, actually. It's true.</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">We're
celebrating the One who had everything and gave everything so we
could have anything. He didn't spend money to woo us--he spent
himself. Want to slow down financially this Christmas and stop the
spending crazy train? Give of yourself. Simply, not in a “I can
make cuter and more personal handmade gifts than you can buy” sort
of giving. Because we all know those people, and they are annoying. </span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">In small steps
or big ways, start spending yourself this year rather than your
credit cards. </span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">In what ways
do you try to focus on people rather than presents? Do you have great
go-to's for simple gifts? Please share! </span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">*<a href="http://seedlivelihood.org/files/2014/11/ICCM_Catalog_Web.pdf">SEED</a></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><a href="http://www.samaritanspurse.org/our-ministry/gift-catalog-2014/">Samaritan's Purse</a></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><a href="https://www.feedprojects.com/gifts">FEED</a></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><a href="http://www.heifer.org/gift-catalog/index.html">Heifer International</a></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">Prison Fellowship/<a href="http://www.prisonfellowship.org/about/angel-tree/">Project Angel Tree</a></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03774267389873705088noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-149833790792062928.post-69943230132194495602015-11-23T08:00:00.000-06:002015-11-23T08:00:07.765-06:00Leave Room: When the Christmas Calendar Is Too Much<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi9wzO0F_bv7eqpzBIC6SKHo0gqErzLIHzgGgayKszg9Cmx-GMVqF9RfbbTq2Umymc5Mj5j0hARrS8NxpwJ2V5cIxt_VJ5ZvVMiOGb6g77q_o3XBnENwiIRObcVvRpF-th-jecmX4fewFE/s1600/Screen+Shot+2015-09-28+at+9.07.06+AM.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi9wzO0F_bv7eqpzBIC6SKHo0gqErzLIHzgGgayKszg9Cmx-GMVqF9RfbbTq2Umymc5Mj5j0hARrS8NxpwJ2V5cIxt_VJ5ZvVMiOGb6g77q_o3XBnENwiIRObcVvRpF-th-jecmX4fewFE/s400/Screen+Shot+2015-09-28+at+9.07.06+AM.png" width="341" /></a></div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">I have a
calendar on my phone, a calendar on my computer, a calendar on my
website, and a calendar on my wall. You'd think I would never miss an
appointment. You'd think I would never double book anything. You'd
think I went backpacking on a yak in Siberia. No, you wouldn't, but
that last guess would be equally as accurate as the first two. </span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I still screw
up the calendar.</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">And now it's
December. The month when we routinely add 314 things to our calendar
that we will feel guilty about never being able to do. Because that's
what Christmas is all about, Charlie Brown.</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">We are
calendarically challenged (your new word of the month), and we need
to slow it down for the holidays, not ramp it up. That's not to say we
turn down social occasions and stay at home all month with our
twinkling lights. Socializing is good, even for us flaming
introverts. But let's slow it down to the right kind of socializing.</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<h3 style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Prioritize. </span></span></h3>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">What really “makes” Christmas for your family members? Cutting
down the tree? Christmas Eve service? Eating baking cookies? Listen
to every person, and then schedule in the things that matter the most
to each person. Yes, schedule in baking cookies. Or it will happen at
the last minute because you have to squeeze it in and you're
frazzled. This is not the time to be adjacent to knives, blenders,
and hot ovens.</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Everyone feels
listened to, and the important things happen.</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<h3 style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black; font-size: large;">Add in slowly. </span></span></h3>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">Start to pick other things you want or have to do. School programs.
Worship time. Visits with people from out of town. Look at each time-sucker holiday event and ask your self a couple questions. Is this
something I really want to do? Is it something that means a lot to
another person? Is it something that shows my gratitude toward God?
Is it something I have to do or risk unemployment? If the answer is
yes, put it on the calendar. When something new comes up, go through
the mental process of asking these questions before you make an
automatic yes. (Or no.) </span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<h3 style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black; font-size: large;">Protect
downtime. </span></span></h3>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">Keep free time free. Resist the urge to fill it in with
“just one things more.” Yes, it might fit. Yes, you might enjoy
it. But it will also stress you out to look at a full calendar and
feel like you cannot escape its selfish demands. Guard those
non-colored areas on your calendar as if they are gold. They are.
They are your golden time to do nothing, enjoy one another, read
together, or go on a drive in your pajamas to see lights. These are
important activities. If you decide at the time that you can and want
to do that one extra thing? Then do it. But you'll be free to choose.
This is the only time I'm going to give you a pass on not committing
to an event. Treasure it. </span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<h3 style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black; font-size: large;">Celebrate
weirdly. </span></span></h3>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">My family usually gets together after Christmas sometime.
The crazy is over, the gifts are half price, and everyone is sick of
coma inducing amounts of food so there's no need to cook lavishly.
Choose a not-normal time for those things you'd like to do but can't
fit in. A breakfast party instead of a dinner one. Invite families to
volunteer together. Have friends with little ones over for hot
chocolate, pj's, and a favorite Christmas story time after dinner and
before bed. It's short and sweet and fun. Create an event at a time
no one thinks of, and since you created it, you get to make the
rules. Rules are, you don't have to set up a photo booth and handmade
placecards. Unless you want to. </span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<h3 style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black; font-size: large;">Leave Room.</span></span></h3>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">Sometimes,
interruptions to your calendar are good. The shepherds' willingness to
listen to the angels and take off for the stable meant only good
things. I'm not sure how the Christmas story would have gone down if
they had said to the angelic host, “You know, we're kind of
stressed right now. Can we take a pass on the newborn king thing?
Maybe next month, when things slow down.” Well, I am sure. God
would have found someone else to do their job. And they would have
missed out. </span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<br />
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">But divine
interruptions can't happen with a blacked-out calendar. Leave room.
Leave room for His presence to surprise you on a starry night. </span></span>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03774267389873705088noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-149833790792062928.post-31134967674476394952015-11-16T08:00:00.000-06:002015-11-16T08:00:03.332-06:00Less Is More Christmas<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEglpio9oPsvHzcmbOpIr7WmE4Ip6U6dbS3hABLfsDEUaBUZLwfu8T_1xZbobJnY7L3KSfHpOmvnOoQNi9gojmWbUYOdC_s-4ggTYSo8Lx4dQOe0thrBZjWyk-kBun4bxGFrbxfZjZDKHM4/s1600/P1040083.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEglpio9oPsvHzcmbOpIr7WmE4Ip6U6dbS3hABLfsDEUaBUZLwfu8T_1xZbobJnY7L3KSfHpOmvnOoQNi9gojmWbUYOdC_s-4ggTYSo8Lx4dQOe0thrBZjWyk-kBun4bxGFrbxfZjZDKHM4/s400/P1040083.jpg" width="300" /></a><br />
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />Christmastime
is heeeere . . . yes, the warbling song stylings of the Peanuts
Christmas special are in my head. I love Christmastime. I also love
the Peanuts, so there is that. I know, it's early yet, but there is a
reason.</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Unabashedly, I
love it. I love the lights, the colors, the smells, the shiny
wrapping paper, the songs, the general kindness. I love everything
about Christmas.</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">Almost
everything. I do not love the craziness of trying to get it all done.
The last minute stress. The certainty that you have to get one more
thing for one more person because said person is going to get you
something and it will definitely be better than anything you can even
think of with your hot-chocolate-hangover brain. </span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i>Plus I do not
love “Santa Baby.” At all.</i></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">So I'm not
Ebeneezer Scrooge, and I'm not Buddy Hall (the guy who wanted his
Christmas lights to be seen from space). I'm just a Christmas lover.
And a realist.</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Being a
realist, I want to take the best of Christmas and retain the reason
we celebrate it (hint—the “Christ” part) and meld them into a
holiday that celebrates peace on earth, not insanity in the dollar
section of Target.</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiWWKetZkcvP6jQMh1UonVj-MkKl2qXIascQL_hhvGJs2D4IjAP6Xktux1Ui1t08M0Sun45hDH5GOD_VW_McA5bEaExMftqPm6mcXSxUODYKV-0iF18GztrDDBItCF138aZ8H7w1qpNpzA/s1600/IMG_2197.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="298" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiWWKetZkcvP6jQMh1UonVj-MkKl2qXIascQL_hhvGJs2D4IjAP6Xktux1Ui1t08M0Sun45hDH5GOD_VW_McA5bEaExMftqPm6mcXSxUODYKV-0iF18GztrDDBItCF138aZ8H7w1qpNpzA/s400/IMG_2197.JPG" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Light parades? I'm there.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">So can we do
that? Can we do a less is more Christmas with all the things we love
and not the expectations we hate? I think so. </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">If you were following
my posts earlier this year, you know my daughter and I chose to go
through the book <a href="http://www.amazon.com/7-Experimental-Mutiny-Against-Excess/dp/1433672960/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1443218191&sr=8-1&keywords=seven+experimental+mutiny+excess">7: An Experimental Mutiny Against Excess</a> for the second tim</span></span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; text-align: center;">e. It's all about slowing down,
looking at what we have and what we need (don't need), and finding
ways to change our habits and expectations by employing some radical
life changes. (Start <a href="http://jill-theimperfectjourney.blogspot.com/2015/05/guilt-gales-and-going-where-wind-blows.html">here</a> to find out more about that great experiment.)</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEivp1fsW7vr1FYKXHJ1FWElPd8hT0_R94vKO1gXIVU0oaW0eGRWCq5q1szvO0lzdt4v4nUXug3gJvcDLcKc2Y0b346L4VHDk4EtZpCT8buJ8vgy4s0z42TdteGZ4oEJKBiGAtm6tsCuoLI/s1600/IMG_2345.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEivp1fsW7vr1FYKXHJ1FWElPd8hT0_R94vKO1gXIVU0oaW0eGRWCq5q1szvO0lzdt4v4nUXug3gJvcDLcKc2Y0b346L4VHDk4EtZpCT8buJ8vgy4s0z42TdteGZ4oEJKBiGAtm6tsCuoLI/s320/IMG_2345.jpg" width="239" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Love the MSI Christmas decorations</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">We didn't
finish the experiment at that time. We did practice loosening the
chains of food, clothing, and media before we declared a break for a
while. Some of the things we learned, as well as some of the thing
I've learned being both a mom and a pastor
during Christmas (now that's a double whammy right there), can
illuminate the question: How do we slow down and do less while
celebrating the season in the ways we love?</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">So we're going
to go through a few ways to do that this next month. Slowing down
financially, electronically, calendarally (Yes, I did make that word
up), and spiritually. Stay tuned. I think you're going to like it. </span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<br />
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">In the
meantime, here's a quick peek at some of the ways I've already found
online.
<a href="https://www.pinterest.com/jimari/all-stressed-up-holiday-hospitality/">https://www.pinterest.com/jimari/all-stressed-up-holiday-hospitality/</a>
I hope some of them sound fun and useful for you as you enter the
happiest/craziest/holiest time of the year.</span></span><br />
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">We'll start with the calendar next week. I'd love to hear your ideas, too.</span></span><br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<br />
<br />
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03774267389873705088noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-149833790792062928.post-2936770050688620032015-11-09T08:00:00.000-06:002015-11-09T08:00:03.458-06:00Rocks, Rails, and The Bible--They're All Hard<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg0eaBX4aS1QGGCSYlHO7McJCD6FvuBI3Y9bjhV0LXlaXO7eyIUrCInmQEw22crfBufiBcAhp3minxk-qhlVHwh8qpF7kdWJQ7iprb6Q6axsYt4Ky_nDn9_rP3ZMxsCekApWkTC43XMQWk/s1600/IMG_0650.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg0eaBX4aS1QGGCSYlHO7McJCD6FvuBI3Y9bjhV0LXlaXO7eyIUrCInmQEw22crfBufiBcAhp3minxk-qhlVHwh8qpF7kdWJQ7iprb6Q6axsYt4Ky_nDn9_rP3ZMxsCekApWkTC43XMQWk/s320/IMG_0650.JPG" width="425" /></a><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: transparent; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;">As
you read last week, I've had some health challenges in the last year.
Or so. </span></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: transparent; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;"><br /></span></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: transparent; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;">Funny thing is, once approximately 27 doctors, 478 blood
tests, and 3500 random guesses/unsolicited advice/WebMd visits were
all involved? The answer was something no one expected. One of the
drugs I've been taking for eight years to keep my body from rejecting
my donor kidney was causing my body to reject basically everything else.
Like food.</span></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: transparent; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;"><br /></span></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="background: transparent;">Food
is important. I think I learned that in health class at some point.
But now I'm quite certain of it. Nutrients contained in food keep us
alive. And my body was having none of them. For a long time.</span></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="background: transparent;"><br /></span></span></span></div>
<div style="font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: transparent; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;">So . . . <i>something meant to make me healthy and well ended up poisoning me. </i>It
happens, to a select few.</span></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="background: transparent;"><br /></span></span></span></div>
<h3 style="font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: transparent; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;">Spiritual Poison</span></span></span></h3>
<div style="font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh9EJ0uceq7Mtv24Kb1zlxydqGskIV7ABdDRVNjWx5_Ohco-Rm53AmK_t_BYwozWQGf_wJK6yIPT55_dW5waLFtc0E8nydKSnj4xGbQ7gI2FUeawBmkUbPT5VKzWV3-QuXC1OTSwaXr_XQ/s1600/IMG_0664.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh9EJ0uceq7Mtv24Kb1zlxydqGskIV7ABdDRVNjWx5_Ohco-Rm53AmK_t_BYwozWQGf_wJK6yIPT55_dW5waLFtc0E8nydKSnj4xGbQ7gI2FUeawBmkUbPT5VKzWV3-QuXC1OTSwaXr_XQ/s320/IMG_0664.jpg" width="213" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Hard, hard rocks</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: transparent; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;">Spiritually,
I'm afraid it happens to many of us. I think automatically of the
Pharisees that Jesus confronted time and again. His basic message to
them? <i>You have a good foundation. You want to know how to please God.
But you've taken it so far from its purpose that you're poisoning
yourselves. And everyone else.</i></span></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="background: transparent;"><br /></span></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="background: transparent;">The
Pharisees had rules. Lots of them. They began well enough—with a
desire to obey and follow God. They began in Scripture. But they got
a tad out of hand. Anytime there are 613 rules for getting through
your day, things are a tad out of hand. </span></span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="background: transparent;"><br /></span></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="background: transparent;">My
medication began well. It was intended to keep my body from killing a
life-saving donor kidney. And it did that. But along the way, it
started killing me instead. That's a little out of hand. A bit of
straying from the original intent.</span></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="background: transparent;"><br /></span></span></span></div>
<div style="font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: transparent; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;">I
fear--no, I <i>know</i>--we've done that, too. We've looked at the
guardrails God set up for life as He intended and, instead of being
grateful for their life-saving capacity, we've used them to beat
others into anything but life. Too often, we've poisoned the body
with something that was supposed to help it.</span></span></span></div>
<div style="font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: transparent; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;"><br /></span></span></span></div>
<h3 style="font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: transparent; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;">Bedrock is Hard Stuff--Be Careful</span></span></span></h3>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="background: transparent;">We've
taken the basic moral bedrock and, instead of standing on it with
arms outstretched to heaven in gratitude, we've smacked peoples'
heads on it. Not always. Often Christians are awesomely gracious, and
I have been witness to that beauty so many times. But enough for some
to feel poisoned by the people God meant to be good news. This is not
good news. For anyone.</span></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="background: transparent;"><br /></span></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: #fff2cc; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;">Gratitude
</span><span style="background: transparent;">is November's watchword.</span></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="background: transparent;"><br /></span></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="background: transparent;"><span style="font-size: large;">The
way to respond to God's guardrails is with gratitude, not
self-righteousness.</span> </span></span></span></blockquote>
</div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjwnbp7MypcLcY78_vuNCjLSXS-0MNPSoEgCYazlUVa87wb7lnCrqdUq0Zmgqk9nogqLamU3PD_kUPyHl9YDNtROlcu0Qs1sgbYl35dFGxZl997UNVgT_cuLzGdvPgOgZQ5qeqKXGbY_8U/s1600/IMG_0662.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjwnbp7MypcLcY78_vuNCjLSXS-0MNPSoEgCYazlUVa87wb7lnCrqdUq0Zmgqk9nogqLamU3PD_kUPyHl9YDNtROlcu0Qs1sgbYl35dFGxZl997UNVgT_cuLzGdvPgOgZQ5qeqKXGbY_8U/s320/IMG_0662.JPG" width="213" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">And the beautiful life they give.<br />
When God does it his way.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="background: transparent;">I
am grateful for the chance to live with fewer consequences for my
dumb choices if I live by the rules. But I am not free to glibly
inform others that their consequences are their own dumb fault. I'm
not even free to decide that this is true. Only God can decide if an
effect is a result of some cause. It's not in my bandwidth. It's not
up to me to call a tsunami or an earthquake or AIDS God's judgment
because I don't get to be God. The complex nuances of
cause and effect in my own body turned out difficult enough to
navigate, let alone believing I can judge those effects on a cosmic
basis.</span></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="background: transparent;"><br /></span></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="background: transparent;">Gratitude
dictates that I fall on my knees in worship and then rise in service.
Not judgment. Gratitude that I have what is life-giving should make
me a life-giving conduit, not an arbiter of who gets to be in and who
is out. </span></span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="background: transparent;"><br /></span></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh6miIFU-uhghXnKSUkU-Tqdmj74bDBTWL9e7PV97m_2NRHqCf7bgLj-nuEGv1tmF_9o_qGjBQ8sfRtctIdVBiYRNpy44R2g-TLXTdZ7MEgd-850xf2lgbhlXaI3UQgr4e2GWC8HTKeFC4/s1600/IMG_0767.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh6miIFU-uhghXnKSUkU-Tqdmj74bDBTWL9e7PV97m_2NRHqCf7bgLj-nuEGv1tmF_9o_qGjBQ8sfRtctIdVBiYRNpy44R2g-TLXTdZ7MEgd-850xf2lgbhlXaI3UQgr4e2GWC8HTKeFC4/s320/IMG_0767.JPG" width="213" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br /></td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="background: transparent;"> Making
God's life-giving Word into something that poisons those it comes in
contact with is something for which we will surely answer. <a href="http://twitter.com/home/?status=%20MakingGod%27s%20life-giving%20Word%20into%20something%20that%20poisons%20those%20it%20comes%20incontact%20with%20is%20something%20for%20which%20we%20will%20surely%20answer.%20via@JillMarieRichar%C2%A0" target="_blank"> [tweet this].</a>The last
year and a half have taught me a great deal about turning something
good into a weapon rather than a balm. </span></span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="background-color: #d9d2e9;"><b> <span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Verdana, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 24px;">“I tell you, her sins—and they are many—have been forgiven, so she has shown me much love. But a person who is forgiven little shows only little love.” (Luke 7.47)</span></b></span></div>
<span style="background-color: white; font-size: 16px; line-height: 24px;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">(Even better, read the whole story from Jesus <a href="https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Luke+7%3A36-50&version=NLT">here</a>.)</span></span><br />
<br />
<br />
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">In
what ways can we use God's life-giving words to give life this week?
How can we guard ourselves from the opposite? Let's talk about it.</span></span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03774267389873705088noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-149833790792062928.post-82201958171067691012015-11-02T08:00:00.000-06:002015-11-02T08:00:07.025-06:00Too Whatever (Being Real, and Grateful, about Our Bodies) <div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhylBPdpNRjbfHbXvG2fsgpuyr-zhTfH4r9Qee1X0t4JTW0maKyB8WbF8g1w4zeH7xJU6jrJfz1g-RZT2aa8MGMJH_Pn1fdjTAWcqnxY38nkaOoec1J3ahJ2tL6A-0R1eRqL_dVrMU75FM/s1600/11986964_10153599491179771_7074401885451142710_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhylBPdpNRjbfHbXvG2fsgpuyr-zhTfH4r9Qee1X0t4JTW0maKyB8WbF8g1w4zeH7xJU6jrJfz1g-RZT2aa8MGMJH_Pn1fdjTAWcqnxY38nkaOoec1J3ahJ2tL6A-0R1eRqL_dVrMU75FM/s400/11986964_10153599491179771_7074401885451142710_n.jpg" width="400" /></a><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">It's
been a year. A year and a half, actually. Eighteen months since I
began a health odyssey that started as an innocent stomach bug and
ended much later. Well, it hasn't really ended, but I can see the finish
line from here. </span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<h3>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">Long Story Sort of Short</span></span></h3>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">The
stomach bug didn't end in 24 hours like it's MO says it should. It
didn't end at all. To summarize, for over a year, I could not eat
much, had constant abdominal pain, could not get up and do anything
for more than fifteen minutes before exhaustion set in, had a body
temperature like I was floating on an iceberg, and had to stay in
immediate proximity to a bathroom at all times. TMI? My friend, you
have no idea. I will never again underestimate the value of normal
bowels. Just saying. </span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I
lost over 50 pounds involuntarily. That's not as awesome as many
women assume. Because it was so fast and unhealthy, all the muscle
mass has gone bye-bye with the fat. Do you know there are muscles in
places you never even thought of that you <i>need</i> to function?
Like even vocal muscles? Yeah, truth.</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Why
am I inflicting this story on you, like you just got stuck in the DMV
line behind the old lady who wants to tell you her entire pitiful
health history, in graphic detail, just before getting a driver's
license you are quite certain she should not have, given that
history?*</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">There
is a point.</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">A
year and a half ago, I could not imagine uttering phrases like “I
really need to gain some weight.” A year and a half ago, I would
look in a mirror, or at a photograph, and think, “Eew. Look at that
fat stomach and those chubby short legs. I hate the way I look.” </span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I
knew this was wrong. I preach all the time about girls owning their
bodies and not being ashamed of them. But what we say and know to be
true and what we feel in our hearts are not always the same deal, are
they?</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">Now
I look at photos and think, “Eeew. I look like a poster for a 'Don't Do Meth, Kids' campaign.” </span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">My
arms and neck are scrawny; they look like I imagine my mom's would
have if she had lived to be 80. I am not 80. Or even orbiting in its
proximity. I have bags and creases the size of an elephant's under my
eyes as a result of of chronic dehydration. Half of my hair has gone
AWOL. And that famous thigh gap? Yeah, got that, too. It's not nearly
as glamorous as it's made out to be.</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhDFYYYzE0Jx08jTSj3I8u2TFxTNtqjvFEFK7Gb832IkFdykp7t7-1teS2Uo9IeckkDDVhisRrTNWQCiWp5QV7QcBLrj2v1q3SlKdE30EZU0O2AG9D8vQ5bFBuuhZA2wHX8U8uleA8GqjM/s1600/208675_1008562777949_1341343465_30026655_7571_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhDFYYYzE0Jx08jTSj3I8u2TFxTNtqjvFEFK7Gb832IkFdykp7t7-1teS2Uo9IeckkDDVhisRrTNWQCiWp5QV7QcBLrj2v1q3SlKdE30EZU0O2AG9D8vQ5bFBuuhZA2wHX8U8uleA8GqjM/s400/208675_1008562777949_1341343465_30026655_7571_n.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Before. </td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiyFSRr3WPgBC23UZN3NL_7OduKESpn3fhZYdee8M9GKPmWGesvis8hb__wWCrpqrBsVsZDQpX5fra7z6UUTHHajwVdZdCQBMViuPsxhF7Wrod5UsmOI3OaHoP3pQtQjNYbu0IGzPPwfGI/s1600/P1000437.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiyFSRr3WPgBC23UZN3NL_7OduKESpn3fhZYdee8M9GKPmWGesvis8hb__wWCrpqrBsVsZDQpX5fra7z6UUTHHajwVdZdCQBMViuPsxhF7Wrod5UsmOI3OaHoP3pQtQjNYbu0IGzPPwfGI/s400/P1000437.jpg" width="387" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Now. A picture i really hate. I give it to you.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<blockquote class="tr_bq" style="font-weight: normal; text-align: center; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Too
fat. Too skinny. Too fill in the blank. Whatever, people. </span></span> </blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq" style="text-align: center; text-decoration: none;">
<i style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>I am over
it.</b></i></blockquote>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"></span></span><br />
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<h3>
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Ten Seconds of Awesome</span></span></h3>
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">For
about ten seconds in the last eighteen months, I looked like we
always fantasize—exactly the right weight. Then the scales tipped
too far the other direction, and self-criticism set in again. And I
realized, how dumb is that? To only feel confident about how you look
for ten seconds of your life? What a waste of the other millions of
seconds.</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; text-align: center; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Is constant self-criticism really a good use of the time God gave me? <a href="http://twitter.com/home/?status=%20Is%20constant%20self-criticism%20really%20a%20good%20use%20of%20the%20time%20God%20gave%20me?%20via@JillMarieRichar%C2%A0" target="_blank"> [tweet this].</a> </span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; text-align: center; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; text-align: center; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Is a focus on the unattainable a colossal waste of what I can attain right now, today? <a href="http://twitter.com/home/?status=%20Is%20a%20focus%20on%20the%20unattainable%20a%20colossal%20waste%20of%20what%20I%20can%20attain%20right%20now,%20today?%20via@JillMarieRichar%C2%A0" target="_blank"> [tweet this].</a></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; text-align: center; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; text-align: center; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Do I care too much about what counts too little? <a href="http://twitter.com/home/?status=%20Do%20I%20care%20too%20much%20about%20what%20counts%20too%20little?%20via@JillMarieRichar%C2%A0" target="_blank"> [tweet this].</a></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Have I failed to be grateful for the amazing gift of a body that's alive, no matter what it looks like? Have I failed to be thankful for a <i>soul</i> that's alive?</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">So
you know what? I'm owning it. At least, I'm trying to. Let's be real,
here, I am a proud creature, as are most of us. I don't like looking
at photos of myself when I look far worse than I want. Yet I <i>want</i>
to want those photos. I <i>want </i>to own them. This is who I am,
this is what I look like, and this is where God has brought me. </span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">And
to deny that and be ashamed of seeing it, looking at it, letting
others see the truth and beauty of what it looks like to be
deconstructed and revived? Thats a worse kind of pride I don't want
to harbor. It's a pride that won't let others in because I only want
them to see the image I want to portray. It's not ministry--it's just
selfish. It's thinking so much about me I don't ever look away from
the selfie to see the ones who need me to be real for them.</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">I
want to spend November being grateful on the blog. You know, because,
Thanksgiving. </span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<h3>
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Grateful is Good</span></span></h3>
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Today,
I am grateful. I am grateful for where I am. I am grateful for what
I've learned. I am so grateful to be alive, to be getting healthy, and to
see an end to this long tale. I do NOT take for granted that I can
get up and have energy to do life anymore. </span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">A year and a half of
enforced nothingness has taught me gratitude for just about
everything my body can do and did do before without considering what
a miracle that is. I am grateful for <i>whatever</i> that body looks
like, in whatever stage it is, because it works. It functions. It is
capable of doing whatever it needs to do to be what God wants me to
be. I have been forcefully reminded that this is really all it needs
to be.</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-align: center; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="background-color: #fce5cd; font-size: large;">Grateful.
</span></span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">What
do you need to be? What are you not owning as yours, as something God
can and will use? Look at it. Take a picture. Whatever works. Say
thank you. Even if you don't really mean it just yet. Saying it
starts the work of meaning it. </span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /><br />
</span></div>
<br />
<br />
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">*
True funny/slightly terrifying story. I once had a woman hit my car
five times with her car door because she could not figure out that
she had parked too close to me to be able to get out of her car. (The
full parking job is a story unto itself.) She just kept hitting me,
perplexed as to why it would not open. I was Sitting. In. the Car.
She proceeded to get out of the car (after finally reparking, a half
dozen times), grab her walker, and get into line at the DMV. Jesus
hold us all if that lady actually got a renewal and is on the roads.</span></span></div>
<br />
<br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03774267389873705088noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-149833790792062928.post-46376774141701576152015-10-26T08:00:00.000-05:002015-10-26T10:44:06.487-05:00It's Your Party and I'll Come if I Want To<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; page-break-before: always; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: transparent; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;">I
am a party failure. True story. In this month of talking about
community, I've got to come clean. I cannot throw a party. Other than
unicorn/princess/Harry Potter themed birthday parties that have long
since seen their day. My baby is almost twenty. She is not so into
letting me plan gift bags with glitter tattoos and a rainbow cake
anymore. But at those kinds of parties—I was a boss. Just so you
know.</span></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; page-break-before: always; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: transparent; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;"><br /></span></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="background: transparent;">But
now? Friends, neighbors, coworkers—all those people you want to
have over and just kick back and have fun around the backyard fire?
Fail. I have them, and no one comes. </span></span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="background: transparent;"><br /></span></span></span></div>
<div style="text-decoration: none;">
<h3>
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: transparent; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;"><b><i>Party Fail</i></b></span></span></span></h3>
<div style="font-weight: normal;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: transparent; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;">I
once threw a surprise birthday party. And <i>No. One. Came.</i> Do you know
what it's like to sit around with a big tub of sour cream and onion
dip and and pretend to your spouse (the birthday-ee) that no, there
was just a good sale so you bought that industrial-sized cheetos bag
for only the two of you? I cannot even remember how I explained the
Happy Birthday banner. Whatever, people. It's been over 25 years; I
think we've moved on.</span></span></span></div>
</div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="background: transparent;"><br /></span></span></span></div>
<div style="font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: transparent; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;">But
it's not just me. See, I googled it this morning. There are <i>pages</i> of
stories of people who have thrown parties to which no one came.
Advice columns. Blogs. Humor essays. Ugly crying in latte essays. All
over the world, people throw parties and no one comes. I thought it
was just me. </span></span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="background: transparent;"><br /></span></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="background: transparent;">In
fact, it's endemic. </span></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="background: transparent;"><br /></span></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="background: transparent;">No
one RSVP's anymore because everyone is just planning to wait until
the day to see if they feel like it or not. </span></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj6Aet5M-Jy4yBAaxusc4FUtP0GLqqF0sfHSuU1eS8AAI9jDuWPVV9TqKKCdS9InUGp9QMaleCqGPb-J3A50S-AJixiB_7-jHLsqjrIphz-5N_y5S36-RhpabbXbvPU1D1kX2G_9cux350/s1600/images.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="272" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj6Aet5M-Jy4yBAaxusc4FUtP0GLqqF0sfHSuU1eS8AAI9jDuWPVV9TqKKCdS9InUGp9QMaleCqGPb-J3A50S-AJixiB_7-jHLsqjrIphz-5N_y5S36-RhpabbXbvPU1D1kX2G_9cux350/s400/images.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="background: transparent;"><br /></span></span></span></div>
<div style="font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: transparent; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;"><i>Guilty as charged. </i></span></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="background: transparent;"><br /></span></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="background: transparent;">And
the reality is, on the day, more often than not inertia sets in. No
matter how much you think you should go or you know you'd enjoy it,
the pull of not changing the status quo is too great. We don't go. We
find better things to do. We find nothing to do, which is often what
we need after a hard day/week/year. </span></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I am one of these people. I know
of what I speak.</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="background: transparent;"><br /></span></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="background: transparent;">But
while I talk about how important it is to create community, I have to
be honest, too. I am a community creating failure. And I know it's
not just me. Lots of us are feeling the same way. How do we create a
community in the midst of a culture that won't commit, needs downtime
like we need oxygen, and considers relationships as disposable as
hitting the “unfriend”button on facebook? How do we not just quit
when no one shows up to our lives?</span></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="background: transparent;"><br /></span></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="background: transparent;">I
don't know. If I did, I wouldn't be a party fail. But I have found
some interesting tips. I am terrible at most of the things experts
say to do, so there is that. Maybe some of these ideas will stick.
But honestly, I don't know. </span></span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="background: transparent;"><br /></span></span></span></div>
<h3 style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="background: transparent;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Timing
Is Everything</span></span></span></h3>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="background: transparent;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">In
her<a href="http://youinspireme.co.uk/3-tips-for-alleviating-no-one-wants-to-come-to-my-party-pain/"> blog</a>, Conrinna Gordon-Barnes writes, “In my experience, there’s
an optimal time frame between too lengthy notice and too short
notice. Experiment and find what works for the people you want to
invite.” In other words, my method of inviting people to come to an
event in approximately ten minutes probably isn't the best modus
operandi. Figure out what the magic window is for your people.
They'll still cancel or not RSVP, but you've set yourself up for a
better chance.</span></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="background: transparent;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></span></div>
<h3 style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="background: transparent;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Personal
Touch</span></span></span></h3>
<div style="font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: transparent; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I
hate rejection. I hate leaving people out. So I don't invite people
personally. I make blanket invitations. Those almost never work,
according to professionals (and according to all those would-be party
throwers crying into their drink of choice whose blogs I read). With
a blanket invite, people feel free, almost empowered, to not show up.
<i>Someone else will. It wasn't meant for me anyway. I'll come next
time.</i> Here's a big hurdle for me. I need to do better.</span></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="background: transparent;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></span></div>
<h3 style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="background: transparent;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Make
'Em Pay</span></span></span></h3>
<div style="font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: transparent; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;">Not
literally. But most experts tell us that having some kind of stake in
the commitment makes people keep their word. If someone commits to
bringing the flaming pumpkin dessert, he or she is not as likely to
flake out on you at the last minute because the ex-boyfriend is back
in town and maybe they'll get back together. That's good news for you
<i>and</i> for the dessert bringer. </span></span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="background: transparent;"><br /></span></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="background: transparent;">This
is hard for me, because I prefer low key, casual, come and go. If you
can you can, if you can't, no worries. But more often than not, can't
is what happens. </span></span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="background: transparent;"><br /></span></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="background: transparent;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I
don't know the answer. I really don't.</span></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="background: transparent;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></span></div>
<div style="text-decoration: none;">
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgjP1ZC4_y0BtVDgL9rU_CW_u3fvl5fhkkCXExIXSN3P2hwMOaYSRsFqR3r8kklj9COl9ihBTfEHGjBsnUMgQaGr34zzj0bVTEGclQctuZbRec0a5wVOUhVod5GKyw9ZVEXf2kS_fmRxJg/s1600/4195af4b62a929be022515ffdfb6190a.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgjP1ZC4_y0BtVDgL9rU_CW_u3fvl5fhkkCXExIXSN3P2hwMOaYSRsFqR3r8kklj9COl9ihBTfEHGjBsnUMgQaGr34zzj0bVTEGclQctuZbRec0a5wVOUhVod5GKyw9ZVEXf2kS_fmRxJg/s400/4195af4b62a929be022515ffdfb6190a.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: transparent; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;">But
I know this. <b><i>I need to be a better committer if I want this elusive
thing called community. <a href="http://twitter.com/home/?status=%20I%20need%20to%20be%20a%20better%20committer%20if%20I%20want%20this%20elusivething%20called%20community.%20via@JillMarieRichar%C2%A0" target="_blank"> [tweet this].</a></i></b> Maybe that's the real answer. Maybe it's not
learning how to throw a better shindig or understanding the exact
equation for maximum attendance. Maybe it's as simple as being a
committed friend. Being what I want to see. Because like I said, I am
<i style="font-weight: normal;">so</i> one of the guilty people. </span></span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="background: transparent;"><br /></span></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="background: transparent;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">And
the truth is, sometimes, we need to be. Sometimes, we do need to take
some stuff off our schedule and say no. But sometimes? I think we
overdo that.</span></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="background: transparent;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></span></div>
<blockquote class="tr_bq" style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="background: transparent;">The
late Chuck Colson <a href="http://www.christianitytoday.com/ct/2010/august/10.49.html?start=1">writes</a>, “The basic building blocks of society
simply erode without commitment. Any sensible society must address
this problem by educating people that commitment is the very essence
of human relationships. W</span></span>hen we refuse to
commit, we miss out on one of the great joys of life. When we obsess
over ourselves, we lose the meaning of life, which is to know and
serve God and love and serve our neighbors.”</span></span></blockquote>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"> If
I want to be a better community-maker, I need to serve. <a href="http://twitter.com/home/?status=%20IfI%20want%20to%20be%20a%20better%20community-maker,%20I%20need%20to%20serve.%20via@JillMarieRichar%C2%A0" target="_blank"> [tweet this].</a>Not
hors-d'oeurvres. People. I need to be the commitment I want to see.
Oh, that's scary. And uncomfortable. And opening myself up right now
to anyone who reads this and says, “Hmm. I can guilt her into
whatever I want at this point.” </span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<br />
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">But
scary is sometimes the best thing we need to move forward.</span></span><br />
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span>
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="background-color: #d0e0e3; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Do you have any answers for community building? Anything that's worked for you? Any failure stories you'd like to share (so I don't feel so alone)? Start the conversation below!</b></span></span><br />
<br /></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03774267389873705088noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-149833790792062928.post-70750651834041383172015-10-19T08:00:00.000-05:002015-10-19T08:00:05.343-05:00Getting Friendship Backward--What Really Goes First?<div style="background: rgb(255, 255, 255); border: 0px; font-family: arimo-1, arimo-2, sans-serif; font-size: 15.6px; line-height: 18px; margin-bottom: 15px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="background: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><strong style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: transparent; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Community is the word for October. In that spirit, I've invited a friend Andrea Stunz to guest blog today. She has a great message about community, friendship, and being totally honest with ourselves. I love it, and I'm sure you will, too.</strong></span></div>
<div style="background: rgb(255, 255, 255); border: 0px; font-family: arimo-1, arimo-2, sans-serif; font-size: 15.6px; line-height: 18px; margin-bottom: 15px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
<em style="background: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><strong style="background: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><br /></strong></em></div>
<div style="background: rgb(255, 255, 255); border: 0px; font-family: arimo-1, arimo-2, sans-serif; font-size: 15.6px; line-height: 18px; margin-bottom: 15px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
<em style="background: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><strong style="background: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Live in true devotion to one another, loving each other as sisters and brothers. Be first to honor others by putting them first. Romans 12:10 (The Voice)</strong></em></div>
<div style="background: rgb(255, 255, 255); border: 0px; font-family: arimo-1, arimo-2, sans-serif; font-size: 15.6px; line-height: 18px; margin-bottom: 15px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiIuxrjNzZGYrn-Xm-eeHB8b3n2d4JaOkV0D5eBQq7BAkZ5OwcI-P284bRtc3JUzJjVFF36Du4PaEhwh-f-XaFCZxKkHDe58yeqrQeFsj9TemzFtN0aR372QwxY0w3qFLFzaU-BgTLTtEc/s1600/IMG_3339.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiIuxrjNzZGYrn-Xm-eeHB8b3n2d4JaOkV0D5eBQq7BAkZ5OwcI-P284bRtc3JUzJjVFF36Du4PaEhwh-f-XaFCZxKkHDe58yeqrQeFsj9TemzFtN0aR372QwxY0w3qFLFzaU-BgTLTtEc/s320/IMG_3339.JPG" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Friends don't care how old you are.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
I’ve gotten it backwards for a whole lotta years. Not on purpose but out of just not knowing how to do it right. Not being taught. I do selfish very well. Too well. Don’t we all? I’m just shy of 50 years old and I think God may finally be getting through to me and helping me understand how this whole friend thing works.</div>
<blockquote style="background: url(https://s1.wp.com/wp-content/themes/pub/matala/images/blockquote.gif) 100% 0% no-repeat rgb(255, 255, 255); border: 0px; color: #644a3d; font-family: arimo-1, arimo-2, sans-serif; font-size: 18.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: 22px; margin: 0px 0px 0px 30px; padding: 5px; quotes: none; vertical-align: baseline;">
<div style="background: transparent; border: 0px; margin-bottom: 15px; padding: 15px; text-align: center; vertical-align: baseline;">
<em style="background: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><strong style="background: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">First, you have to be a friend. Then you get to have a friend.</strong></em></div>
</blockquote>
<div style="background: rgb(255, 255, 255); border: 0px; font-family: arimo-1, arimo-2, sans-serif; font-size: 15.6px; line-height: 18px; margin-bottom: 15px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
Ahhhhh….. soooo….. Well, I’ve been trying that out and guess what? It’s working!</div>
<div style="background: rgb(255, 255, 255); border: 0px; font-family: arimo-1, arimo-2, sans-serif; font-size: 15.6px; line-height: 18px; margin-bottom: 15px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
But it’s not easy for this control freak.</div>
<div style="background: rgb(255, 255, 255); border: 0px; font-family: arimo-1, arimo-2, sans-serif; font-size: 15.6px; line-height: 18px; margin-bottom: 15px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
I’m putting myself out there more and with a different outlook. I’m trying new things. I’m risking.<strong style="background: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">That’s the hardest part. Risk.</strong> Being vulnerable. Knowing that if I truly let myself be a friend to have a friend it might hurt at some point. Knowing that it will most definitely hurt at some point. I don’t like that part. The hardest part for me in all of this relationship business is being willing to be hurt. Because it will happen. Even by those who aren’t supposed to hurt me. They aren’t God. God is the only “person” who will never disappoint me.</div>
<blockquote style="background: url(https://s1.wp.com/wp-content/themes/pub/matala/images/blockquote.gif) 100% 0% no-repeat rgb(255, 255, 255); border: 0px; color: #644a3d; font-family: arimo-1, arimo-2, sans-serif; font-size: 18.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: 22px; margin: 0px 0px 0px 30px; padding: 5px; quotes: none; vertical-align: baseline;">
<div style="background: transparent; border: 0px; margin-bottom: 15px; padding: 15px; text-align: center; vertical-align: baseline;">
<em style="background: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><strong style="background: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">“To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. To love is to be vulnerable.” ~</strong></em><em style="background: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><strong style="background: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">C.S. Lewis</strong></em></div>
</blockquote>
<div style="background: rgb(255, 255, 255); border: 0px; font-family: arimo-1, arimo-2, sans-serif; font-size: 15.6px; line-height: 18px; margin-bottom: 15px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
Somewhere along the way I decided that risking heart exposure wasn’t worth the pain. What I’m finally learning is that risk is not always worth it but it is <em style="background: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">sometimes</em> worth it. Love is costly, but anything of value costs. <strong style="background: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Being willing to be broken is also being willing to accept redemption.</strong></div>
<div style="background: rgb(255, 255, 255); border: 0px; font-family: arimo-1, arimo-2, sans-serif; font-size: 15.6px; line-height: 18px; margin-bottom: 15px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
If I let myself be a friend and have a friend then it might just might turn out okay or even better than okay. It might actually be great!</div>
<div style="background: rgb(255, 255, 255); border: 0px; font-family: arimo-1, arimo-2, sans-serif; font-size: 15.6px; line-height: 18px; margin-bottom: 15px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjjnQI6kVam91xL-7tzHyGVy9M3n1rhm5Y0c8LIdMaum2oyuGg1zhqz24MOYSqUmctX7JUQB7pbnoa4qJerxCTBqfBcMLYfscJHHLRdPfV06w7bhoL2b4OP7I93ioTsYlmbtB9kp3psZXI/s1600/IMG_3337.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjjnQI6kVam91xL-7tzHyGVy9M3n1rhm5Y0c8LIdMaum2oyuGg1zhqz24MOYSqUmctX7JUQB7pbnoa4qJerxCTBqfBcMLYfscJHHLRdPfV06w7bhoL2b4OP7I93ioTsYlmbtB9kp3psZXI/s320/IMG_3337.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Or how crazy you are.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
The thing with friendship is that we can have a lot of them but not all of them have to be bff’s. If we follow the model of Jesus, he had a three “bff’s” in his inner circle. Three that he went all in with. Three that he shared his guts with. Then his circles broadened. As his circles broadened so did the amount of information he shared with them. Not because he didn’t want to but because those he would be sharing with couldn’t handle it or wouldn’t receive it.</div>
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I am coming to realize that those who can’t handle me don’t deserve me. That may sound harsh, but this control freak has to have <em style="background: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">some</em> boundaries. I can still love and share Jesus and share my life with everyone but I don’t have to share my guts with everyone. We’ve told our kids countless times that you don’t have to be friends with everyone but you do have to be friendly. I’ve got friendly down. I’m working on being a friend. Got trust issues? I do! My trust issues include trusting God enough to put people in my life whom I can trust. Then, the onus is on me that once he does that to not squander it. I have to trust and try. <strong style="background: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Once the loneliness gets lonely enough, we’ll either choose to move out of it or resolve to stay in it.</strong> I’m finally in the place where I’m choosing to move out of it.</div>
<div style="background: rgb(255, 255, 255); border: 0px; font-family: arimo-1, arimo-2, sans-serif; font-size: 15.6px; line-height: 18px; margin-bottom: 15px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
Relationships are messy and what I’m coming to learn (not having arrived just yet but learning) is that messy = living and living = messy. I’ve gone far too long without really living and then getting all upset because no one else was helping me live it. Ridiculous, right? But it’s true and ridiculous and I’m tired of not living. <strong style="background: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Life is so much better when it’s lived.</strong></div>
<div style="background: rgb(255, 255, 255); border: 0px; font-family: arimo-1, arimo-2, sans-serif; font-size: 15.6px; line-height: 18px; margin-bottom: 15px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
<em style="background: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><strong style="background: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">“In this world you will have trouble” (John <span class="aBn" style="background: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span class="aQJ" style="background: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">16:33</span></span>).</strong></em></div>
<blockquote style="background: url(https://s1.wp.com/wp-content/themes/pub/matala/images/blockquote.gif) 100% 0% no-repeat rgb(255, 255, 255); border: 0px; color: #644a3d; font-family: arimo-1, arimo-2, sans-serif; font-size: 18.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: 22px; margin: 0px 0px 0px 30px; padding: 5px; quotes: none; vertical-align: baseline;">
<div style="background: transparent; border: 0px; margin-bottom: 15px; padding: 15px; text-align: center; vertical-align: baseline;">
<em style="background: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><strong style="background: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">There will be strong and unfriendly winds that will make a mess of our lives. On those blustery days, the kindness, prayers, and simple-but-profound ministry of the presence of dear friends will be the anchor to our unraveling, the rescue to our storm.</strong></em><span style="background-color: transparent;"> </span><em style="background: transparent; border: 0px; font-size: 18.2px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><strong style="background: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"> ~Dr. Leslie Parrott</strong></em></div>
</blockquote>
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh2_Whc93WP-a_iq_WZ0h3qMzToz4b7HX0QbKOxj5O_YxuUbxoYq8SYUGT4ymJcuknwg9qMLRqcBdfkHNKcLcclOoCJLpWz5fk1DVUigpwYtI7SNjIusOOMI5q9FoQGfB4Sa7hDUGQIa0M/s1600/friends.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh2_Whc93WP-a_iq_WZ0h3qMzToz4b7HX0QbKOxj5O_YxuUbxoYq8SYUGT4ymJcuknwg9qMLRqcBdfkHNKcLcclOoCJLpWz5fk1DVUigpwYtI7SNjIusOOMI5q9FoQGfB4Sa7hDUGQIa0M/s400/friends.jpg" width="350" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
Those kinds of friends are few and far between. I have a few of those and they know my mess and love me anyway and come to my rescue. Some have known my mess and chosen not to love me and that hurts but there’s nothing I can do about that now. Somewhere along the way I got in my head that people were just supposed to know when I was hurting and miraculously come to my rescue. What I’m realizing now is that I have to let them in. I have to take the risk. The power of the lies of thinking I need control and not trusting because it hurts are a relationship killer. Somewhere along the way I got in my head that if I shared too much or exposed myself they wouldn’t stick around. But now I know that if they don’t stick around then one of us still has work to do. I can’t fix them but I can work on fixing me. I need to be careful and have some boundaries but isolation is not where it’s at.</div>
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<div style="background: transparent; border: 0px; margin-bottom: 15px; padding: 15px; text-align: center; vertical-align: baseline;">
<em style="background: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><strong style="background: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Remember we were meant to be in community. Don’t isolate yourself. Insulate your heart but don’t isolate your body. ~Patsy Clairmont</strong></em></div>
</blockquote>
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God has been faithful to show me the way. I’ve forced myself to become more involved in a few things at church – which really is not bad at all once I’m there. I’m purposely asking old friends and new friends to lunch or coffee and just letting whatever happens happen. It’s mostly been wonderful. Not easy and not without some anxiety and heart palpitations but wonderful. I also signed up to get some email tips from <a href="http://www.incourage.me/" style="background: transparent; border: 0px; color: #d8471d; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;">(in)Courage</a> on “how to be the friend you wished you had." God is lovingly but clearly telling me that I need to figure out how to be a friend before I can have a friend. I’m getting it. Slowly, but I am.</div>
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So in all of this, I’m still learning. I’m still growing. I have not arrived. I’m trying to be brave. I’m willing to risk. I think…</div>
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God help me. Amen.</div>
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~Andrea</div>
<blockquote style="background: url(https://s1.wp.com/wp-content/themes/pub/matala/images/blockquote.gif) 100% 0% no-repeat rgb(255, 255, 255); border: 0px; color: #644a3d; font-family: arimo-1, arimo-2, sans-serif; font-size: 18.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: 22px; margin: 0px 0px 0px 30px; padding: 5px; quotes: none; vertical-align: baseline;">
<div style="background: transparent; border: 0px; margin-bottom: 15px; padding: 15px; text-align: center; vertical-align: baseline;">
<em style="background: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><strong style="background: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">“I’ve learned that I still have a lot to learn.” ~Maya Angelou</strong></em></div>
</blockquote>
Andrea is:<span style="background-color: white; font-family: arimo-1, arimo-2, sans-serif; font-size: 15.6px; line-height: 18px;"> "A homemaker, a traveler, a seeker, a writer, a pilgrim. I love cooking and sharing good food with others who love good food. I take pictures that tell a story, my story, God’s story. An almost empty nester. A fellow struggler. A fellow stumbler. In need of God’s grace. Oh, and coffee. Grace and coffee. Then I’m good. Oh, and a sunrise. Grace, coffee and a sunrise. THEN I’m good. Oh, and my grandson. Grace, coffee, a sunrise and my grandson. … you get the picture. :) I have many favorite scriptures but my “go to” scripture which seems to encompass all I may be stumbling through or rejoicing in is always this: </span><em style="background: rgb(255, 255, 255); border: 0px; font-family: arimo-1, arimo-2, sans-serif; font-size: 15.6px; line-height: 18px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><strong style="background: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">“He is before all things, and in Him all things hold together.” Colossians 1:17</strong></em><br />
<em style="background: rgb(255, 255, 255); border: 0px; font-family: arimo-1, arimo-2, sans-serif; font-size: 15.6px; line-height: 18px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><strong style="background: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><br /></strong></em>
This was originally published on Andrea's blog, <a href="http://emptyplatefullheart.com/2015/04/06/you-gotta-be-a-friend-to-have-a-friend/">here</a>. Check out the rest of her writing while you're there!<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrAaURNCqscTRwivf03cTyb_Ud3vE4HEBHXgd7I4LSP0bjYVFf5o2qlBs3zu3PT3W8tYrtlNFcOOzEH6ele73u4IizKFXWgIRhWi-SDXvncKrjL4CM6eZQwctLeQy-98iOMs3W5LOWQ8M/s1600/IMG_0274.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrAaURNCqscTRwivf03cTyb_Ud3vE4HEBHXgd7I4LSP0bjYVFf5o2qlBs3zu3PT3W8tYrtlNFcOOzEH6ele73u4IizKFXWgIRhWi-SDXvncKrjL4CM6eZQwctLeQy-98iOMs3W5LOWQ8M/s320/IMG_0274.jpg" style="cursor: move;" width="239" /></a></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03774267389873705088noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-149833790792062928.post-76849357660911535112015-10-12T17:42:00.000-05:002015-10-12T17:42:00.044-05:00Community: You Keep Using that Word<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgnyhtcYKGvJqkfXYDdNuqP-fIgPQWcTU-vuUEECyai1x3sz8nrnB2IM-y35CJVPpxyyH1A5ucOjgCpLIYsjn4oQW-h48Mw-N8Iu9-jVnjnVFg55t26n-vKPcFppy2PngQgRKge8gz0eyY/s1600/IMG_5651.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgnyhtcYKGvJqkfXYDdNuqP-fIgPQWcTU-vuUEECyai1x3sz8nrnB2IM-y35CJVPpxyyH1A5ucOjgCpLIYsjn4oQW-h48Mw-N8Iu9-jVnjnVFg55t26n-vKPcFppy2PngQgRKge8gz0eyY/s400/IMG_5651.jpg" width="300" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Is community a game of risk?</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<div style="font-weight: normal; line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in; page-break-before: always; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" name="docs-internal-guid-e4ba9316-dce1-0ed7-a905-ed982bd5cfb3"></a>
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: transparent; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;">As
you might know, I'm working on a book. Rather, we're working on a
book. (We as in two of us, together.) <i>Just Hear Me Out: Conversations in the Generation Gap</i>. And you
can find out all about it <a href="https://justhearmeoutbook.wordpress.com/" style="font-style: normal;">here</a>. (We have a fun video!)</span></span></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><span style="background: transparent;">It
is, as the name implies, a conversation. About church, faith,
leadership, and all the messy bits in between that cause generations
to argue and be general turkeys rather than work together. About what
we value, envision, and fear as different generations. One of those
recurrent themes is community.</span></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="background: transparent;">Conveniently,
community is also my blog theme for October. So today, I thought we'd
run with an excerpt from the book. </span></span></span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<h3 style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: transparent; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;"><b><i>Community—You
keep using that word. </i></b></span></span></span></span></h3>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">
</span></div>
<div style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><b><span style="background: transparent;">Emily
(the Millennial):</span></b></span></span></span><span style="color: black;"><span style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="background: transparent;">
What do we value in church? Community, first-off. We want to be
accepted as we are, which can be good and bad. Everyone wants a
community they can belong to, though. We just need to make it clear
that this is a community that goes both ways, and that while we
accept everyone, we also push everyone to look at issues in their
lives.</span></span></span></span></span></span></div>
<div style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi8vAnhmSt3xYQX_dV4G5uTgTIJ9deZI4TvUFYNMisvSNRRC-YiGY1fNFjnwPzEFAiiZSmT2o47wnreCV6O8JlqX7YB5h_ZZ6KOkfrcmOqBXu5AtOlXWhfrAueM_9nPzsz06t7KWM9y94w/s1600/IMG_5654.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi8vAnhmSt3xYQX_dV4G5uTgTIJ9deZI4TvUFYNMisvSNRRC-YiGY1fNFjnwPzEFAiiZSmT2o47wnreCV6O8JlqX7YB5h_ZZ6KOkfrcmOqBXu5AtOlXWhfrAueM_9nPzsz06t7KWM9y94w/s320/IMG_5654.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Or full of loaded questions?</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><b><span style="background: transparent;">Jill
(The Baby Boomer): </span></b></span></span></span><span style="color: black;"><span style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="background: transparent;">Community
may be your new buzzword. Yet almost all the Boomers we talked to for
this book also cited community as an important value in church.
Everyone wants that family feeling. But if you're not feeling it,
either we're doing it wrong, or we don't mean the same thing by that
word. One difference is that when we Boomers talk about loyalty to a
church body, we are also talking community. The two are not separable
to us. The church we are in</span></span></span></span></span><span style="color: black;"><span style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="background: transparent;">
</span></span></span></span><span style="color: black;"><span style="text-decoration: none;"><i><span style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="background: transparent;">is</span></span></i></span></span><span style="color: black;"><span style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="background: transparent;">
</span></span></span></span><span style="color: black;"><span style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="background: transparent;">our
community. It's the same word you use—but it means something subtly
different. </span></span></span></span></span></span>
</span></div>
<div style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><b><span style="background: transparent;">Emily:</span></b></span></span></span><span style="color: black;"><span style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="background: transparent;">
Like what?</span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="background: transparent;"><br /></span></span></span></span></span></span>
<br />
<h3>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: transparent; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;">Cheers for Friends</span></span></span></span></span></h3>
</div>
<div style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><b><span style="background: transparent;">Jill:</span></b></span></span></span><span style="color: black;"><span style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="background: transparent;">
Companionship, social events, comfort, friendship, welcome. These are
all mentioned as important church considerations to the Boomer
generation. Basically, I think we all hope to find our best friend at
church. We all hope to fit in there and find people we can be like,
talk to easily, and rely on in times of need.</span></span></span></span></span></span></div>
<div style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div style="font-weight: normal; line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="background: transparent;">We
still operate under smaller circles of interaction than you do. Yes,
we are on Facebook, but we don't really have the global “families”
that you do. Ours are closer to home. We still look to our nearest
outlets for friends and companionship. The family comes first. Work
is often second. Somewhere in there, the church is a consideration,
especially if the family doesn't work out the way we had hoped. And
when we go there, we seek an atmosphere like that iconic TV show of
the 80's, Cheers—a place where everybody knows your name. </span></span></span></span></span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-weight: normal; line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div style="font-weight: normal; line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="background: transparent;">Your
generation found the same thing in </span></span></span></span><span style="color: black;"><span style="text-decoration: none;"><i><span style="background: transparent;">Friends</span></i></span></span><span style="color: black;"><span style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="background: transparent;">.
The difference was, in </span></span></span></span><span style="color: black;"><span style="text-decoration: none;"><i><span style="background: transparent;">Cheers</span></i></span></span><span style="color: black;"><span style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="background: transparent;">,
they still went home to family in the end. In </span></span></span></span><span style="color: black;"><span style="text-decoration: none;"><i><span style="background: transparent;">Friends</span></i></span></span><span style="color: black;"><span style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="background: transparent;">,
those people were the family. A not so subtle shift.</span></span></span></span></span></div>
<div style="font-weight: normal; line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEheeCC5BK1khfIPjutsLFofjInhtqA3-n9UnUXH8fazFOcOqbrDYtEh9Jh4H8uQ-eM46kcWZx3J69uecmrfUSkntd3ZdKs2sXuMCKADgZwyPZbo0ZEhvip9lFeWKG-249F5sKfUKdfEVHw/s1600/IMG_5656.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEheeCC5BK1khfIPjutsLFofjInhtqA3-n9UnUXH8fazFOcOqbrDYtEh9Jh4H8uQ-eM46kcWZx3J69uecmrfUSkntd3ZdKs2sXuMCKADgZwyPZbo0ZEhvip9lFeWKG-249F5sKfUKdfEVHw/s320/IMG_5656.jpg" width="301" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Does just trying feel like a trivial pursuit?</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><b><span style="background: transparent;">Emily:
</span></b></span></span></span><span style="color: black;"><span style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="background: transparent;">The
concept behind Friends is independence and community outside of
immediate family--a building of a chosen family. It’s odd that the
show is called Friends, then, instead of family. Perhaps it’s
because all of the main characters have messed up relationships with
their actual family, and so the Central Perk regulars decide to hold
Friendship up to a higher standard than their memories with Family. </span></span></span></span></span></span>
</span></div>
<div style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div style="font-weight: normal; line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><b><span style="background: transparent;">Jill:
</span></b></span></span></span><span style="color: black;"><span style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="background: transparent;">But
knowing one another's name isn't the same as knowing them. Most
Boomers, like Millennials, say that they yearn for a place to be
real, to tell the truth and be accepted with their messy lives. But
again, you aren’t getting that vibe from us. Truth is, I don't
either, so something is clearly more important to Boomers than the
genuineness we claim to want as much as you do.</span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="background: transparent;"><br /></span></span></span></span></span>
<br />
<h3>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="background: transparent;">Safety versus Authenticity</span></span></span></span></span></h3>
</div>
<div style="font-weight: normal; line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="background: transparent;"><br /></span></span></span></span></span></div>
<div style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="color: black; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="background: transparent;">And
something is. We value safety. We value looking good and presenting a
stoic front over being vulnerable. Where you find it safe to be among
peers telling true tales, we find it safe to pull in privately and
keep our stories to ourselves. That's changing, between pressure from
our kids (you guys) and simply being sick and tired of the whole
false front game.</span></span></span></span></span></span></div>
<div style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjB7HQKG5PxfoweTxUxjvdETzRpNPLsaf76n9EVEukjt1zR5NwjFMcVaU8OCkyh4Q8V3jhquGHoPJ9DF3n173NcrqQVswyxx_LTffPYWRMFZUNS-qMpojlXSrAJthN26rYMUJb9JnD_FUs/s1600/IMG_5657.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="373" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjB7HQKG5PxfoweTxUxjvdETzRpNPLsaf76n9EVEukjt1zR5NwjFMcVaU8OCkyh4Q8V3jhquGHoPJ9DF3n173NcrqQVswyxx_LTffPYWRMFZUNS-qMpojlXSrAJthN26rYMUJb9JnD_FUs/s400/IMG_5657.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Or maybe we just don't have a clue.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<div style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="color: black; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="background: transparent;">In
a larger worldview, where your response to a frightening,
unpredictable world is to say “What the heck, let's go kayak a
waterfall, it's all the same,” ours was to wall ourselves off and
play Risk with our lives, strategizing political and social moves to
protect our territory (while preferably expanding it). So those
values of authenticity and community? We like the sound of them, but
we want to define the terms.</span></span></span></span></span></span></div>
<div style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="background: transparent;"><b>Emily:
</b>As a Risk enthusiast, may I just say this is game usually ends in
multiple people upset and one winner lording it over everyone else.
Until the next game. When everyone gangs up on the last winner and
distrusts any alliances formed. </span></span></span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><span style="background: transparent;"><b>Jill:
</b>Community and authenticity. Two hallmark values of your
generation. Two words we want to love but pull back from. Where are
we going to come together, then, in faith and doing church if we
can't agree on the definition of these terms?</span></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhjK-C3zPZfM0eUgB1PTvjlFCAH-7eSvdhiRnskdiJSkvDs3WKxqvLuWNv4lhK2tbzE7R7UeLG1UU0bZjgcgbeKN-00OEKTPh8imNhCz7dQ2l_Es7Gqa1c_fjKnRTkZl1_28I04KoMkSvo/s1600/IMG_5655.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhjK-C3zPZfM0eUgB1PTvjlFCAH-7eSvdhiRnskdiJSkvDs3WKxqvLuWNv4lhK2tbzE7R7UeLG1UU0bZjgcgbeKN-00OEKTPh8imNhCz7dQ2l_Es7Gqa1c_fjKnRTkZl1_28I04KoMkSvo/s320/IMG_5655.jpg" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">And bonus--our favorite community-inducing<br />
board game. You'll get to know each other.<br />
Fast.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
<br />
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<br />
<div style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="color: black; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Spoilers?
No, we are not going to give them to you. What do you think the
answers to that question are? I would love your input, your
definitions, your experiences with community and faith. </span>
</div>
<div style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="color: black; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="color: black; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">And . . . </span><em style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #4c4a4a; font-family: 'PT Sans', sans-serif; font-size: 18px; line-height: 28px;">If you’d like to be part of the ongoing research/launch/fun team for the project, find me on <a href="http://www.facebook.com/jillwrites">facebook</a> and talk to me.</em></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03774267389873705088noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-149833790792062928.post-71761301961928187962015-10-05T08:00:00.000-05:002015-10-05T08:00:02.014-05:00Don't Mess with Texas<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi38vOToPSiy0-giXGnFfkLDdVaLRm2eTgtmTcBANq3pUWMhHUmT8AqsITwTqbm0itMIr7r6_lgERK232dRYXm0YBpKlY93bQcGv5tGdmxzBP7UR8YtNX14nkFA3GlxuOs8LroCroOjmkA/s1600/IMG_5490.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi38vOToPSiy0-giXGnFfkLDdVaLRm2eTgtmTcBANq3pUWMhHUmT8AqsITwTqbm0itMIr7r6_lgERK232dRYXm0YBpKlY93bQcGv5tGdmxzBP7UR8YtNX14nkFA3GlxuOs8LroCroOjmkA/s320/IMG_5490.jpg" width="240" /></a><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I went to a party a week ago. Really, almost two weeks ago, and really, it will have been a month before you read this. I went to a party in Austin, Texas at Jen Hatmaker's house. For those who do not know, Jen is an author, speaker, mom, wife, and everyone's best friend, plus she helps lead an awesome church that is basically being Jesus except with cowboy boots. </span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Apparently, the house I partied at was made famous on HGTV, but since I only get to watch HGTV in hotel rooms (we watched a<i> lot </i>of it going to Texas and back) I would not know that detail.</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">She invited her launch team to a party. I am still amazed at that fact, and I am still amazed that I picked up and just drove to get there. It's still surreal. </span> </span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Everyone else involved seems to have written about it immediately. As in, they must have gone back to their hotel rooms in Austin and blogged at midnight, people, because that's how fast some of them managed to get these reflections posted.</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I did not.</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrjgMUzuyvy1hfujfhQ-jGmWiqt00b0Ohl54cmziC81qCHsfDf5_4emtqNcSW79Gt9KOQvpOMO97UeSKtOQEsG81_ffltEOR-wppsyE8gpwguXT4jANi9tv1GPtH20SmCDNxskRQhsKZc/s1600/IMG_5432.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="381" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrjgMUzuyvy1hfujfhQ-jGmWiqt00b0Ohl54cmziC81qCHsfDf5_4emtqNcSW79Gt9KOQvpOMO97UeSKtOQEsG81_ffltEOR-wppsyE8gpwguXT4jANi9tv1GPtH20SmCDNxskRQhsKZc/s400/IMG_5432.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Yes, we really drove there. And loved it.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I went back to my room, meandered around Texas for another two days, drove back to Chicago in another three, and spent a week returning to life and processing what had happened. Because I am All. About. Processing. And not so much about getting things done right away. Let's assume it's all for good reasons and not basic procrastination.</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Being on the launch team has been a gift. In five months' time, a group of 500 of us have somehow made a community online that defied Christian stereotypes. We are a people of random ages, backgrounds, political theories, theologies, and colors. We disagree. But we don't fight. We don't call names. We don't compare. We do pray for one another, encourage one another, and mourn with one another. We even give one another our time, money, and coffee mugs. That's community, people. And until the party, most of us had never met.</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; text-align: center; text-decoration: none;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhnsfsTmRNP3FzyCn2OfuhdoZVmi-fk5rn-4GR3lm0CfcS0IuFcO55r0stGtKBUAN4AjEQulQEYIuVl8HhEshNhqK8OrQ-mjAmL9TIETyix-aIPCRZq6ezUPLhXOPZFi_hHC1gKjvKEsWs/s1600/11987096_10153142551963034_947676939999189658_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhnsfsTmRNP3FzyCn2OfuhdoZVmi-fk5rn-4GR3lm0CfcS0IuFcO55r0stGtKBUAN4AjEQulQEYIuVl8HhEshNhqK8OrQ-mjAmL9TIETyix-aIPCRZq6ezUPLhXOPZFi_hHC1gKjvKEsWs/s320/11987096_10153142551963034_947676939999189658_n.jpg" width="320" /></a><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><b>Now, here's the thing. I'm an introvert. I don't do parties. I don't do people I've never met. In large quantities. E-V-E-R. </b></span> </span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">So this was hard. I loved it, but it was hard. (Most lovely things are.) Sometimes I socialized and hugged and told stories and listened. Sometimes, I sat and just watched the buzz around me. I'm not the person to sit on Jen's porch and take selfies. I'm not the one who will approach her to talk about life, even though I feel (like so many others) that we could be bffs. I'm not the girl who will sit in the middle of a table of strangers and draw them in. </span> </span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The day after the party, many of us went to the Hatmakers' church. (I know, she would hate having it called <i>her </i>church. It's Jesus' church. But it's easier for identification purposes.) She made a comment during the sermon about it looking like a sorority house in the congregation. And it kind of did.</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-align: center; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">Which is exactly the place on earth I would feel the least comfortable. </span> </span></div>
<div style="font-weight: normal; text-align: center; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i>I am so not a sorority kind of girl.</i></span></span></div>
<div style="font-weight: normal; text-align: center; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i><br /></i></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjoBW7QYECM-xO0DihhGKgii2Rikbo9TGisHfXq35AkPf9OyP5titIcMAxY8PHDLsOVXCapw0fa8fcFgrTuyvk_5Hy_8JzscpXXfs-KagVplZWhTpGWIGmOU0IfUuIR8acGooK3xvd9SXs/s1600/11206095_860860418538_5667915067519631799_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="211" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjoBW7QYECM-xO0DihhGKgii2Rikbo9TGisHfXq35AkPf9OyP5titIcMAxY8PHDLsOVXCapw0fa8fcFgrTuyvk_5Hy_8JzscpXXfs-KagVplZWhTpGWIGmOU0IfUuIR8acGooK3xvd9SXs/s320/11206095_860860418538_5667915067519631799_n.jpg" width="320" /></a><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">In the book we launched, Jen talks about community. She tells tales of how we have the tools and the ability to reach out where we are, with who we are and what we have, to create the community the world craves. And I realized something about that while I was taking my dear sweet time processing what the party had meant. </span> </span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I love those women, and I will continue to love them and support them and do life with them. Even those I never see again. I am so grateful for their presence and for the party and for the woman who brought us there.</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">But community needs to happen where I am. It needs to happen on my back porch, in my church, in my coffee shop or library or park, where I live. The point of the book was to push us out into creating that, not to make us comfortable with a safe group of people we don't have to see on a daily basis. That is a wonderful thing too—but it's not the main thing. It can springboard us into the main thing by encouraging us along, but it isn't the thing itself.</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Wouldn't you know, looking again at her book today, that's exactly what she says,</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<blockquote class="tr_bq" style="font-style: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjllYDbDkG7b9-p55J9Vq-0Fbv-fL9PYuXyp0SbAtvc6ZSivc7dgTbsdJ4in02TZjYUJus45oFwBCOxH6Om8dNXNuBg1S8221xymuvB1JB9v8r5iE8iR9rdiKVWlU2Ctp2aTj4pbVj38So/s1600/11998869_10153687911164363_1026671226314956183_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; font-weight: normal; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjllYDbDkG7b9-p55J9Vq-0Fbv-fL9PYuXyp0SbAtvc6ZSivc7dgTbsdJ4in02TZjYUJus45oFwBCOxH6Om8dNXNuBg1S8221xymuvB1JB9v8r5iE8iR9rdiKVWlU2Ctp2aTj4pbVj38So/s320/11998869_10153687911164363_1026671226314956183_n.jpg" width="320" /></a><span style="background-color: #f4cccc; color: black; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>“Online
life is no substitute for practiced, physical presence, and it will
never replace someone looking you in the eye, padding around your
kitchen in bare feet, making you take a blind taste test on various
olives, walking in your front door without knocking.”</b></span></blockquote>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">My community needs to be where I am. And that's even harder and scarier than a strange farmhouse in Texas. </span> </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">Because its up to me. Up to my insecurities, imperfections, and fears. But that's the point. </span> </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<blockquote class="tr_bq" style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi0s43i0XHR4_6cArgLW3BX8KJZt9pUOSkqaPe7T6zDb_ajVK91IU_5RAS_1FLLa8fm8rbF3CvSSg8rKjNOmk_54oRI8XHzY4N3QkkQZyTbxGz_boP5UiK4H8_b8oloGHYiLaoRlvLghRM/s1600/11988447_860860463448_5360347036705536379_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="211" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi0s43i0XHR4_6cArgLW3BX8KJZt9pUOSkqaPe7T6zDb_ajVK91IU_5RAS_1FLLa8fm8rbF3CvSSg8rKjNOmk_54oRI8XHzY4N3QkkQZyTbxGz_boP5UiK4H8_b8oloGHYiLaoRlvLghRM/s320/11988447_860860463448_5360347036705536379_n.jpg" width="320" /></a><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"When
your worn-out kitchen table hosts good people and good conversation,
when it provides a safe place to break bread and share wine, your
house becomes a sanctuary, holy as a cathedral. If you have a porch,
then you have an altar to gather around. If you can make a pot of
chili and use a cell phone, then you can create community. If you
want to wait until your house is perfect and you aren’t nervous,
then just forget it. This is an imperfect apparatus, thank goodness.
It requires people with true faces, courageously being seen.” (Jen Hatmaker, For the Love)</span></span></blockquote>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">I can make chili. (I don't like to eat it, but I can make it. It's one of the few things I like to make.) I have a <strike style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;">porch</strike> falling-apart-deck. <i><b>I can be seen. </b></i></span> </span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg2yzbwjbY99n5cDJGxPZ5h4HpFsRYWFM1xXkttviq_DIX36vGiyCuKlhcgVa10qDEg1JXGw2NlXWcJWnkWwfew755DWcj8XxMmXQnbhXyieQIIw3ahdTEANkhPGKuNQcUEnYJ9uiGd5qo/s1600/11999083_10207346234353674_9002390744643584129_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg2yzbwjbY99n5cDJGxPZ5h4HpFsRYWFM1xXkttviq_DIX36vGiyCuKlhcgVa10qDEg1JXGw2NlXWcJWnkWwfew755DWcj8XxMmXQnbhXyieQIIw3ahdTEANkhPGKuNQcUEnYJ9uiGd5qo/s320/11999083_10207346234353674_9002390744643584129_n.jpg" width="320" /></a><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">At our house, we have a formula to test how well people know us. Appliance repairpersons, Jehovah's Witnesses, and salespeople will knock on the front door. Friends will knock on the back door. Real friends will walk in it.</span></span></div>
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<b style="background-color: #fce5cd; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; text-align: center;">In October, I want to focus on this idea of community. How do you create community? Please share your ideas, things that have worked, things that have been disasters, and thoughts for the future. I would love to see your creativity and questions!</b><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /><span style="color: black;"><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjj0_InR5dj5tRQv_aPt0a8kNb-5OjKuU0ioPIWEAXGnlaX7EVtb7ForgKpCBpM5jUmefSy3Yo1wplQ_RR3ylVx8sm13vceWGHunBF4cVRz5gQG3LPEMadnjgUe2PHV7btPp2qNJ2BYDAY/s1600/IMG_5451.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjj0_InR5dj5tRQv_aPt0a8kNb-5OjKuU0ioPIWEAXGnlaX7EVtb7ForgKpCBpM5jUmefSy3Yo1wplQ_RR3ylVx8sm13vceWGHunBF4cVRz5gQG3LPEMadnjgUe2PHV7btPp2qNJ2BYDAY/s320/IMG_5451.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Absolute proof I was in Texas.</td></tr>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03774267389873705088noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-149833790792062928.post-80041557004820763982015-09-28T08:00:00.000-05:002015-09-28T08:00:08.037-05:00(Don't) Clean up Your Mess<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjj2zxLaP-98wNWxS1VePFeZK7gHyURgXX_XysdHwj9Fb5hftq7s-FuVha-ALZdCQ3mbRjVge2LrRE9yt_42hyphenhyphenoGozw-OBU7icd8vLLSRQSFYtksechb5WO1rkC7rkyd3dVfqVfMdpM3cA/s1600/IMG_0205.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjj2zxLaP-98wNWxS1VePFeZK7gHyURgXX_XysdHwj9Fb5hftq7s-FuVha-ALZdCQ3mbRjVge2LrRE9yt_42hyphenhyphenoGozw-OBU7icd8vLLSRQSFYtksechb5WO1rkC7rkyd3dVfqVfMdpM3cA/s400/IMG_0205.JPG" width="300" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Hey, what's wrong with messes? We look great, right?</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
The more I live with people instead of
just coexisting in proximity, the more I recognize something—there
are a of of messed up people out there. Even more messed up than I
am. Yes, true story.</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
The other thing I've come to recognize
is that being messed up is not necessarily a bad thing. Neat lives
are often a sign of lives so carefully curated that they are museum
dioramas, not lives. And the thing about museum dioramas? They're
full of dead things. Stuffed dead things. This is not appealing to
most of us as an environment.
</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
A little bit of mess signals a life
that's lived in, like a couch with graham cracker crumbs welded to
the underside of the cushions. That life has taken risks, known joy,
and has the stains to prove it. Some messes are dangerous, toxic
spills that needs to be cleaned up out of our lives. But others? We
need them to prove we're alive.</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
I never wanted or imagined the mess of
a loved one with mental illness and attendant self-destructive
behavior. Given the choice, I'd have picked the carefully curated
life. Having chosen that, I would have missed out on a lot that has
made me alive.</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
I had no idea I was living amid dead
things.</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhMlYbY8QahbTxwzU_sYCCdVqvfkApZu7VEgKqlfDBOA0IpdKHx75nQsRYdei1Kotc37SIn6cycjVZ6p2tS22UJnSnd50WyXYJj8FbNEI5nt7NM1IyO55u1ouYyOvbad1U8MdUnrHDgcFc/s1600/IMG_0740.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="239" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhMlYbY8QahbTxwzU_sYCCdVqvfkApZu7VEgKqlfDBOA0IpdKHx75nQsRYdei1Kotc37SIn6cycjVZ6p2tS22UJnSnd50WyXYJj8FbNEI5nt7NM1IyO55u1ouYyOvbad1U8MdUnrHDgcFc/s320/IMG_0740.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Sometimes messes just mean something better is coming.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
Because of that experience, I've been
able to share a lot with people whose lives are broken in
various ways, and similar variations on a theme keep returning. It's
hard. It hurts. But we have learned so much. When you're in the slime
and mud of the mess, though, you really want to know what exactly
people have learned. What could possibly make this worthwhile? What
could anyone tell me to make me appreciate this wrenching time of
uncertainty?</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
I'm not sure. I suspect that when
people are slogging through those times is not always the best
opportunity to offer sage advice. Most of us aren't ready to hear it
when the pain is shrieking louder than the wisdom. But people ask.
What do you find out about life, and yourself, when your world is a
mess? How do you even survive?</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
The answer to the second question is
easy: God's grace and insistent love. Nothing more or less.</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
The answer to the first could go on a
while. But here are a few thoughts.</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<h3 style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
I learned that grace was a choice I
didn't make often enough. </h3>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
I had theoretically believed in grace, but
operationally, I extended it mostly to those who didn't look like
they needed it. For those with rough edges and incomprehensible,
annoying behavior? Maybe when they got themselves together. My
reality of g<span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">race was
not even close to God's dream of it for me. I had no idea that grace
looked a lot more like hugging a drug addict than praying for lunch
at Panera.</span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc;"><b><span style="font-size: large;">“<span style="font-family: MinionPro;">Grace
got out of hand the moment the God of the universe hung on a Roman
cross and with outstretched hands looked out upon those who had hung
him there and declared, 'Father, forgive them, for they know not what
they do.' Grace has been out of hand for more than two thousand years
now. We best get used to it.” (Rachel Held Evans, Searching for
Sunday)</span></span></b></span></div>
<span style="font-family: MinionPro;"><span style="font-size: x-small;"><br /></span></span>
<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">I
never understood that before. I didn't really want to. Now, I don't
want anything else.</span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<h3 style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">I
learned that love is always a good thing to decide. </span></h3>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjlG7EaHtvMjIursT3j0XcodQf_3-By0ypR3CM05zUW58GFPncn5Dj-XGIzLwE0DnfIFkedele3Z42WWzlcB6I2GxgS9EJ5FArMqN8KBa57IBGn0v1ouow7UAWGXxFhYU6TwB_jJ1SxHqY/s1600/IMG_4717.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjlG7EaHtvMjIursT3j0XcodQf_3-By0ypR3CM05zUW58GFPncn5Dj-XGIzLwE0DnfIFkedele3Z42WWzlcB6I2GxgS9EJ5FArMqN8KBa57IBGn0v1ouow7UAWGXxFhYU6TwB_jJ1SxHqY/s320/IMG_4717.jpg" width="199" /></a><span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">You might get
hurt. You will be taken advantage of. But love reserved for those who
deserve it and won't tamper with it is not love at all. It's a
calculated investment. CS Lewis said, <span style="color: #181818;">“</span><span style="color: #181818;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="font-weight: normal;">To
love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything and your heart will be
wrung and possibly broken.” </span></span></span></span></span>
</div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="color: #181818;">I
didn't understand that until I had to choose to love not only my
loved one in a mess but the people it brought into our lives. It
seemed God put them there despite what I wanted, so the only real
choice was to love them. And they did, indeed, break my heart. But
<i><b>broken hearts are the best kind for letting others inside.</b></i> <a href="http://twitter.com/home/?status=%20broken%20hearts%20are%20the%20best%20kind%20for%20letting%20others%20inside.%20via@JillMarieRichar%C2%A0" style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;" target="_blank"> [tweet this].</a> God's
dream for me was to lavish unconditional love, as He did. My reality
had been fearful half loving. </span></span></span>
</div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<h3>
<span style="color: #181818;"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">I
learned to honestly believe that He loves us. </span></span></h3>
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjWfYmEv_Qa_wDWCLJx0hW3fKbHpcPnVf6SqFr2q1wOjkRuKN5PlmuL32XYTQA33yTM7vNuobbWOMp2tWSqdu4WPCRlMkmFdgagASe4PuWd51GuzzW_86vMIXNQNortDfJ24ct8ufLM_T4/s1600/IMG_4614.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjWfYmEv_Qa_wDWCLJx0hW3fKbHpcPnVf6SqFr2q1wOjkRuKN5PlmuL32XYTQA33yTM7vNuobbWOMp2tWSqdu4WPCRlMkmFdgagASe4PuWd51GuzzW_86vMIXNQNortDfJ24ct8ufLM_T4/s320/IMG_4614.jpg" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">He loves our messes. Really. <br />He can handle them.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<h3>
<span style="color: #181818; font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: small; font-weight: normal;">Driving with a loved
one to a potential prison sentence is about as messy as it gets.
Until in the middle of praying you hear those words on the radio, “If
His grace is an ocean we're all sinking; oh, how He loves us so.”
And you realize for perhaps the first, or at least the most profound,
time that they are true. Not just for you but for the person sitting
next to you. And all those other persons out there who have messes in
their lives and need that grace like an ocean. He loves. Beyond our
imagination.</span></h3>
</div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="color: #181818;"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">He
takes care of the messes, beyond our imagination. All the worries and
terrors and anxieties about them do nothing helpful, while putting
the mess in His hands and leaving it there always does. Because <i><b>He
Loves</b></i> are the most needed and true words you will ever hear,
and they are bedrock when life feels more like a mudslide than a
picnic.</span></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="color: #181818;"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">I
don't know if you're feeling messy right now, and I don't know if it
helps to be told those things. Maybe you have to learn them yourself
in the fire. I think, though, that at least it helps to know someone
else has been in that mess, and it has not won. </span></span></span>
</div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiZ2ReLYXFHEdsCLwjMouWtj6SweJhYmzqUdqomguFKwdFFa4ZWnDF01CHmp28bH7PfsR4GaZ215Cy8puN8utyM7BvnFBOB7aiUj3UlYDEny43kJhMrkmtNS4QLvod7U_NFBgnp5VqgZco/s1600/IMG_4484.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiZ2ReLYXFHEdsCLwjMouWtj6SweJhYmzqUdqomguFKwdFFa4ZWnDF01CHmp28bH7PfsR4GaZ215Cy8puN8utyM7BvnFBOB7aiUj3UlYDEny43kJhMrkmtNS4QLvod7U_NFBgnp5VqgZco/s320/IMG_4484.JPG" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Something better is still coming.<br />We still have not finished this mess.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<span style="color: #181818;"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Have
you seen the sign some people hang in their kitchen that reads “God
Bless This Mess”? Yeah. That's about right. Ask Him to. He will. </span></span></span>
</div>
<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br /></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03774267389873705088noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-149833790792062928.post-89308268215097409312015-09-25T08:58:00.001-05:002015-09-25T08:58:09.909-05:00What Tabs Do You Have Open?<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgeH8pCRHE-5g_qRMTz62MT6xtcfEs-hoIQlm4hfrZRdZtjV0dPNcq5N_fNytfrwXACd6L_IfeymMGk5iNMKyeB6tMbjNq1VPK7H4isEH1CUFjlgni-RdvBgzcs6BJQORXuHTxDqfT4fYk/s1600/Screen+Shot+2013-07-22+at+8.12.58+AM.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="262" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgeH8pCRHE-5g_qRMTz62MT6xtcfEs-hoIQlm4hfrZRdZtjV0dPNcq5N_fNytfrwXACd6L_IfeymMGk5iNMKyeB6tMbjNq1VPK7H4isEH1CUFjlgni-RdvBgzcs6BJQORXuHTxDqfT4fYk/s320/Screen+Shot+2013-07-22+at+8.12.58+AM.jpg" width="320" /></a><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">It's #FridayFive link up time! This is a new fun time for me in this space. It's a chance to talk randomly about five things (I like random) and get to know one another better. It doesn't have to be profound or amazing or brave or anything. Just us. I like that, too. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">This week, the bloggers chose to write on "Five open tabs." I could go with five tabs that are often open, or five tabs I'd like you to <i>think</i> were often open, but I believe I'll just go with the literal meaning here--five tabs that are currently open on my laptop. It's a little microcosm of who I am (I cant believe I used that word in a sentence this early.)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">You have to promise to be equally honest, right? I want to know who you are, too.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgYdjIfpAvnbUlw3vh6_N8XIKOcsKvgdnxUqKD2sJ8U0OwHz1eljSBbkWybjdDNGVQ6XHiAwZT8IfBK4-BEzKVlRyKPTQ5_g6M8Huy-bNmMB_leKXUvS7GP2FXGw5PI0dagmcFHRepcKhI/s1600/IMG_5651.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgYdjIfpAvnbUlw3vh6_N8XIKOcsKvgdnxUqKD2sJ8U0OwHz1eljSBbkWybjdDNGVQ6XHiAwZT8IfBK4-BEzKVlRyKPTQ5_g6M8Huy-bNmMB_leKXUvS7GP2FXGw5PI0dagmcFHRepcKhI/s320/IMG_5651.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">#1--<a href="http://www.sporcle.com/games/g/world">http://www.sporcle.com/games/g/world</a>. I like trivia. I like geography. So to unwind at night, I go to sporcle to answer questions ranging from "What are the 197 countries of the world" (I know the answers now!) to ""Can you fill in the words to this Disney song?" It's my version of candy crush. Plus, I can answer pretty much all the Lord of the Rings and Jane Austen trivia. It offers affirmation after a long day.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">#2--<a href="http://www.relevantmagazine.com/god/god-our-generation/do-millennial-christians-actually-have-strongest-faith-any-generation">Do Millennial Christians Have the Strongest Faith of Any Generation?</a> I love reading Relevant, and I love reading about my current research/book topic, Millennials and faith. So this article is a great mix of both. Basically, I'm always going to have a research window open. Because this is work, and because I'm kind of a research nerd. "Input" is one of my strengths according to the StrengthsFinders test. It means I like to learn stuff. Like, when I have a topic to study, I want to know <i>everything</i> I can find about that topic. It gets a little overwhelming. I need to have an emergency brake.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhE037ry56mmaOlAtyXujE5Iv_pPX-uKC7zcVhyphenhyphenkodHelOsJDySRW_vXjR9jchyphenhyphendYCbnI7DeFXXe8x9U_MkYEVdmjkY4yMYnCmVIvC9Ey66qOqEIRehH-YsG1JVawVIwjTAmmsnQZfgSv0/s1600/IMG_3990.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhE037ry56mmaOlAtyXujE5Iv_pPX-uKC7zcVhyphenhyphenkodHelOsJDySRW_vXjR9jchyphenhyphendYCbnI7DeFXXe8x9U_MkYEVdmjkY4yMYnCmVIvC9Ey66qOqEIRehH-YsG1JVawVIwjTAmmsnQZfgSv0/s320/IMG_3990.jpg" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Not the dress. Just for fun.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">#3--<a href="http://search.iqrez.com/reservations/GrandBearResort/choose-accommodation?hotelid=15342&arrivalDate=05%2F27%2F2016&departureDate=05%2F30%2F2016&Adults=&Children=&Rooms=1&_ga=1.205707859.1937205443.1443020374&sessionTimeout=1">Grizzly Jack's Grand Bear Resort</a>. Because wedding. Next spring. And making accommodation reservations. Now. Because wedding on Memorial Day weekend when <i>everyone</i> wants to be at Starved Rock State Park, apparently. So, reservations. Today. Many tabs will be open this year because wedding. :) </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEigCbZcfk6eZAM8a0hhFe_tmhYAYR9k4bBjeTMSYwr83d61nWIBVmTmmhgWBnQM5ATDFnR7QCQPF9GPGnvc8Y2iIx5AqrnOUSseDimh34JyWuI1XxnlWz6bBXp_UaIspywsVseYZXz5rC0/s1600/IMG_5687+%25281%2529.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEigCbZcfk6eZAM8a0hhFe_tmhYAYR9k4bBjeTMSYwr83d61nWIBVmTmmhgWBnQM5ATDFnR7QCQPF9GPGnvc8Y2iIx5AqrnOUSseDimh34JyWuI1XxnlWz6bBXp_UaIspywsVseYZXz5rC0/s320/IMG_5687+%25281%2529.jpg" width="240" /></a><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">#4--<a href="http://loveofdixie.com/dear-mom-letters-brave/">For the Love of Dixie.</a> Because that's where my guest blogging post was yesterday. I still have to do more social media work on it, so it is still open. I can't even read it again. It makes me cry. What would you say to your mom in a letter if you could? </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Also, while I'm at it, the other site I guest posted on yesterday is also open, for the same reasons. <a href="http://chronicallywhole.com/too-whatever/">Chronically Whole</a>. Not as teary. I decided to go more for my sarcasm font. But the subject is quite real--why do we chase the illusion of a perfect body? So, #4 looks like I keep tabs open just to talk about me a lot. Sometimes I do. Writers have to. I hate that part.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">#5--Facebook. Obviously. This needs no explanation.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">What tabs do you have open? What are you concentrating on in this season of your life? I would love to know! Comment below. And, you can see the other linkups <a href="http://mrsdisciple.com/five-open-tabs/">here</a> to find out what interesting things other people have dug up.</span><br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03774267389873705088noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-149833790792062928.post-65463010827528509562015-09-21T08:00:00.000-05:002015-09-21T08:00:07.874-05:00Dirty Laundry: Questioning the Have-To's of Our Lives<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhK8VUN7VRqmLUghqgcHKSHPyUFDFcdzPB88V8kUqkkugt-DJHDzMwvrhm7d4Ms81Qr3asrq_sApMK25gCkUKvVngMHa3_zwqpsRSDyN9yJlVcetR-iFS-IfHB_J9_pWUMGau0xHhBa1lM/s1600/263946_10150310625375126_208179_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhK8VUN7VRqmLUghqgcHKSHPyUFDFcdzPB88V8kUqkkugt-DJHDzMwvrhm7d4Ms81Qr3asrq_sApMK25gCkUKvVngMHa3_zwqpsRSDyN9yJlVcetR-iFS-IfHB_J9_pWUMGau0xHhBa1lM/s1600/263946_10150310625375126_208179_n.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">One
of our cats prefers to hang out in the clean laundry basket.
Whatever. I'm so used to cat hair on my clothes I don't stress too
much over the fact that he gets it there before I've even had a
chance to put them away. </span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">But the other day he hunkered down in there
while I was actually doing the laundry. So it happened that I began
to toss clean folded laundry on top of him. Hey, if you're going to
lounge around where I'm working, expect to get buried in stuff. </span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEicgBk7AVNXv_XJd1kBmJ43pnZcCb26YN9Ol6DPh2jkFMolo1afvwGBwWZqK0jtckHFkZxQ60KibDbEraTFlhrmX4aW_Pvd2wLaGpb4_3UarItmWVQl8VO2qeuiwaRYQJ8H5lyNHRwUwgs/s1600/thespian.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEicgBk7AVNXv_XJd1kBmJ43pnZcCb26YN9Ol6DPh2jkFMolo1afvwGBwWZqK0jtckHFkZxQ60KibDbEraTFlhrmX4aW_Pvd2wLaGpb4_3UarItmWVQl8VO2qeuiwaRYQJ8H5lyNHRwUwgs/s320/thespian.jpg" width="227" /></a><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">He did not
move. No matter how many clean clothes I piled on top of him, on he
slept. He may have opened a slightly perturbed eye now and then, but
he had no plan to get out of that basket anytime soon.
</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<h3>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sitting in Dirty Laundry?</span></h3>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">At
first, I wondered what to make of this. I mean, wouldn't a normal
human being (read that cat) want to maybe move away if he was
being suffocated in stuff? Then I thought about it a bit more. And I
wondered how often that was true in my own life. How many times have
I sat there while life, or other people, piled things on top of me? I
just took them and slept on. When it would make sense to wake up and
say, “Hey! Didn't you notice me in here?” and then get the heck
our from underneath all that junk, sometimes I don't behave any
smarter than the cat.
</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<h3>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Comfortable <strike>Excuses</strike> Reasons</span></h3>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">There may be lot of crap being piled on top of me, but I am comfortable. Moving
is work. Moving means finding a new place to be. It means giving up
the known and comfortable basket and making the effort to walk away
toward other options.
</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Raise
of hands—how many of you do that consistently? I thought so.
</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I
know so, because I hear it all the time.</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
</div>
<ul>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I'd
like more time together at home but I have to take my kid to four
practices this week. . .</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I
would hang out but there's this project at work someone else was
supposed to do and now. . .</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">My
family expects me to host this big dinner and I can't take the stress
. . .</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I'm
going to feel so guilty if I don't do this the way my in-laws want it
done. . .</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">There
are two meetings and an outreach event and a kids' camp at church
this week, and I really should be there . . .</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">It's
my three-year-old's birthday and I </span><i style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">have</i><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> to make zoo cupcake
trains. (Is that even a thing?!)</span></li>
</ul>
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhk7V47iEzII_esIiY9FnWCbME3xCviubsYrKDnc59lGQ3Ywuqcyc4mc6AdNyTtpnt4tGJ6bOACn48XSNZUsaxWYaYAzdo_9nXVS6CjFgXNBCaNLUU53SBy2i1K4fyUcm1nsEVaxhtXrME/s1600/P1040635.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="301" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhk7V47iEzII_esIiY9FnWCbME3xCviubsYrKDnc59lGQ3Ywuqcyc4mc6AdNyTtpnt4tGJ6bOACn48XSNZUsaxWYaYAzdo_9nXVS6CjFgXNBCaNLUU53SBy2i1K4fyUcm1nsEVaxhtXrME/s320/P1040635.JPG" width="320" /></a><br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Did
you notice some of the common words in those all-too-real scenarios?
Expect. But. Supposed to. Guilt. Should. Have to.</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<h3>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Ask the Questions</span></h3>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">There
is all kinds of stuff being piled on us all the time, and we accept
it because it comes with those magically guilt-inducing words: <span style="background-color: #fce5cd;">"have
to.</span>" When was the last time you looked at one of those expectations
and asked, “Do I really?”</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
</div>
<ul>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Do
I really have to put my kid in all those sports, or can I step off
that wild ride?</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Do
I really have to complete someone else's work, or am I just
controlling that it has to get done?</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Do
I really have to host a dinner for family, or can we call it a
potluck?</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Do
I really have to craft a birthday party that rivals Martha Stewart
and Disney combined, or will a family get together with a cake and
candles do fine?</span></li>
</ul>
<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i><b><br />
</b></i></span></div>
</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i><b> What
are we afraid is going to happen if we question the have-to's in our
life?</b></i> <a href="http://twitter.com/home/?status=%20Whatare%20we%20afraid%20is%20going%20to%20happen%20if%20we%20question%20the%20have-to%27s%20in%20ourlife?%20via@JillMarieRichar%C2%A0" target="_blank">[tweet this].</a>
</span></div>
</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Hard truth--We put too much blame on what others are throwing on us and
take too little responsibility for not moving out from underneath it
all. Their laundry is stifling, but at least we know we're
comfortably in control of making others happy. We know we're needed.
We know it will get done right. </span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Let's be honest, more often than not,
if we're sitting under a load of stuff, we have chosen to sit there.
We could get out. But we're afraid to leave the warm security, even
if it's slowly suffocating us.</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
</div>
<ul>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">What's
the worst thing that can happen if I say no?</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">What
terrible tragedy will take place if I decide to let something go I
think I have to control?</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">What
world will spin out if I choose to let others be responsible for
themselves?</span></li>
</ul>
<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
</div>
<ul>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i><b>Will
I still be a worthwhile, loved person if I get out from under the
pile?</b></i></span></li>
</ul>
<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">As
Jen Hatmaker writes in <i>For the Love</i>,</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="background-color: #ead1dc; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in; text-align: center;">
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="background-color: #ead1dc; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">“We
no longer assess our lives with any accuracy. We have lost the
ability to declare a job well-done. We measure our performance
against an <i>invented standard </i>and come up wanting, and it is
destroying our joy. No matter how hard we work or excel in an area or
two, it never feels like enough. Our primary defaults are exhaustion
and guilt. Meanwhile, we have beautiful lives begging to be really
lived, really enjoyed, really applauded—and it is simpler than we
dare hope.”</span></blockquote>
</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<h3>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Jump Out</span></h3>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">How
simple? Get out of the laundry basket. Decide now that the world will
not implode if you don't please everyone or control the outcome of
everything. Start asking yourself the questions: Do I really? What's
the worst that could happen? Will I still matter?</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">It's
doubt on that last one that kills us. So let's settle it now. <i><b><span style="color: #741b47;">You are
a human being made in the image of God.</span></b></i> (At least I think you're
human. If you're not, and you're reading this blog, pleeeease send me
a video.)
</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">That
image has never been rescinded. It's never been recalled. It's never
been contingent on how much you've done to earn it. It was a done
deal at creation. If someone else wants to doubt that about you,
that's their big ol' mess of laundry, not yours. Pitch it off.</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">That's
why we have beautiful lives begging to be really lived. It was wired
into us from the beginning. Lived in the sense of knowing all the way
through us that it is freer outside of the basket where the air is
clear. (Especially if it's dirty laundry being thrown on us. Eeew.)
It only seems scarier just before you jump out.</span><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiXHDDNlrk2E7bWyokwnrhLAqcY_tffJKPALcGgA0SRnnUQK9kkwJcrUHF_BXhIobc52crHtwRA-63U7HWNzY-xqlF_aKVuXPhCje6MI1iqy6wbXrSGNUIesAmIhsiGhNqixcYu8fIe8DM/s1600/IMG_4674.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiXHDDNlrk2E7bWyokwnrhLAqcY_tffJKPALcGgA0SRnnUQK9kkwJcrUHF_BXhIobc52crHtwRA-63U7HWNzY-xqlF_aKVuXPhCje6MI1iqy6wbXrSGNUIesAmIhsiGhNqixcYu8fIe8DM/s640/IMG_4674.JPG" width="480" /></a></span></div>
<br />
<br /></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03774267389873705088noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-149833790792062928.post-4305115511899507782015-09-11T11:14:00.000-05:002015-09-11T11:14:10.874-05:00Friday Five--Five Smiles<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg3OF5eKQmxuZQOoNpyTkpQsgbL7u5v3DXGeNrmQ4snEstajv-4zm5hCO32KLpqsLYIPa9XHdVl4Po4rywfaTtfgn8OQ8zfCxIsg57Ad9DMvkMvDOBVmqD6YkrKkTjZOV0JyrobkB9_RZg/s1600/IMG_5331.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg3OF5eKQmxuZQOoNpyTkpQsgbL7u5v3DXGeNrmQ4snEstajv-4zm5hCO32KLpqsLYIPa9XHdVl4Po4rywfaTtfgn8OQ8zfCxIsg57Ad9DMvkMvDOBVmqD6YkrKkTjZOV0JyrobkB9_RZg/s400/IMG_5331.jpg" width="300" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Getting our kicks . . . </td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">I
have finally figured out my love language. I don't do dinner parties.
I don't cook, in fact, unless under extreme duress. I don't do social
gatherings larger than 3 close friends. I'm not a great counselor
(although I am a good listener, and sometimes God comes up with great
things to say through and despite me). </span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">I don't remember birthdays on
social media and may forget those in my immediate family on occasion.
So how in the world do I connect with people? </span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I
have discovered that my “connection” language is travel. I should
have known that. In the car is where most personal discussions with
my kids have ever taken place. Travel memories are the ones our
family returns to time and again. So other people will cook with
their friends—I will travel to know you. I just have to figure out
how to make that affordable.</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Since
this week's link is Friday Five Smiles (click <a href="http://mrsdisciple.com/fridayfive-glimpses-of-joy/">here</a> to see more), I thought this revelation was
good for today, because I've just been on a week-long road trip with
a daughter. And we had smiles. SO many of them. Here are Five.</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">I
let her choose our first motel. She picked this cute place authentic
to Route 66. This set off an intentional detour the next day to stay
on the iconic highway for a while rather than get back on zoom-zoom
44. We smiled, a lot. </span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><b><i>Slowing
down often produces smiles. </i></b></span>
</span></div>
<div style="text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><b><i><br /></i></b></span></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiGTvqI2RNvXeb0ZbHp9OI3u_OtI6kuZHxcgeBvHVru4NKQdxG6EGo0CSTYDsJfv8CvjSMPuimhKJjtvTmDReoU3E8AdjGkS7tr9MG5JpewfuMQ5tPbZUE9j9_w9CKpp8xc8-pP02SVS-I/s1600/IMG_5397.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiGTvqI2RNvXeb0ZbHp9OI3u_OtI6kuZHxcgeBvHVru4NKQdxG6EGo0CSTYDsJfv8CvjSMPuimhKJjtvTmDReoU3E8AdjGkS7tr9MG5JpewfuMQ5tPbZUE9j9_w9CKpp8xc8-pP02SVS-I/s320/IMG_5397.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">We
drove off course a bit to see a giant blue whale. You could jump off
it into a pond. We didn't. But you<i> could</i>. And that made it super
cool. Particularly in the middle of Oklahoma, where giant blue whales
are not common. </span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><i>Life's
detours are great chances for connection and smiles.</i></b></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">We
set off smoke alarms in a hotel in Shreveport. This was not our
fault—the air conditioning had left the room at a cozy 61 degrees
when we walked in at 11 pm, and we needed some heat to stay there.
Unfortunately, turning on the heat released noxious fumes that
simulated (or were) something burning. The smell and noise was not
smiley or fun. But the laughter afterward was. You connect when you
try to torch a hotel together. </span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i><b>Mistakes
and malfunctions create smiles, when we treat them like adventures
together rather than disasters.</b></i></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">We
did new things and found whole new worlds. Serendipitously, the two even
connected. </span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhUmq2Tehm6eMqV3CVuqstDZrutc7yKrkwGWOR1wr0kBFkGK1QzfL_tzuU5BuOvyu-eysPCTc1AC8nd62LeMolchohggXe67yBnVIMZBnPvenKUMI9dl9P18UPvf4b8MA6bK8Bu6DeG0M8/s1600/IMG_5472.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhUmq2Tehm6eMqV3CVuqstDZrutc7yKrkwGWOR1wr0kBFkGK1QzfL_tzuU5BuOvyu-eysPCTc1AC8nd62LeMolchohggXe67yBnVIMZBnPvenKUMI9dl9P18UPvf4b8MA6bK8Bu6DeG0M8/s320/IMG_5472.jpg" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">No, that is henna. Not that adventurous.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEju5naN0ZT28M_GSkwAMM5F2cqNGeQb8ZBBpkIqWgWj0UwB5FLRaxXQxUDyq-45hByjaCTCg7rwL_0vIU4UK6IoCljJXsEIj6B3nx0r8QVzxfu1WBSB9yer4wjbPyI_6T4ieMgnxLWonuw/s1600/IMG_5499.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEju5naN0ZT28M_GSkwAMM5F2cqNGeQb8ZBBpkIqWgWj0UwB5FLRaxXQxUDyq-45hByjaCTCg7rwL_0vIU4UK6IoCljJXsEIj6B3nx0r8QVzxfu1WBSB9yer4wjbPyI_6T4ieMgnxLWonuw/s320/IMG_5499.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><i><br /></i></b></span></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center; text-decoration: none;">
<b style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i>Braving
the new is an achievement worth smiling about.</i></b></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-align: center; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">We
chronicled all the signs we we passed through.</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"></span></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjznLKjPkJNPssTA98b_3S_8ZDs7sRq-7FTGvoYn35EEU4um4ZXBEj36Yz3jSekv5mE8Snk5tj9Rsx1JvtMYaG1MHSHkg3G68sA1t7t5mNWB7mHw9V3f7aDVLrgycQ6bxK3xZ2UN-irCQU/s1600/IMG_5432.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="381" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjznLKjPkJNPssTA98b_3S_8ZDs7sRq-7FTGvoYn35EEU4um4ZXBEj36Yz3jSekv5mE8Snk5tj9Rsx1JvtMYaG1MHSHkg3G68sA1t7t5mNWB7mHw9V3f7aDVLrgycQ6bxK3xZ2UN-irCQU/s400/IMG_5432.jpg" width="400" /></a></span></span></div>
<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><i><br /></i></b></span></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><i>Because
it's always good to smile at both where you've been and where you're
going.</i></b></span></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiolxuqn6jiLKw8jMtw82I-ths7UXerT8Y3Sz3lLfoVV9BbyunUS1fa33HWJPjL_JVBrI-oOkA9IFT_L8JhleezALkIopNIKxhjgPBhhUGVn12g7y07QKNDgVR9DvNV0QAkQJgKVtrMJv8/s1600/IMG_5360.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiolxuqn6jiLKw8jMtw82I-ths7UXerT8Y3Sz3lLfoVV9BbyunUS1fa33HWJPjL_JVBrI-oOkA9IFT_L8JhleezALkIopNIKxhjgPBhhUGVn12g7y07QKNDgVR9DvNV0QAkQJgKVtrMJv8/s320/IMG_5360.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgqqbpOmK-aadyGWCQQ4Buqop_PfUX-g4FLb9c4gvria2jbEWsgYBu3AzKiWDG2s5yC-Z-ys79GdehVrSwhN7pNK2cTp-IS6eIF7dFy7C_V8wHDiP_dpfjmH-K_1_9U7G8B8O0OnGskwmI/s1600/IMG_5361.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgqqbpOmK-aadyGWCQQ4Buqop_PfUX-g4FLb9c4gvria2jbEWsgYBu3AzKiWDG2s5yC-Z-ys79GdehVrSwhN7pNK2cTp-IS6eIF7dFy7C_V8wHDiP_dpfjmH-K_1_9U7G8B8O0OnGskwmI/s320/IMG_5361.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
<br />
<br />
Happy Friday!<br />
<br />
What are your smiles today?<br />
<br />
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03774267389873705088noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-149833790792062928.post-83385308650011427702015-09-10T09:24:00.000-05:002015-09-10T09:24:51.700-05:00HOT! A New Novel<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgz8gv0THX1tkeYJJtFiL4HN-VQCr1KG4oeWe4LrMuhSZ3j1JvC-uDhgdMtqho3IfpiomefSE5dPe3FH5Kty2a4qcF3sKe6s1zHyDNz_-S4uZDn7H0-iDrRpFri75lje-40WKSJ4geKGbM/s1600/11923401_10153643785846337_415256289_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgz8gv0THX1tkeYJJtFiL4HN-VQCr1KG4oeWe4LrMuhSZ3j1JvC-uDhgdMtqho3IfpiomefSE5dPe3FH5Kty2a4qcF3sKe6s1zHyDNz_-S4uZDn7H0-iDrRpFri75lje-40WKSJ4geKGbM/s400/11923401_10153643785846337_415256289_n.jpg" width="392" /></a></div>
<div align="LEFT" style="border: none; line-height: 128%; margin-bottom: 0in; margin-right: 0.04in; orphans: 1; padding: 0in;">
<span style="color: #373e4d;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: #f6f7f8; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;">Today
I have the privilege to introduce you to a new novel by David
Stearman. Now, if you know me by now, you know I'm not a huge novel
reader. My favorite living writer is Malcolm Gladwell, people. </span></span></span></span></span></div>
<div align="LEFT" style="border: none; line-height: 128%; margin-bottom: 0in; margin-right: 0.04in; orphans: 1; padding: 0in;">
<span style="color: #373e4d;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: #f6f7f8; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;"><br /></span></span></span></span></span></div>
<div align="LEFT" style="border: none; line-height: 128%; margin-bottom: 0in; margin-right: 0.04in; orphans: 1; padding: 0in;">
<span style="color: #373e4d;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: #f6f7f8; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;">But I
have been blogging with David for a while and greatly respect his skill and
desire to tell a good story that moves people toward God. So it's
exciting to hear his take on how HOT! does just that.</span></span></span></span></span></div>
<div align="LEFT" style="border: none; line-height: 128%; margin-bottom: 0in; margin-right: 0.04in; orphans: 1; padding: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div align="LEFT" style="border: none; line-height: 128%; margin-bottom: 0in; margin-right: 0.04in; orphans: 1; padding: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: #373e4d;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: #f6f7f8; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;"><b style="font-style: normal;">David,
first Give us the gist of the new book without giving it away. </b><br /><br /><i>Hot
</i>is the story of a young Jake, whose competitiveness with his peers
drives him to become a rock star. He gives his all to reach this
goal, sacrificing friends and even Chloe, the girl he loves, to reach
the top. But once there he discovers how lonely life can be at the
top. Now all he wants is to restore the dream he lived before his
dreams came true. But most of all, Jake wants reconnect with Chloe,
whom he once betrayed. Can he do it? Can Jake find his way back home
and into Chloe’s arms? Well, you’ve gotta read the book to find
out. <br /><br /><b style="font-style: normal;">How did the idea for this book start? </b></span></span>
</span></div>
<div align="LEFT" style="border: none; line-height: 128%; margin-bottom: 0in; margin-right: 0.04in; orphans: 1; padding: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div align="LEFT" style="border: none; line-height: 128%; margin-bottom: 0in; margin-right: 0.04in; orphans: 1; padding: 0in;">
<span style="color: #373e4d;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="background: #f6f7f8;">I
used to be a recording artist, so elements of this story are
autobiographical. My dream was legitimate, and God made it happen.
But I’m thankful I never made it “enormously big” like Jake
did. Past a certain point, a life of fame can be rife with pitfalls.</span></span></span></span></span></div>
<ol>
<ol>
<ol>
<ol>
<ol>
<ol>
<ol>
<ol>
<ol start="3">
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</div>
</ol>
</ol>
</ol>
</ol>
</ol>
</ol>
</ol>
</ol>
</ol>
<div align="LEFT" style="border: none; line-height: 128%; margin-bottom: 0in; margin-right: 0.04in; orphans: 1; padding: 0in;">
<span style="color: #373e4d;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: #f6f7f8; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;"><b>What
appealed to you about the setting, history, or culture of the
project? </b><br /><br />My love of the music business. Which is not unlike
the “book business,” which I love every bit as much.</span></span></span></span></div>
<div align="LEFT" style="border: none; line-height: 128%; margin-bottom: 0in; margin-right: 0.04in; orphans: 1; padding: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div align="LEFT" style="border: none; line-height: 128%; margin-bottom: 0in; margin-right: 0.04in; orphans: 1; padding: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: #373e4d;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: #f6f7f8; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;"><b>What
aspect of the main character makes him/her most interesting?</b> <br /><br />We
can all relate to Jake’s insecurity and vulnerability. And his
childlike simplicity and fascination for life makes him lovable. What
makes him interesting are his choices; how he chooses poorly in the
beginning but learns from his mistakes later on. </span></span></span>
</span></div>
<div align="LEFT" style="border: none; line-height: 128%; margin-bottom: 0in; margin-right: 0.04in; orphans: 1; padding: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div align="LEFT" style="border: none; line-height: 128%; margin-bottom: 0in; margin-right: 0.04in; orphans: 1; padding: 0in;">
<span style="color: #373e4d;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: #f6f7f8; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;"><b>What
drives you when you write? </b><br /><br />The desire to help someone else
live a happier, more fulfilled life. I know this might sound fake,
and even cheesy to some people, but it’s the truth.</span></span></span></span></div>
<div align="LEFT" style="border: none; line-height: 128%; margin-bottom: 0in; margin-right: 0.04in; orphans: 1; padding: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div align="LEFT" style="border: none; line-height: 128%; margin-bottom: 0in; margin-right: 0.04in; orphans: 1; padding: 0in;">
<span style="color: #373e4d;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: #f6f7f8; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;"><b style="font-style: normal;">Just
for Fun--what is the best travel experience you've ever had (or
worst!), favorite hobby, and/or favorite place/cuisine to eat? </b><br /><br /><i>Best
travel inexperience:</i> I do a lot of missionary work, so seeing an
entire Philippine village who had never heard the Gospel stand upon
their feet and give their lives to Jesus Christ was the best thing
ever.<br /><br /><i>Favorite hobby:</i> Archery. My arms itch to shoot arrows
every day. I can’t explain it. I know it sounds boring, but
shooting an awesome score is just too much fun. Think if it like
golf, but you get to poke things with a pointy stick.</span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div align="LEFT" style="border: none; line-height: 128%; margin-bottom: 0in; margin-right: 0.04in; orphans: 1; padding: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: #373e4d;"><span style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: #f6f7f8; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;"><i>Favorite
place/cuisine:</i> I have two, which contrast with one another. I once
had canard en croute in a little restaurant in the South of France.
It was every bit as awesome as it sounds. But my favorite of all are
the huevos rancheros my friend Roman whips up in his humble little
rooftop cafe in Puerto Vallarta, Mexico. </span></span></span>
</span></div>
<div align="LEFT" style="border: none; line-height: 128%; margin-bottom: 0in; margin-right: 0.04in; orphans: 1; padding: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div align="LEFT" style="border: none; line-height: 128%; margin-bottom: 0in; margin-right: 0.04in; orphans: 1; padding: 0in;">
<span style="color: #373e4d;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: #f6f7f8; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;"><b>What
else is in the works for you?</b><br /><br />I recently wrote a novella about
cowboys, Apaches, and some supernatural goings-on. It’s a blast,
but heartwarming and meaningful, too. My agent said it made her cry.
Can’t wait ‘til this one’s out in print.</span></span></span></span></div>
<div align="LEFT" style="border: none; line-height: 128%; margin-bottom: 0in; margin-right: 0.04in; orphans: 1; padding: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div align="LEFT" style="border: none; line-height: 128%; margin-bottom: 0in; margin-right: 0.04in; orphans: 1; padding: 0in;">
<span style="color: #373e4d;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="background: #f6f7f8;">You
can learn more about David by: </span></span></span></span></span></div>
<div align="LEFT" style="border: none; line-height: 128%; margin-bottom: 0in; margin-right: 0.04in; orphans: 1; padding: 0in;">
<span style="color: #373e4d;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="background: #f6f7f8;">Following him on <a href="https://twitter.com/DavidStearman">Twitter</a>. </span></span></span></span></span></div>
<div align="LEFT" style="border: none; line-height: 128%; margin-bottom: 0in; margin-right: 0.04in; orphans: 1; padding: 0in;">
<span style="color: #373e4d;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="background: #f6f7f8;">Finding him on <a href="https://www.facebook.com/david.stearman">Facebook</a>. </span></span></span></span></span></div>
<div align="LEFT" style="border: none; line-height: 128%; margin-bottom: 0in; margin-right: 0.04in; orphans: 1; padding: 0in;">
<span style="color: #373e4d;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="background: #f6f7f8;">Checking out his reviews on <a href="http://www.goodreads.com/author/show/6454021.David_Stearman">Goodreads</a>. </span></span></span></span></span></div>
<div align="LEFT" style="border: none; line-height: 128%; margin-bottom: 0in; margin-right: 0.04in; orphans: 1; padding: 0in;">
<span style="color: #373e4d;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="background: #f6f7f8;">Or reading his <a href="http://tropikbird.wordpress.com/">blog</a>.</span></span></span></span></span></div>
<div align="LEFT" style="border: none; line-height: 128%; margin-bottom: 0in; margin-right: 0.04in; orphans: 1; padding: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div align="LEFT" style="border: none; line-height: 128%; margin-bottom: 0in; margin-right: 0.04in; orphans: 1; padding: 0in;">
<span style="color: #373e4d;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: #f6f7f8; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;"><b>And
you can order HOT! Now <a href="http://www.amazon.com/HOT-Loves-Flame-Survive-Fame-ebook/dp/B012U5TZWQ">here</a>.</b></span></span></span></span></div>
<br />
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<br />
</div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03774267389873705088noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-149833790792062928.post-28634603813650324392015-08-31T10:35:00.003-05:002015-08-31T10:35:57.804-05:00Screaming Comets, Hot Messes, and Grace<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I
have been blessed for the last several months to be a part of the
launch team for Jen Hatmaker's new book, <i>For the Love: Fighting
for Grace in a World of Impossible Standards </i>(available <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Love-Fighting-Grace-Impossible-Standards/dp/0718031822/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1441034106&sr=1-1&keywords=for+the+love">here </a>on
Amazon).</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in; text-decoration: none;">
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg69cqByGvUy7OFWi6lbCSkZ4Zz8nmCHhwGgTgvK8CRJyPMSrXfIpffVofupnIPw20NISsMtaz2Qrjz_LNsuIAWsn0NW2v8EEbbTyr1AemLANlvzYCXdchWQJmHAxrA4dJvg_zTJLJzWQ8/s1600/IMG_5234.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg69cqByGvUy7OFWi6lbCSkZ4Zz8nmCHhwGgTgvK8CRJyPMSrXfIpffVofupnIPw20NISsMtaz2Qrjz_LNsuIAWsn0NW2v8EEbbTyr1AemLANlvzYCXdchWQJmHAxrA4dJvg_zTJLJzWQ8/s400/IMG_5234.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">But guys, the wild unpredictable can be gorgeous.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">This
is the final installment of my series taking chapters of the book
that spoke to my work and discussing them. Thus far,we've covered
crazy self-imposed expectations of parenting, responding to the
millennial generation, and allowing the gospel of Jesus to be what He
said it was. </span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">This
week: <b><span style="color: #cc0000;">grace</span></b>. That's it. Just grace. The topic of my seminary thesis,
so you know, it is just a tad important to me. However, that thesis
was written twenty years ago, and you know what? I had <i style="color: black; font-weight: normal;">no idea</i> what
the word meant.</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Oh,
theologically, sure. We were told to choose one word that defined
what we believed and described God and the gospel, or something like
that. I chose grace. Somehow, I knew it would be a very important
word for me. Or God knew. But really? I hadn't a clue.</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">More
life had to be lived before I would have any idea what grace meant.
Far more hurt had to be experienced, far more gratitude realized, and
far more pride peeled away before I could even get a start on a
kindergarten comprehension of that word.</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">See,
I was a high school debater. I was also high school valedictorian.
You know what all that means, in addition to being facts I can trot
out to impress approximately no one at this point? I specialized in
persuasion. I knew how to argue, I knew how to research, and I knew
how to get it right. When I became a Christian, I took those skills
with me into the brave new world of belief.</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">I
soon discovered they could be used as weapons. </span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">I
believed in grace, but it was mostly grace for those who had already
repented. My concept of grace looked more like forgiveness for those
who already had figured out how to get it right. </span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Now,
I understand the truth of what Jen says about that line of thinking.</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: #d9d2e9;"><br /></span></span></span></div>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjy1XwcynHcNBgah0n6VfGdVt7j8kG_3sCdTZSYAgSKaLJqwLWpbHb-_6F2JzaLPcDR2IH_0zrUgB6EfAGKnYZX6ozp5UA99nsUfiPdNUbvFtV6CDbh7Kn-WHiJqqP2BoMKyRcKLCIqSUE/s1600/IMG_5227.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="background-color: white;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjy1XwcynHcNBgah0n6VfGdVt7j8kG_3sCdTZSYAgSKaLJqwLWpbHb-_6F2JzaLPcDR2IH_0zrUgB6EfAGKnYZX6ozp5UA99nsUfiPdNUbvFtV6CDbh7Kn-WHiJqqP2BoMKyRcKLCIqSUE/s320/IMG_5227.jpg" width="240" /></span></a><b style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">“We
tend to formulize the mysterious, opting for a more manageable gospel
than the wild, unpredictable one we have. We’d like one with
clearer edges and better boundaries, because who can fathom a Savior
born in a barn who washed the feet of His followers before dying for
people who hated Him?<br /> </span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">It is no
wonder humanity has long preferred legalism, which involves much
cleaner territory. Give me a rule any day. Give me a clear “in”
and “out” because boundaries make me feel safe. If I can clearly
mark the borders, then I am assured of my insider status—the
position I feel compelled to defend, the one thing I can be sure of.
I want to stand before God having gotten it right. <span style="color: black;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="text-decoration: none;">Doctrine
is tidier terrain than flesh and blood.”</span></span></span></span></b></blockquote>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></span></span></span></span></span>
<br />
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I
wanted life, and grace, to be manageable. It wasn't until life got so
unmanageable for me, beyond the capabilities of my valedictorian
credentials, that grace screamed in, stunning and electrifying, like
a comet with a star-streamed tail across my dark sky. Disorienting
like that, too.</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">The
God who spoke from a flaming bush and pushed his way into a cattle
stall swaddled in blood and fluid never offered us clean lines. He
brazenly led the way to coloring outside the clean lines when he
dined with prostitutes and called tax collectors out of treetops. </span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> God led us into the wild terrain of unmitigated, incomprehensible grace. And
sometimes, we don't like it. <a href="http://twitter.com/home/?status=%20God%20led%20us%20into%20the%20wild%20terrain%20of%20unmitigated,%20incomprehensible%20grace.%20Andsometimes,%20we%20don%27t%20like%20it..%20via@JillMarieRichar%C2%A0" target="_blank"> [tweet this].</a>It messes with our clean lines. It
defies our borders. It threatens our safe standing.</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;">Grace
forces us to stare at the depths of our own capacity for sin.
Honestly, I'd far rather stare at the depths of someone else's. </span>
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Looking
at our own forces us to look at those others differently, as folks
just like us. The place this is the most difficult, sometimes, is
right in the chair next to us on a Sunday morning. Because if anyone
should have it right by now, it should be those other church people,
right?</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Wrong.</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"></span></span><br /><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"></span></span></div>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgIjlA9IZrFcqIUhfQvH2_PwX5lyTx-Lcv6bo2MEwMGaxlW0zsJOIis7NedHjqJgJOOkCr3DyKslfzu-07_8TL4RiHDHhExNLlxacYdO1Ys7WqInuhtgqcFV-JXv33fqi741g4fz9r5Pxs/s1600/20150809_161242.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="225" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgIjlA9IZrFcqIUhfQvH2_PwX5lyTx-Lcv6bo2MEwMGaxlW0zsJOIis7NedHjqJgJOOkCr3DyKslfzu-07_8TL4RiHDHhExNLlxacYdO1Ys7WqInuhtgqcFV-JXv33fqi741g4fz9r5Pxs/s400/20150809_161242.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Church can sometimes be like this, right? And this is FUN.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">“Church
people are regular old sinners too. If I could fix this, I would. As
it turns out, the church isn’t a gathering of shiny new pennies. It
lets anyone in the door! All sorts of hooligans fill the sanctuaries:
kind and good ones, angry and cynical ones, mean and judgmental ones,
smart and funny ones, broken and sad ones, weird and awkward ones,
precious and loving ones, scared and wounded ones, brave and
passionate ones, insiders and outliers, newbies and lifers and
trying-one-more-timers. Just a whole bunch of human people. Every
church has all these folks. It is just the hottest mess, but clearly
you belong here because everyone does.”</span></blockquote>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Grace. A
church throwing open its doors and admitting to the world that it is
what it is. Not a bunch of people who have it all right and are
waiting for the world outside to realize it. A bunch of people who,
like the Israelites of old, have gotten it wrong time and again but
who still show up, still try, still ask God to take them just one
step closer to what He wants them to be. People who do not cover up
their awkwardness to welcome the awkward into their world.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">We don't
see it often. But when we do, we recognize it immediately. It's
grace.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq" style="text-align: center;">
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiHRy4fh7CMfoN1ghKi7YPR_08-8SXxdNk7t_0jLW5BmHoEtHkqX4Wq9WCDmg4dXxnD9hHyDb8FnqBt37D72vW4G0C8mN4yZNUJRhcBjN730ALfP1PZmpdUARAcK40BzpSE5BBsgji9ors/s1600/11033186_10100499280325419_109774404520855125_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiHRy4fh7CMfoN1ghKi7YPR_08-8SXxdNk7t_0jLW5BmHoEtHkqX4Wq9WCDmg4dXxnD9hHyDb8FnqBt37D72vW4G0C8mN4yZNUJRhcBjN730ALfP1PZmpdUARAcK40BzpSE5BBsgji9ors/s320/11033186_10100499280325419_109774404520855125_n.jpg" width="213" /></a></div>
<span style="background-color: #d9d2e9; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>“The
breadth of God’s family is mercifully wide. Grace has no
discernment, apparently. Jesus created a motley crew, plucking us
from every context and inaugurating a piecemeal clan that has only
ever functioned with mercy. We should be grabbing hands, throwing our
heads back, and laughing that God saved us all, because surely this
is the messiest family ever and He loves us anyway. Our shared
redemption should keep us grateful and kind, because what other
response even makes sense?”</b></span></blockquote>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">That last
line. That's grace. </span>
<br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEilL5nMgOX5KDPFo8NJvLz_f0etabJC6aJr1Cyn4OJHBk_YaaiyWcqBb79faCDvTSFR91GyAbR8LaTaGHHoMByq_FoHuuzk6xjwUbOpYCpdKypEYXQaX_KLkW6poogkvsMk4w34DBvXriQ/s1600/11049500_10152704868827061_7825101607179330559_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEilL5nMgOX5KDPFo8NJvLz_f0etabJC6aJr1Cyn4OJHBk_YaaiyWcqBb79faCDvTSFR91GyAbR8LaTaGHHoMByq_FoHuuzk6xjwUbOpYCpdKypEYXQaX_KLkW6poogkvsMk4w34DBvXriQ/s320/11049500_10152704868827061_7825101607179330559_n.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">A favorite quote from another great book.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br /></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03774267389873705088noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-149833790792062928.post-68222002933675302702015-08-28T09:55:00.000-05:002015-08-28T09:55:03.378-05:00Back to School Tips from a Finished Mom<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjHjrPmQ_LRboT9Et7ArwKGL2OXTVYM0lIknWqUchmwRBnrM56pCt8GCn36V5rkaqnX5nmW6Q9xjDRbdMDp8F7WIYPgBli78EN7bR20XraOArUbrmCOh68QsDca2z7XrxVE5J2ASTTzDN8/s1600/IMG_3171.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjHjrPmQ_LRboT9Et7ArwKGL2OXTVYM0lIknWqUchmwRBnrM56pCt8GCn36V5rkaqnX5nmW6Q9xjDRbdMDp8F7WIYPgBli78EN7bR20XraOArUbrmCOh68QsDca2z7XrxVE5J2ASTTzDN8/s400/IMG_3171.jpg" width="233" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">First day of school Middle child. A while ago.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">For the first time in approximately
3700 years, I realized last fall that I did not have to care about
when school started. Or ended. Or did basically anything at any time,
except as it pertained to driving through school zones. I was done.
Three kids more-or-less-successfully shepherded through school. With
a complicated combo of public, home, and private schooling. But we
did it.</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">And then we launched the baby into
college, and I predictably lost it, but all is good, because I got to
blog about it <a href="http://jill-theimperfectjourney.blogspot.com/2014/08/pink-towels-and-new-adventures.html">here </a>in one of my favorite posts that still makes me
cry.</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Those years were crazy. Partly because
I made them so with all the expectations I put on myself to be
Awesome Mom. I do not wear that title well. The tiara slips. But I
wanted to.</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I did the Pinterest lunch ideas, before
Pinterest existed. Ask my kids about the eggs. They still remember
those eggs. I'm not positive they always ate them, but they remember
them. </span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I created elaborate birthday parties at home. I chaperoned
field trips, at least until I lost a couple kids at the Field Museum.
It was totally not my fault they were not as fascinated by the
minerals display as the rest of us. I even chaperoned a high school
trip to Orlando, and that is hard core, people.</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">And now it's done. And I'm writing a
post on five back-to-school tips when I am not going back to school.
(Actually, I am. Me, myself. But that's another story.)</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">But I'm not here at the take-out end of
sending kids back to school to give you great tips for kale salads
that look like ostriches playing kickball (and that your kids will
actually eat). I'm not going to tell you how to color-code your
school supplies with brads and die cuts and washi tape. This is not
something I am an expert in. I <i>am </i>an expert in knowing all
those school supplies will be lost/torn/traded/eaten (it happens)
within the fist two weeks of their life. And you do not want to be
responsible for any kids eating brads and hot glue.</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I'm here with five tips for life in all
its beautiful feelings when you say goodbye to those kids, whether it
be to kindergarten or, like me now, the second year of college. For a
larger perspective at the end. Whether those kids are going on a bus,
driving themselves to high school or headed right back into your
living room to go to school.</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<h3 style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">#1--Feel however you feel. </span></h3>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Elated?
Terrified? Sorrowful? Like turning cartwheels and drinking wine right
there in the middle of the morning? Whatever, guys. <i>All </i>of
those feelings might be cycled through in one hour. It's OK. Feel
them. Don't feel like you're “supposed” to feel. We all react
differently, and it is no measure of our love for our offspring. No
comparisons, no condemnation.
</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<h3 style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">#2--Treasure the firsts and lasts. </span></h3>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEivaJtD8xiW4e0mQDQe78i4r0G6aSPAwf_DwlS2Txti4_VVYP1mlmHqwHQvAPbeKAgA6tkasP0x4n_HTbTGu6Si56dr46E6I-RIWNNTakpw3AwuN4H52z4LQwKZzaCx0FSFvMkXxSi2cDs/s1600/IMG_3204.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEivaJtD8xiW4e0mQDQe78i4r0G6aSPAwf_DwlS2Txti4_VVYP1mlmHqwHQvAPbeKAgA6tkasP0x4n_HTbTGu6Si56dr46E6I-RIWNNTakpw3AwuN4H52z4LQwKZzaCx0FSFvMkXxSi2cDs/s320/IMG_3204.jpg" width="239" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">There's this . . . </td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiuJBhGi_i7qvqZWF4n-39Jihzhl0Y6HvG9wRG-wXwtgBpOSTW6wMP_mC0OqvPnODzRf2FyOXpF0K9eJEL1lpSZesbW7RBoqreWkP_zmrcO5Pt97tcxGUBsHJppbg7keg7Z93w084-qXc8/s1600/IMG_1882.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiuJBhGi_i7qvqZWF4n-39Jihzhl0Y6HvG9wRG-wXwtgBpOSTW6wMP_mC0OqvPnODzRf2FyOXpF0K9eJEL1lpSZesbW7RBoqreWkP_zmrcO5Pt97tcxGUBsHJppbg7keg7Z93w084-qXc8/s320/IMG_1882.JPG" width="213" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">And then there's this. And I swear to you,<br />they were only about three hours apart.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Don't
wait until senior year of high school to realize you will never have
another first day of school, another last packed lunch (hallelujah!),
or another Christmas concert. Treasure them all as they happen. I
know—at times you will want to eat your own toenails more than you
will want to attend another two-hour concert sitting on bleachers.
But trust me, treasure it. It will be over. Enjoy the firsts and
lasts, big and small, as they happen. Just don't believe you have to
create a Pinterest/Facebook moment out of all of them.</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<h3 style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">#3--Be your child's best advocate but not
her biggest excuse. </span></h3>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">She will need you to be in her corner. Especially
if she has special needs teachers, parents, and others do not
understand and don't care to. Stand firmly in that corner and don't
back down. But—don't become his fall back for not making the effort
to stand on his own. You won't always be there. Walk the tightrope of
defending when needed and letting him take his consequences when
needed. It's an art, not a perfect science. You will make mistakes
here. When you do, reference tip #4.</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<h3 style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">#4--Nothing is a permanent mistake. </span></h3>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Remember all those warnings that whatever horrible deeds you did in
school would end up in your permanent record? Yeah, exactly true,
except not. No misplaced homework paper, no unfinished art project,
not even that one time your kid repeated the word your husband said
when he missed the final minutes of the Superbowl are going to matter
<i>At All </i>when your kid tries to get a job on Wall Street.</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Yes, we care about teaching our kids to
be responsible. We care about helping them to use the minds God gave
them to their fullest capacity. We care about making sure they do not
live in our basements forever but do get into college and get jobs.
But we also care about giving grace. Offering second chances. Not
acting like the end of the world hovers over our heads if they color
the grass purple and the sun blue. Kids make mistakes. They are not
forever. Dispense grace. Liberally.</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Nothing is a permanent mistake for you,
either. Not the time you forgot to pack the birthday cupcake. Not the
time you sent him to school with a 102 fever because you were sure he
was faking it. Not even the time you missed the first grade mother's
day program because you couldn't get out of Home Depot on time. (I
have no personal experience in that last one. None. Except that I
still have not forgiven myself for that. And the kid is almost 25.)
You, mom or dad, will make mistakes. Reference #3. Dispense grace. To
yourself. It is not forever. It will not be on your permanent record
unless <i>you</i> put it there. Don't.</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<h3 style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Remember the big picture. </span></h3>
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjuk2nelr24R2BQNIruSPPwY2aezKUWGeb-KMoIhktMo3jMWdxzRXJLjxdwABh8KhkDS-Jy8eT-94iddrfQBhKcpKOtrgJe4asOnuJj65mQMeksmLKZPu6ED75AGH1F3srS925BG8mzXbE/s1600/DSCF0270.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="265" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjuk2nelr24R2BQNIruSPPwY2aezKUWGeb-KMoIhktMo3jMWdxzRXJLjxdwABh8KhkDS-Jy8eT-94iddrfQBhKcpKOtrgJe4asOnuJj65mQMeksmLKZPu6ED75AGH1F3srS925BG8mzXbE/s320/DSCF0270.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">China. Better than school.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Life is not
about perfect papers or team sports or science fair projects that get
your kid in the newspaper. It's about doing what God has for you to
do and being what God has for you to be. For both you and your kid.
Step back. Breathe. Drop activities that make you crazy. Your kid
isn't going to the big leagues or the Olympics. Take the time to
enjoy one another now and grow in God. Don't sacrifice those things
for the things that will not matter in the end. <i>Make the time to put them first.</i></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">We took our kids on a mission trip
during school. The world did not end, and they did not fail
first/fifth/sixth grade. I took my daughter out of school for a zoo
trip on her birthday. No one turned us in to DFS. (Sh did, however,
get food poisoning from the zoo cafeteria. Karma?) Sometimes, the big
picture memories are far more important than the daily urgent.
Remember the big picture. Step back. Breathe. Trust me on this one.
Earth will remain in orbit.</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">So there you are. Your five
back-to-school tips from one who is finished going back to school.
What are your tips?
</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Happy fall!</span></div>
<br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiLqFLoUZwexYYm5cUPKHHk8AoZip4Cl1HPzv9z323qyLkMnzTAes21tRaZJO__2qa34_VZqF2uDFtTsii8rbiuBHpzuhfUOZJnHgdk7DpPJGnxWR4PIa4ZmPYoLHo4_RcH2BpqDMjxFCk/s1600/IMG_5305.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiLqFLoUZwexYYm5cUPKHHk8AoZip4Cl1HPzv9z323qyLkMnzTAes21tRaZJO__2qa34_VZqF2uDFtTsii8rbiuBHpzuhfUOZJnHgdk7DpPJGnxWR4PIa4ZmPYoLHo4_RcH2BpqDMjxFCk/s400/IMG_5305.jpg" width="348" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">And remember--you're egg-straordinary!</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03774267389873705088noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-149833790792062928.post-77507738996821750672015-08-25T08:48:00.002-05:002015-08-25T08:48:23.289-05:00If it Isn't True for Everyone <div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjWJPixv8J7HSeITjr8AU8VFm0aKdBhzCpcpqEqFPPbdF_Xu_28FDaO3eGc1XZS1MOe5aJtmCLCoYcOhyphenhyphenrxgNtPmF25VyrQKcg0TFJpLgCKuf1CPUlVcopSjFlLm3wTRXJIfoRSVeNKZtc/s1600/545136_10200310836960495_1578882029_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="266" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjWJPixv8J7HSeITjr8AU8VFm0aKdBhzCpcpqEqFPPbdF_Xu_28FDaO3eGc1XZS1MOe5aJtmCLCoYcOhyphenhyphenrxgNtPmF25VyrQKcg0TFJpLgCKuf1CPUlVcopSjFlLm3wTRXJIfoRSVeNKZtc/s400/545136_10200310836960495_1578882029_n.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
<h2>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: x-large; line-height: 16px;">(More Musings on <i>For the Love</i> book and new musings on the gospel)</span></span></h2>
<span style="color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 100%; text-decoration: none;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="color: black; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 100%; text-decoration: none;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I
have been blessed for the last several months to be a part of the
launch team for Jen Hatmaker's new book, <i>For the Love: Fighting for Grace in a World of Impossible Standards </i>(available
now on Amazon).</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="font-weight: normal;">For
the last couple and one more week, I'm taking chapters of the book
that meant a lot to me and discussing them. Thus far, we've covered
crazy self-imposed expectations of parenting and responding to the
millennial generation (without being crappy Christians :) ).</span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></span></span></span></span></span>
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="font-weight: normal;">This
week another topic dear to my heart and the heartbeat of God's
kingdom: what is the gospel really, stripped of our ever-present
tendencies to make it what we want it to be? Jen has a great standard
from which to start that conversation.</span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="background-color: #fff2cc; font-weight: normal;"><br /></span></span></span></span></span>
<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="text-decoration: none;">“<span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="font-weight: normal;">But
then God changed my life, and everything got weird. I discovered the
rest of the world! And other cultures! And different Christian
traditions! And people who were way, way different from me! And
poverty! Then the system in which God operated according to my rules
started disintegrating. I started hearing my gospel narrative through
the ears of the Other, and a giant whole bunch of it didn’t even
make sense. Some values and perspectives and promises I attributed to
God’s own heart only worked in my context, and I’m no theologian,
but surely that is problematic.<br /> </span></span></span></span></span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="background-color: #fff2cc; font-weight: normal;"><br /></span></span></span></span></span><span style="background-color: #fff2cc; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">There is
a biblical benchmark I now use. We will refer to this criterion for
every hard question, big idea, topic, assessment of our own
obedience, every “should” or “should not” and “will” or
“will not” we ascribe to God, every theological sound bite. Here
it is:<br /> </span><span style="background-color: #fff2cc; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="background-color: #fff2cc; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><i>If it
isn’t also true for a poor single Christian mom in Haiti, it isn’t
true</i>.</b>”</span><span style="background-color: #fff2cc; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">(Chapter 3, On Calling and Haitian Moms)</span></blockquote>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I love
this. I absolutely, stinkin' love this. It's so simple. Some time
ago, I wrote a <a href="http://jill-theimperfectjourney.blogspot.com/2014/03/the-bible-in-14-words.html">post on the gospel</a> and what it really is. I asked
people to narrow it down to 25 words or fewer. Some of you did, and
it was great. (Mine was fourteen. Top that. OK, maybe Jesus would not
be quite so . . . competitive.)</span><br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhImFn0Xb7agOyrIYz2g_3dDdxvhdSui-L4jT7Tn8Txd3IPMBEFdCtaVB4abEkWbg2UtFVgvFiyeEBOFYwG2jq9EMjx_Gr0KEnH2yFquZhmHPixA5uFt4tPEGRFFvTqEaP-AEBodCyZ9H4/s1600/406154_10200308163890342_210243448_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhImFn0Xb7agOyrIYz2g_3dDdxvhdSui-L4jT7Tn8Txd3IPMBEFdCtaVB4abEkWbg2UtFVgvFiyeEBOFYwG2jq9EMjx_Gr0KEnH2yFquZhmHPixA5uFt4tPEGRFFvTqEaP-AEBodCyZ9H4/s320/406154_10200308163890342_210243448_n.jpg" width="239" /></a><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">If the
last year of political posturing and pontificating on how Jesus'
gospel relates to this crazy world has taught us anything at all,
it's that Christians have wildly different views on that answer. And
that we are quite pleased to knock our brothers and sisters out of
the kingdom ring like Rock 'em Sock 'em Robots if their
interpretation differs from ours.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Ferguson a year ago touched off a hurricane of argument that has rebounded with every touchstone event. Staten Island. McKinney. Supreme
Court decisions. Charleston. Perhaps the fact that the list refuses
to end should be a clue that we are to take this seriously. There
needs to be a gospel response. And it needs to be the <i>real </i>gospel.
Not the gospel I carry around in my head and heart because it's near
and dear to all I've ever known.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">It needs
to be a gospel for the Haitian mamas. Because Jesus came for
everyone—including me <i>and everyone else</i>. If what I'm saying is
Jesus' gospel response to the issues of our day is not true for the
Haitian mama, it's not true. If it's not true for the black daughter
grieving the loss of her mother in a church basement, it isn't true.
If it sin't true for the illegal immigrant mama terrified of
returning to a country that will sell her son to drug lords, it isn't
true. If it isn't true for the gay person who won't consider any
claim of Christ because he's read between the lines of “hate the
sin but love the sinner” and knows he's not loved at all, it isn't
true. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Are these tough issues? Yes. Is the gospel capable of handling them? Yes. If we let it be what it is. All it is and not all it isn't.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq" style="text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjr-makQpdJSJAjfAZt_y-goyHXrrFxf4oVSFIgP22ZPX-JXb9uMpShmogl7rtAbtBsEJOKlzZt6zj46vE8dkN7fTPIJoGE12uq9Bg_L-zr502twKNwRImVBFYdUFlRakOSwZ90jk-pzrM/s1600/11825057_10206369296585218_7780304749675916547_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjr-makQpdJSJAjfAZt_y-goyHXrrFxf4oVSFIgP22ZPX-JXb9uMpShmogl7rtAbtBsEJOKlzZt6zj46vE8dkN7fTPIJoGE12uq9Bg_L-zr502twKNwRImVBFYdUFlRakOSwZ90jk-pzrM/s320/11825057_10206369296585218_7780304749675916547_n.jpg" width="320" /></a><span style="background-color: #fff2cc; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">“Theology
is either true everywhere or it isn’t true anywhere. This helps
untangle us from the American God Narrative and sets God free to be
God instead of the My-God-in-a-Pocket I carried for so long. It lends
restraint when declaring what God does or does not think, because
sometimes my portrayal of God’s ways sounds suspiciously like the
American Dream and I had better check myself. Because of the Haitian
single mom. Maybe I should speak less for God.”</span></blockquote>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Maybe
speaking less for God involves first taking a scalpel to my
God-in-a-pocket version of the gospel and learning what it truly is.
All that it is and, maybe more importantly for today, all it is not.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><i>God
created. We broke. God loved. He fixed. </i></span></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><i>We love back—we help fix. </i></span>
</span></div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">That's the gospel. Winnowed down. All that it is. Not all it isn't.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">We messed
it up. We <i>all </i>messed it up. We keep messing it up. But every once in
a while, we have a chance to look around, see clearly how messed up
things really are, and declare, “Not on my watch.” </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiv4L1-AXw0qBPQ8jo5f63pY_eE4KJa65A3URaNeJN8qnkYPb7g1UWhsLOmnixPIVmC5UBvS8euRE6p2vzlZWouzmY5Ay-80vEHCOAoVHFTitk0unQENyg8BAPrGbfwa0gFccGzuIaGZyI/s1600/254676_10200310815799966_1301092773_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="266" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiv4L1-AXw0qBPQ8jo5f63pY_eE4KJa65A3URaNeJN8qnkYPb7g1UWhsLOmnixPIVmC5UBvS8euRE6p2vzlZWouzmY5Ay-80vEHCOAoVHFTitk0unQENyg8BAPrGbfwa0gFccGzuIaGZyI/s400/254676_10200310815799966_1301092773_n.jpg" width="400" /></a><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Not so long as
the gospel means what it really means. That Jesus came to unmess our
mess. And once we accept that beautiful, intense, mop-up grace, he wants us to
help clean up the mess. He wants us to be restorers and reconcilers.
Not restorers of the American God Dream. Restorers of God's creation
plan. I think it looks a tad different than we imagine. I think it's beautiful.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">To order Jen's book, click<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Love-Fighting-Grace-Impossible-Standards/dp/0718031822/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1438373750&sr=1-1&keywords=for+the+love"> here.</a></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Are you interested in a book club discussion of her book? Comment below!</span><br />
<br />
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03774267389873705088noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-149833790792062928.post-64173165483758806132015-08-18T07:30:00.000-05:002015-08-18T07:35:28.352-05:00Are We Muzzling the Next Generation? <div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg88rzohS0ktU-XvqfcFaKwj7_NquMmuHjwYxnNL_HFfOn0F7TcKniThRzA6dXNVLi267xtY_OM5vhoL99oDVzvnrKVRRVjnvcy9KfnPIaKYireKEosDXwcECdk2M3DaKlX0orrZ-_aT34/s1600/11033186_10100499280325419_109774404520855125_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em; text-decoration: none;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg88rzohS0ktU-XvqfcFaKwj7_NquMmuHjwYxnNL_HFfOn0F7TcKniThRzA6dXNVLi267xtY_OM5vhoL99oDVzvnrKVRRVjnvcy9KfnPIaKYireKEosDXwcECdk2M3DaKlX0orrZ-_aT34/s320/11033186_10100499280325419_109774404520855125_n.jpg" width="213" /></a><span style="color: black;"></span></div>
<h3 style="text-align: center;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; line-height: 16px;">(further commentary on Jen Hatmaker's new book, For the Love)</span></span></h3>
<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="line-height: 100%;"><br /></span></span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="line-height: 100%;">I
have been blessed beyond expectations for the last several months to
be a part of the launch team for Jen Hatmaker's new book, </span><i style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 100%; text-decoration: none;">For the
Love: Fighting for Grace in a World of Impossible Standards </i><span style="line-height: 100%;">(available </span><a href="http://www.amazon.com/Love-Fighting-Grace-Impossible-Standards/dp/0718031822/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1438373750&sr=1-1&keywords=for+the+love" style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 100%; text-decoration: none;">now on Amazon</a><span style="line-height: 100%;">).</span></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in; text-decoration: none;">
<br /></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">For
the next few weeks, I'll be taking chapters of the book that meant a
lot to me and discussing them. Please, chime in.</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in; text-decoration: none;">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Given
my current book writing project (and it is very exciting!), it should
not be a surprise that Jen Hatmaker's chapter “Jesus Kids” both
broke my heart and validated everything I know about raising the next
generation to be followers of Jesus. </span>
<br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Not
followers of me. Or a political party. Or a church. Or a code of
behavior.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #4c1130; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><i>Of
Jesus.</i></b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">It
makes a huge difference.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh0_bU0Wq_bDuGRZsd7-Sptatpm0pW3zb4WDjh-aJApftMG2OuwxECt6lVKa0uBe5KXsM3Jgxa24OhyYOdViMLTIT53NbOuTyHnkJqvNJ6jdRnzjjCOS94j770UC6ivxuCWAxLIqWht7XY/s1600/392255_10150340863927854_528697853_7968149_1442978658_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="238" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh0_bU0Wq_bDuGRZsd7-Sptatpm0pW3zb4WDjh-aJApftMG2OuwxECt6lVKa0uBe5KXsM3Jgxa24OhyYOdViMLTIT53NbOuTyHnkJqvNJ6jdRnzjjCOS94j770UC6ivxuCWAxLIqWht7XY/s320/392255_10150340863927854_528697853_7968149_1442978658_n.jpg" width="320" /></a><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Seventy-five
percent of our younger generation is leaving the church, and the
worst part? Some people seem almost glad about it. Their us-them
outlook on following God allows many folks to say good-bye to the
backside of anyone who criticizes the church with self-assured
conviction that theirs is the high ground of defending the faith.
(See her chapter “Dear Christians, Please Stop Being Crappy.”
Just the title . . . yep.)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">But
isn't it about time we stopped wringing our hands over how unhappy
being criticized makes us feel and started being more unhappy about
losing an entire generation for the kingdom of God? Isn't it time we
stopped building our own little kingdoms and looked around at the
havoc defending those personal fiefdoms is truly causing? Do I want
to stand up for His kingdom or mine? The former may not look like
what I think it looks like. It may not even look like what I want it
to look like. But it will be His. </span>
<br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Jen
mentions a great first step.</span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i><br /></i></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<i>“<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">First,
pay attention to the grievances. This is no time to defend our
perspectives and dig in our heels. <b>We have to raise the kids we
have, not the kids we were</b>. Young adults are abandoning
church, so we can either listen carefully or watch their backs as
they go. We cannot be more committed to our methods than our message.
Do we want to raise disciples? Then pay equal attention to what isn’t
working as much as what is.”</span></i></div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">She
pounds out a message you'll hear continually on this blog. A message
central to the book I'm working on.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Listen.</b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><br /></b></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Just.
Shut. Up. And listen.</b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">And
realize that we have churned out a generation who knows what movies
are OK, what books will send them straight to the devil, what clothes
are not God-approved, and what groups of people are untouchable. </span>
<br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i>But
they have no clue why any of this matters.</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">They
know Jesus loves them and wants them to be good. <i><b>But they do not know
Jesus.</b></i> They don't know what the width of their shoulder straps has to
do with the gospel. They see this kind of gospel as lacking anything
of substance for meaningful life. </span>
<br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">And
they are right. I can't say how much I love her take on this:</span><br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
“<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Are
we arrogant and judgmental? Do we subtly (or overtly) teach our
children to suspect anyone 'other'? Do we put mainly defensive
spiritual tools in our kids’ hands, fostering an 'against them'
rather than 'for them' posture? Do we emphasize behavior over
character? Because good behavior won't guarantee anything. If they
don’t love Jesus and people, it matters zero if they remain virgins
and don’t say the F-word. <b><span style="color: #4c1130;">We must shepherd their hearts, not just
their hemlines.</span></b>”</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhIlGb9oljPLk61l2tEuAViK8FKHHGzAE7tLIGWWn4XysoKgGDFEoGdVxVbySkuIWOmHGeVZYgo7Lwn2U66Dr2724UL9_X4g5ib9WwQJ7aGJrcVYu7ZJpIqhKx2ya4-IL9BYM9Al6liJDg/s1600/IMG_4969.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhIlGb9oljPLk61l2tEuAViK8FKHHGzAE7tLIGWWn4XysoKgGDFEoGdVxVbySkuIWOmHGeVZYgo7Lwn2U66Dr2724UL9_X4g5ib9WwQJ7aGJrcVYu7ZJpIqhKx2ya4-IL9BYM9Al6liJDg/s320/IMG_4969.JPG" width="320" /></a><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Shepherd
their hearts. To do that, we need to know their hearts. We need to
hear them. We need to just stop talking long enough to listen to the
heartbeat that informs their life and gives them passion. Then
shepherd them into using that passion for the Kingdom. But it can't
be done if we care more about setting them straight than showing them
Jesus.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I
so want to hear the heartbeat of the next generation. I want to see
them unleashed to do what God has put into their hearts to do. I do
not want to hold them back, even as I do want to make sure they are
equipped with all the truth they need to pass on in their turn. </span>
<br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">This
book has great insight into how we do that. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">If
you want more information on our own writing project on this theme,
visit <a href="https://justhearmeoutbook.wordpress.com/">here</a>. </span>
<br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">To order Jen's fantastic book, available<i><b> today</b></i>--click <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Love-Fighting-Grace-Impossible-Standards/dp/0718031822/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1438373750&sr=1-1&keywords=for+the+love">here</a>. You will not be sorry.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Are you interested in a book club discussion of her book? Comment below!</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg4Y06fhbgQebf0d8j-42dlPCQ92mCCJ6oDAj1FvLHGnXeNUYRE7Vu8M29S54lTz2_CnXtbXy0IdSGbxcojvPVCizC8iLpje4h5NODxBO59qn-QZn79Hac6qQOFRDOTxYJiqchBq05nVvA/s1600/IMG_4552.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg4Y06fhbgQebf0d8j-42dlPCQ92mCCJ6oDAj1FvLHGnXeNUYRE7Vu8M29S54lTz2_CnXtbXy0IdSGbxcojvPVCizC8iLpje4h5NODxBO59qn-QZn79Hac6qQOFRDOTxYJiqchBq05nVvA/s320/IMG_4552.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03774267389873705088noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-149833790792062928.post-85830227630211080372015-08-14T07:50:00.002-05:002015-08-14T07:51:14.710-05:00For the Love of Five Great Quotes<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgho0IE1CzdCKSh4X3P9Idj0oHCp-ty4ksgDkXqFw_KgFZ7PJEk5Y1OQT_eXZFqQ8Nw_qPUJtp2uIAiplWIeQL9DrdH9y9D1awiAFhFeMmCHVb70ewUbtncC5j-gJdnAbZwxQ_3td2svC8/s1600/11033186_10100499280325419_109774404520855125_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgho0IE1CzdCKSh4X3P9Idj0oHCp-ty4ksgDkXqFw_KgFZ7PJEk5Y1OQT_eXZFqQ8Nw_qPUJtp2uIAiplWIeQL9DrdH9y9D1awiAFhFeMmCHVb70ewUbtncC5j-gJdnAbZwxQ_3td2svC8/s320/11033186_10100499280325419_109774404520855125_n.jpg" width="212" /></a><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">As I mentioned in Monday's blog, I've been blessed to be a part of the launch team for Jen Hatmaker's new book, <i>For the Love: Fighting for Grace in a World of Impossible Standards</i>, (officially releasing next week!). It has been a ride I won't forget for a book that should be on everyone's bookshelf and heart. This Friday, we are <a href="http://mrsdisciple.com/for-the-love-of-five/">linking up</a> to share our favorite five quotes from the book. Let me tell you, this was tough. Five? Five???? I have, like, five hundred. But here we are. I whittled it down. Here is a quick taste of why I love her words.</span><br />
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<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><i><br /></i></span></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><i>"If it
isn’t also true for a poor single Christian mom in Haiti, it isn’t
true</i>.</span><span style="color: #990000; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> </span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg1qhUXNWI8Zhg-Yk8tQcVwEBHeBwccRyUZi25nJQAIOsYMJDR5lpxGr8ikftLVzqxTDXqW4UihZkCGkhEzGvdA1Zb_uQLrJ2IcvIcJvi_QlncKeyYfT6d7On07nVtVMl874WWiz75wGyc/s1600/P1040945.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg1qhUXNWI8Zhg-Yk8tQcVwEBHeBwccRyUZi25nJQAIOsYMJDR5lpxGr8ikftLVzqxTDXqW4UihZkCGkhEzGvdA1Zb_uQLrJ2IcvIcJvi_QlncKeyYfT6d7On07nVtVMl874WWiz75wGyc/s320/P1040945.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Theology
is either true everywhere or it isn’t true anywhere. This helps
untangle us from the American God Narrative and sets God free to be
God instead of the My-God-in-a-Pocket I carried for so long. It lends
restraint when declaring what God does or does not think, because
sometimes my portrayal of God’s ways sounds suspiciously like the
American Dream and I had better check myself. Because of the Haitian
single mom. Maybe I should speak less for God." </span></div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">This one has gone into a sermon already. And will again. Amen, sister. Soooo amen.</span><br />
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<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"May I
suggest a starting place as truth receivers? It is okay for someone
else to struggle. Furthermore, it is okay to not fix it/solve
it/answer it/discredit it. Another believer can experience tension,
say something true that makes people uncomfortable, and God will not
fall off His throne. It is not our responsibility to fix every mess.
If someone steps onto the scary ledge of truth, it is enough to
acknowledge her courage and make this promise: <i>I
am here with you as your friend, not your Savior</i>. </span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: #351c75; font-size: large;">We are not good gods over one another; we are better humans beside
each other."</span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiZVFMrV_WPVcerqEAv-6y0lvss2fple-CPVvpIB5fl3IKbvrOnxfkGfJaRKa_tQ3_1SPJsDgH04oTnWGyYeplupNqTocBKUqzJCXl0hl2gJ0lhcp61ycbyqtm7OIWaNhtIQCkjCusdvWA/s1600/P1020775.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiZVFMrV_WPVcerqEAv-6y0lvss2fple-CPVvpIB5fl3IKbvrOnxfkGfJaRKa_tQ3_1SPJsDgH04oTnWGyYeplupNqTocBKUqzJCXl0hl2gJ0lhcp61ycbyqtm7OIWaNhtIQCkjCusdvWA/s320/P1020775.JPG" width="320" /></a><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"Are we
arrogant and judgmental? Do we subtly (or overtly) teach our children
to suspect anyone “other”? Do we put mainly defensive spiritual
tools in our kids’ hands, fostering an “against them” rather
than “for them” posture? Do we emphasize behavior over character?
Because good behavior won't guarantee anything. If they don’t love
Jesus and people, it matters zero if they remain virgins and don’t
say the F-word. </span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="color: #134f5c; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">We must shepherd their hearts, not just their
hemlines. </span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The best
we can do is give them Jesus. Not rules, not behaviors, not
entertainment, not shame. I have no confidence in myself but every
confidence in Jesus."</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: #073763; font-size: large;">"You’ll
never regret parting with grace, but you might deeply regret burning
a bridge that might one day be safe to venture back over again."</span></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: #073763; font-size: large;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjyd0-QMcumK6ZWtRj59jfEamf7pHb0oWyWKLpzPKOIMyNKS6khDL8OAizH4vVQ-7dcL4qURcze_aiKBGplFK4lDL3Kd3oW5njKTNCyYlD8lWuMpiWjUqAdrAbQtk5IyKCxqW7-Lb26qSE/s1600/IMG_0057.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjyd0-QMcumK6ZWtRj59jfEamf7pHb0oWyWKLpzPKOIMyNKS6khDL8OAizH4vVQ-7dcL4qURcze_aiKBGplFK4lDL3Kd3oW5njKTNCyYlD8lWuMpiWjUqAdrAbQtk5IyKCxqW7-Lb26qSE/s320/IMG_0057.JPG" width="240" /></a></div>
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<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"The
breadth of God’s family is mercifully wide. Grace has no
discernment, apparently. Jesus created a motley crew, plucking us
from every context and inaugurating a piecemeal clan that has only
ever functioned with mercy. We should be grabbing hands, throwing our
heads back, and laughing that God saved us all, because surely this
is the messiest family ever and He loves us anyway. </span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: #4c1130; font-size: large;">Our shared
redemption should keep us grateful and kind, because what other
response even makes sense?"</span></span></div>
<br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Is this enough to make you preorder the book? Take a look on Amazon? Well, you can <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Love-Fighting-Grace-Impossible-Standards/dp/0718031822/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1439556301&sr=1-1&keywords=for+the+love">right here</a>. Be back Monday with more.</span><br />
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03774267389873705088noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-149833790792062928.post-17254702168871670002015-08-03T08:00:00.000-05:002015-08-03T08:00:07.520-05:00Mostly Good Is a Raging Success<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgwVRwBczlVXmZg-_pcCtdtnSULLA316WtGLJPp-3-SNoTiimXHDhszV_zs3KKxAxM3D79HaK5li4lcSjAOfhz_KvCt1pyeO34r5whPGmCffWhnfYbGFT8MF6m-IibmA6aoiw66vxWVhGw/s1600/11033186_10100499280325419_109774404520855125_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgwVRwBczlVXmZg-_pcCtdtnSULLA316WtGLJPp-3-SNoTiimXHDhszV_zs3KKxAxM3D79HaK5li4lcSjAOfhz_KvCt1pyeO34r5whPGmCffWhnfYbGFT8MF6m-IibmA6aoiw66vxWVhGw/s640/11033186_10100499280325419_109774404520855125_n.jpg" width="426" /></a></div>
<div style="font-weight: normal; line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: small;">I
have been blessed beyond expectations for the last several months to
be a part o the launch team for Jen Hatmaker's new book, <i>For the Love</i>
(available for preorder now on <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Love-Fighting-Grace-Impossible-Standards/dp/0718031822/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1438373750&sr=1-1&keywords=for+the+love">Amazon</a>).</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: small;">Beyond
expectation, because beside the opportunity to read a fantastic book
before anyone else (I am slightly competitive?), the community that
has formed among the launch team members has been phenomenal. Advice,
weeping with those who weep, laughter, and discussions about online
dating have been just a few of the things discussed. You may not want
to know. We hang it all out there, and it feels like community. Which
is kind of what this book is all about.</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: small;">For
the next few weeks, I'll be taking chapters of the book that meant a
lot to me and discussing them. Please, chime in.</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in; text-align: center; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="color: purple; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Chapters
1,9,10:</b></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in; text-align: center; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="color: purple; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Worst Beam Ever, Hope for Spicy Families, and Surviving
School</b></span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmi2_1KDkebWre5MvE19q226gDtlP4-bTTsCl25nZvpqZ_NgFGtklHphUIXyg6j8GaMtfhLtRv5GTeftxLw7h5Yl2v3YtiNKefNO6V0A1_2Xm_-2EJfeQPh64-h5ryXE1vBGcpdGthH90/s1600/385162_2825021588284_1341343465_33070477_1461533618_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="266" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmi2_1KDkebWre5MvE19q226gDtlP4-bTTsCl25nZvpqZ_NgFGtklHphUIXyg6j8GaMtfhLtRv5GTeftxLw7h5Yl2v3YtiNKefNO6V0A1_2Xm_-2EJfeQPh64-h5ryXE1vBGcpdGthH90/s400/385162_2825021588284_1341343465_33070477_1461533618_n.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Because balance beams are for gymnasts, not parents.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<div style="font-weight: normal; line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: small;">Raising
kids. In a Pinterest world. Can I get an amen on that dilemma? The
subtitle of the book says it all here: <i>Fighting for Grace in a World
of Impossible Standards</i>.</span></span></div>
<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0in; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">There is
a reason my talk “The Enemy of Good Enough” is popular among MOPS
groups. (Though not as popular as the anger management for moms one.
That's a ringer anywhere.) We all feel “not good enough.” We all
doubt ourselves. No matter how many birthday parties we throw, how
many classrooms we volunteer in, how many times we read <i>Good Night
Moon</i> together (and it is a <i>lot</i> of times), we still feel
there is more we should be doing to ensure our kids will grow up
safe, sane, and with a low likelihood of criminal activity.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><i>Not
enough. Not enough. Never. Enough.</i></b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The funny
thing is, as Jen points out, no generation of parents has ever done
more to effect that guarantee.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="background-color: #ead1dc; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>“Condemnation
is a trick of the enemy, not the language of the heavens. Shame is
not God’s tool, so if we are slaves to it, we’re way off the
beaten path. And it is harsh out there, debilitating actually. If
your inner monologue is critical, endlessly degrading, it’s time to
move back to grace. Then we can breathe and assess our own parenting
with the same kindness we extend to others. Only our overly-critical,
overly-involved generation could engineer such carefully curated
childhood environments and still declare ourselves failures. We are
loving, capable mothers reading the room all wrong. . . .We no longer
assess our lives with any accuracy. We have lost the ability to
declare a job well-done. We measure our performance against an
<i>invented standard </i>and come up wanting, and it is destroying
our joy. </b></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="background-color: #ead1dc; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="text-decoration: none;"><b>We
need to quit trying to be awesome and instead be wise.”</b></span></span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></span></span></span></span></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">You know
what a huge part of the problem with not letting ourselves off the
hook is? We truly think that, if we remain on this self-manufactured
hook, we can control the outcome. The problem is, there is no
guarantee. Ever. No amount of quality parental hoop-jumping will ever
ensure your kids turn out perfect. They will never be totally safe
from either harm in the world or their own bad choices. And that
kills us. So we try to control it with every little
pinterest-approved healthy meal or bonding craft we can muster. We
<i>will</i> get it right. Enough will ensure the future.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Enough
never is. It never will be. Stop trying to be awesome. Rest in the
grace of knowing, really knowing, that the One who is in control has
this. No promises of safety. But abundant promises of care and
provision and loving arms that wrap around you in all heartaches and
fears.
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"></span>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiMfNOFJmM_qfaCdPmMx3eqKoNhUqWiuT1lYy7KFwufOE2ZPwQ1vQfbCRmRUVzOlkXR6YDcxlnfu7OFzghYj3TgInh2EHJvKKPjo0Xmbv7Lyr2tkGMmm2Whmgn05vxI4VREx0XvqfZcYvs/s1600/P1020851.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiMfNOFJmM_qfaCdPmMx3eqKoNhUqWiuT1lYy7KFwufOE2ZPwQ1vQfbCRmRUVzOlkXR6YDcxlnfu7OFzghYj3TgInh2EHJvKKPjo0Xmbv7Lyr2tkGMmm2Whmgn05vxI4VREx0XvqfZcYvs/s400/P1020851.JPG" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Because this is just not real life.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">We can't
ensure the future, and in fact, we shouldn't. Our kids do not need to
grow up expecting mom to create wonderful experiences every time
something scary or threatening or sad happens. They need us to hold
their hands and bring them before the One who can get them through
the sad/threatening/scary times. The times they will face someday
without mommy around. <i><b>They need us to teach them how to handle sad
and scary.</b></i> All by themselves. Without dolphin sandwiches. (You'll
just have to read the book to understand that one.)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I love
this quote that lets us all off that terrible hook we put ourselves
on:</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="background-color: #ead1dc; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>“Can I
tell you my goal for my kids? That their childhood is mostly good.
People, I declare “mostly good” a raging success. If I am mostly
patient and they are mostly obedient, great. If we are mostly
nurturing and they turn out mostly well-adjusted, super.”</b></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Isn't
that freeing? Isn't mostly good truly good enough? Can we give
ourselves grace to be mostly good? Our kids will thank us.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Find Jen's book <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Love-Fighting-Grace-Impossible-Standards/dp/0718031822/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1438373750&sr=1-1&keywords=for+the+love">here</a>. Trust me, this is so worth it. I'll keep telling you why for the next couple weeks!</span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03774267389873705088noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-149833790792062928.post-30858470760450274062015-07-31T11:59:00.000-05:002015-08-31T13:22:42.993-05:00Dangerous Love<div align="CENTER" style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-size: 11pt;">My
“anything” prayer happened in a credit union lobby, viewing
security tapes. The image on the tape was shady, in more ways than
one. He wore a hoodie pulled low over his brow, not surprising, since
having anyone see his face would have been detrimental to his
purpose. The tape was grainy, at best. Still, I could identify the
vehicle, and its driver.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjJ9GWwuvh6FzpdAj3A1XNFU_OnodswJMQ4uv8tnr6IkWIGg2h32ijwM6oCOeTWQA63igq82fgTaseLd4EmKplO3xLb1VlpW2yub9VvPiQuRCvgXXQ-tvhQftlaCsFAmQekaZGJ7Prkno8/s1600/393376_273421972702629_943581585_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="241" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjJ9GWwuvh6FzpdAj3A1XNFU_OnodswJMQ4uv8tnr6IkWIGg2h32ijwM6oCOeTWQA63igq82fgTaseLd4EmKplO3xLb1VlpW2yub9VvPiQuRCvgXXQ-tvhQftlaCsFAmQekaZGJ7Prkno8/s320/393376_273421972702629_943581585_n.jpg" width="320" /></a>Explaining
this all to the security woman at the credit union felt like an
out-of-body experience. Surely, this was not my pretty, suburban
Jesus life. Yes, I said. I do know who the young man in the tape is
using my debit card. Yes, I do know he's a drug addict and what he'll
do with the money. Yes, I know if I don't press charges you won't
return the money. No, I still don't want to press charges.
</div>
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<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
Her
look called both my sanity and my intelligence into question. I just
shrugged my shoulders. “I'm a pastor. It's an occupational hazard.
I can't really explain.”
</div>
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<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
I
didn't pray “anything” intentionally. It happened to me the day
Casey happened to me, and I might well have told God I had other,
more pressing business had I any notion of the rough road ahead.
Fortunately, God does not give us those notions. He knows my heart
that would probably have embraced the fear and the comfort rather
than the strange boy in my back hallway.
</div>
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<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
So
I never offered God everything. But by the time he asked it of me, I
could do nothing else. God knows, sometimes, that's the way we work.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
Casey
began life with us as our daughter's boyfriend. (That didn't last
long.) Fortunately for him, that shock of overgrown cocoa-colored
bangs and those huge brown eyes beneath the ever-present hoodie
endeared him to people before they knew him. At least they did to me,
a sucker for shy smiles and already well aware of my daughter's
penchant for collecting what we could euphemistically term “the
least of these.”
</div>
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<br /></div>
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He
had nowhere to go, could he maybe sleep in the basement? OK. I
guessed that would be fine. For a while.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
Two
days later, his mom came knocking on the side door, letting us know
the reason he had nowhere to go--she had a restraining order on him,
because he had stolen from her, again. The same day one of our
mutual friends informed us of his past in detail, containing more
interactions with law enforcement than Snoop Dogg. “He's a loser.
He'll never change. You're out of your mind if you let him in your
house. He'll take you for everything you have.”</div>
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<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEihZ8sgBg70TKVPRakACeh4Lzk6VmMwqRnSkNYmchH0y3nMgYNDPqN9PaeDwB53C_mbCfkjJrXHGlsMFItXtHo2RlAgIHWVFtXpsoyv7bI2ko-z0Kggi1lVBEjy_0Gt0Ytqa_49-2WJ3Qg/s1600/397747_4204597960159_756383061_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEihZ8sgBg70TKVPRakACeh4Lzk6VmMwqRnSkNYmchH0y3nMgYNDPqN9PaeDwB53C_mbCfkjJrXHGlsMFItXtHo2RlAgIHWVFtXpsoyv7bI2ko-z0Kggi1lVBEjy_0Gt0Ytqa_49-2WJ3Qg/s400/397747_4204597960159_756383061_n.jpg" width="391" /></a>And
he tried. I'd never been called to a bank to review security videos,
never had someone steal my debit card and use it to buy gas for ten
of his closest friends. Never had police bang on my door at random
hours. Never sat at the hospital bed of someone who felt so little
hope for life he'd OD on heroin, again. He progressed to grand theft
auto while we were on vacation. Not the video game. The rage I felt
when the gift cards I'd saved points for to give our kids for
Christmas turned up missing the week before—from my underwear
drawer, which feels relentlessly violating—mixed with the sorrow
and desolation of knowing that by this time, I loved this kid.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
OK,
he was no kid; he was 23. But only chronologically.
</div>
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<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
When
Jesus told me to love the least of these, he wasn't being rhetorical.
He didn't mean sending money to African orphans to satisfy my
conscience or buying a pair of shoes so a needy child could have one,
too. Yes, those are good things. I do those things. But until Casey,
I didn't understand that real love takes risks, gets personal, gets
hideously, nakely messy. Real love looks a messed up kid in the eye
and says, “I'm with you for the long haul. What do we have to
do?”And sometimes the crapshot you take with love comes up bust.
There is no guarantee.
</div>
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<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
Every
time I thought I had had enough and was ready to turn this kid in and
wash my hands, I asked God if I could. Well, I kind of begged him.
There were some pretty bad days. And every single time, he said, “No.
I am not done with Casey. So neither are you. <i>Anything?</i>
Really?”
</div>
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<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
As
part of our “I'm not turning you in so now I have some power over
you” strategy, we “sentenced” Casey to community service at our
church. He met people. They loved him no holds barred. He came to a
few services. He went forward to the altar, trying to start over and
get out of the iron-bar-less prison he knew he was still in. He got
better; he got worse; he got better. I felt the Spirit moving me to
go back down to him one night at 2am, long after I had gone to bed
but not to sleep.
</div>
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<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
“Casey,
what's keeping you from turning your life over to God?”</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
“I'm
afraid I'll have to give up the fun I'm having.”</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
“Really?
So, this homeless, jail time, drugs gig is fun? How's that working
out for you?”</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
He
shook his head sheepishly. “Yeah. Not so good.”</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
He
told us no one in twenty-three years had made him feel so loved. Like
the security woman, he shook his head at us and said he could not
understand why.
</div>
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<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
But
eventually, he got it. He got that love beyond all human ability
comes from Jesus alone. A tiny bit of comprehension seeped in that,
maybe, possibly, it wasn't too late for someone like him. A God who
would die for any sin on the books just because he loved us would
love him, too. The Recovery Bible got a used look to it.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
Eventually,
I got it, too. I got that compassion means so much more than a
thoughtful email, and mercy is the greatest inexplicable gift someone
might get from me. I wrote my senior seminary thesis on grace. But I
don't think I knew it at all until I knew Casey. I know now how
amazing grace is not just when its received but when its <i>given</i>.
I've hugged Jesus in the form of a messed-up, love-bewildered kid.
And I'll never see Him the same.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
You
know those stories with bittersweet endings that you hate but know
are really more true than the happily ever after ones? This is that
kind of story. Casey didn't make it in this life. He tried hard. He
went though recovery and was on the road. But there were too many
years of pain and bad choices, and one last time on heroin, after
being clean for a while, was the last. I had to find out through
Facebook, not the number one choice for devastating your heart.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
Sitting
looking at the waves of Lake Michigan roll in that week, I cried for
the man he might have been and the life that could have been his. But
I also cried because I knew, absolutely knew, that at that moment,
Casey was looking at Jesus through eyes free of fog. He had no pain,
no past, no chains of addiction or scars of abuse. He had no tears of
hopelessness or self-hatred. He was free. And I'd never been so happy
for someone in my life. Or sad.
</div>
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<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
“Anything”
prayers may take you no farther than your own back hallway. But
they'll take you much farther than that, once dangerous love sets in.
</div>
<br />
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<br /></div>
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